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Forum
-> Fashion and Beauty
-> Sheitels & Tichels
watergirl
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 Mon, Oct 15 2012, 5:42 am
The sheitel ads in the Jewish magazines!!!!! DH wants to ban them from the house every shabbos when I start in about the adds for shaitels in Mishpacha/Bina/Ami/whatever. Especially the one for "Aziza Wigs... Because Every woman deserves one"  Really??? I can just see the shalom Bayis mounting up. "Honey, I need a new Shaitel, It costs $2000, and I know we have 5 tuitions to pay, and that another baby is on the way, but I DESERVE one!!! The ad says so!".
And THEY ALL come out even more so right before the chaggim. Like, I dont have enough things to spend my money on before succos, with food and a succah and what now. Pesach? Yeah, with all the food and matza... lets but a shaitel. EVERY WOMAN DESERVES IT!
Sorry. Had to get that out.
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b from nj
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Mon, Oct 15 2012, 5:44 am
I guess it should say "b/c every rich woman deserves one"  !!
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Happy18
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Mon, Oct 15 2012, 5:50 am
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I dont think the ads are any different than the ones placed in secular magazines. There are plenty of ads that run saying that every woman deserves one of whatever it is.
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yo'ma
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Mon, Oct 15 2012, 6:09 am
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I don't understand. What do you want them to do? This is their business, they want to sell their product. Deserving is not the same thing as need. They write deserve, which maybe everyone does deserve one. They don't write need because not everyone needs or wants one.
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greenfire
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Mon, Oct 15 2012, 8:26 am
as a once sheitel wearing woman ~ whose sheitel expense was always at the bottom of the list & didn't purchase one other than before the wedding when you don't really know much & then waited till into my 7th year of marriage ... I'd like to comment that
YES  INDEEDY EVERY sheitel-wearing WOMAN DESERVES ONE !!! 
[to the point that once upon a midnight dreary I purchased the dxh's wife one (after she returned it cause of money) yes because I wanted her to know unlike me perhaps her dh should treat her right & make sures she knows this]
why is it that a kapota or a hat or other mitzva related things always seem to come first ??? a woman feeling good & looking good in doing this mitzva should also be a priority !!!
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kb
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Mon, Oct 15 2012, 8:35 am
I believe a husband has a chiyuv to buy his wife something before sukkos - it can be clothing, jewelry, or... a sheitel! So maybe that's who the ad is targeting - not you to make your shalom bayis bad (but dh EVERY woman deserves...) but rather targeting the husband and telling him that every woman deserves one... so when you buy your wife a present, let it be a new sheitel this year.
And you know something? Every woman DOES deserve one - in that every woman deserves to walk around looking presentable and put together. It doesn't mean that you need one of every new sheitel that comes out, but you DO deserve to look good, and a good sheitel is a very big part of that!
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imasinger
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Mon, Oct 15 2012, 9:56 am
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I've had this same pet peeve about ads for years. This whole business of "you should buy this because you deserve it" is so wrong it's hard even to know where to start. But I agree, it's particularly galling to see it used in Jewish circles.
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mimimom
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Mon, Oct 15 2012, 10:05 am
I absolutely agree. "You deserve it" has become WAY too common in the frum community (as it is in the rest of the world). I once had someone try to get me to buy something with this line, and I answered that I deserve to sleep at night and not worry about not having enough to pay the bills! I mean really!
That being said, ignore the ads--banning magazines that you enjoy on Shabbos won't change anything except YOUR enjoyment. Letting go of being annoyed at things like this is a useful tool, as well (One that I actually use--on occasion.  )
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Happy 2B
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Mon, Oct 15 2012, 10:05 am
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Totally agree with OP. It's not that there's an ad. An ad is fine it's the wording. Who says every woman deserves one? I do hear the difference between deserve vs need but a 2000 wig is a big expense.
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21young
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Mon, Oct 15 2012, 10:13 am
Sorry, I don't get the issue. Do you really believe everything you read and need to have everything you see? When you see a real estate listing for a home you can't afford do you get mad at the realtor because he shouldn't advertise something you can't afford?
The companies will do whatever they can to entice you, and it's your job to withstand the temptation if you can't afford it. Chill out; it's just an ad. If you can't afford it turn the page; that's what I do.
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watergirl
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Mon, Oct 15 2012, 10:30 am
Ya know what? Let me clarify and even add to my ad pet peeve... I get ticked off evem MORE when I see an ad in one of those magazines for "affordable chasson kallah furnature" starting at the "low" price of $5000. Who are they selling to??? Not any chassanim or kallahs that I know! Last week, there was an ad for a new housing project on Monsey, and there was a balloon calling for parents to "buy one for your kids today". Are we talking about the newest fad in pokimon toys, or a HOUSE? And Mishpacha has had the NERVE to place these ads in the WORST places!!! I once read an article about the last shoah survivers from whichever city, and the ad for furnature and an ad for a pesach hotel was placed in that same page.
Oh - and can I add one more thing about the ads, which has been bothering me for ever, while I'm on the topic? I hate when the ads say the phone number adn street address, but leave out the state. Now, I know that they assume that the entire world knows that 13th Ave reffers to Boro Park, but when I was living outside of NY, I had no clue! They cant just say "Brooklyn, NY"??? Grrr.
This feeds right into my huge issue with the sheitel industry, which I guess is why I posted this here. Full disclosure - I am a shaitel wearer, and a hat/tichel wearer. Which ever fits my mood/occasion. Dsd told me that she wants to become a shaitel macher when she grows up and all I could do was tell her how they profit by making women feel like they have to spend what they dont have. Dont believe me? Just take a glance at any of the topics in the shaitel forum! How many people are more than dissatisfied with their expencive wigs?
Sorry for the rant. Ya know what? No IM NOT!
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Inspired
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Mon, Oct 15 2012, 10:43 am
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I never notice those ads. I don't wear sheitels.
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imamiri
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Mon, Oct 15 2012, 10:48 am
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I don't see it as any different than any fashion trend in any secular magazine. Or the jewelry ads that basically tell women if their men *really* cared, they'd blow 2 months salary on a (blood)diamond.
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Sherri
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Mon, Oct 15 2012, 10:59 am
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I don't get it. What do you think marketing is about?
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Hashemlovesme
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Mon, Oct 15 2012, 11:03 am
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I thought the same thing as op when seeing those ads, it's the times we live in. When I grew up NOBODY DESERVED ANYTHING (other than basic needs of course), So we def appreciated all the extras we got (trips, toys, treats...). But if these are the things that every woman DESERVES, then what is considered extra? You need a shaitel when you get married? Most would agree yes. But do you NEED at least a weekday & Shabbos shaitel, maybe even a fall too, each costing $2,000.......?
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abeona
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Mon, Oct 15 2012, 11:11 am
seriously your getting mad about ads?!?!?
there are soo many other things to get mad about.
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TranquilityAndPeace
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Mon, Oct 15 2012, 11:22 am
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I'm just wondering if a woman has to do anything to deserve this sheitel, or she just has to breathe?
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Cookies n Cream
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Mon, Oct 15 2012, 1:14 pm
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ckk
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Mon, Oct 15 2012, 1:22 pm
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Or how about "did you get you new sheital/outfit/hat for the new year yet?" giving you the feeling that EVERYBODY gets new things and at the begining of the new year and its a just a matter of getting round to buying it.
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MimiMommy
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Mon, Oct 15 2012, 1:24 pm
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I don't get it. You guys are upset about the harmless wording but not about the fact that these ads have photos of wigs that are so beyond the bounds of tznius it's unbelievable that a magazine that touts itself as "upholding highest standards" and won't put pics of rebbetzins will print it just because of money?
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