acting silly with homework

amother

Thu, Jan 24 2013, 9:56 pm

my son is driving me nuts from doing hw with him. he knows how to read well, but when he's doing his hw, he'll drag out the words, read them backwords, mix up the order, use a really strange voice, etc.
Is it too easy and he's bored? Does he just have no patience to follow directions?
I find myself getting so annoyed...

Mommastuff

Thu, Jan 24 2013, 11:13 pm

there can be so many reasons that your son is acting this way. Is he hungry, tired, distracted, bored...

By the time my dd comes home, eats dinner and starts homework, she doesn't have much brain power left to concentrate on hw after a full day of school. I let her takes brakes between assignments and that sometimes helps.

amother

Fri, Jan 25 2013, 8:11 am

if it were my son, I would tell him he's being silly by doing xyz and it's frustrating for you.
I'd tell him I'm walking away, he can practice it himself and I'll come back later to check his work/reading.
if he does it again when I come back, repeat above and don't sign his homework.
I'd make sure he understands that acting silly and wasting my time is inappropriate and won't be tolerated.
I'd tell him directly that when he acts in xyz manner, he makes me feel xyz and therefore I will walk away,
I'd ask how he feels when I walk away. that is not a pleasant feeling. he can change my thoughts and behaviors by changing the way he acts towards me.

if you suspect the work is too easy for him, ask him. if he says it is, tell him first we'll do the homework morah gave because we listen to a morah, and then you'll give him something challaging and exciting to do.
a maze or wordfind or reading from a high level book.

you can also speak to the teacher about sending harder work for him.

amother

Fri, Jan 25 2013, 2:42 pm

OP
thanks. He likes to read the pesukim extra times for prizes and I've been telling him he can only do extra if he reads it nicely.
I love when he has hw he can do on his own (first grade) but its usually reading that I have to listen to and sign

granolamom

Fri, Jan 25 2013, 2:48 pm

I have a ds who does this too. I suspect he does it for attention. so I told him if he finishes in a certain amount of time we can play a game afterwards. that tends to speed him up.
but you have to know your kid, some kids dont like to be timed so I wouldnt do this in that case.
and I hate when kids want to do extra work for extra prizes on my time. I can see what the teachers are thinking, but I dont have time for all my kids to do all this extra work. one thing if they are independent but if you have to listen, then you should be getting the prizes too.
is he your oldest? if not, maybe an older sibling can listen to him do the extra psukim

mooma

Fri, Jan 25 2013, 2:52 pm

My ds used to do the same thing. What worked for us was to have him sing the words to a tune. He chose a different tune for each page. That kept him happily busy and we didn't get frustrated!

PinkandYellow

Fri, Jan 25 2013, 3:40 pm

my son's bedtime is 8:30, first grade also. when he gets silly I remind him that the longer it takes to do hw the less playing time he'll have. also, we break it up. come home, snack/few minutes play, English hw (which is harder for him), dinner, Hebrew, play time.

chani8

Sat, Jan 26 2013, 1:16 pm

I never do homework with my kids. It is all put 'on their shoulders' and frankly, I don't care if they do it or not. Often, THEY care, so they do it, and so then, the power of bugging mommy by it all, is just not there.

If they need help, I tell them that their teacher should have taught them, and if they can't do it, to tell their teacher it was too hard.

And if it is an extra credit thing, I tell them that they work hard enough, and I don't care if they don't want to do that extra stuff. My kids rarely did the extra (brown nosing stuff), and they survived, self-esteem intact.

And if it was one of those mandatory extra credits, we would fake it. I certainly didn't stand over them to make sure they did it 'correctly'.

granolamom

Sat, Jan 26 2013, 7:18 pm

I agree with you, chani8, but my first graders come home with homework and the requirement is that a parent listens to make sure they are reading correctly. sounds like the OP is talking about that sort of thing. if I knew my kid was able to do it correctly I would sign even if he read the psukim without me.

and I discourage 'extra credit' work too. I never heard of a situation where 'extra credit' actually brought up someone's final grade. and even if it did, who really cares? but the kids get competitive and if their friends do it they want to keep up, which is yet another reason to put an end to it.

and then the kids get older and have 'group projects' for homework. that is probably my least favorite thing.

lk1234

Sat, Jan 26 2013, 8:09 pm

you say that your child knows how to do it well. I would listen to chani8. If there is no problem academically, meaning he is reading and up to par with the class- throw the whole issue of HOMEWORK onto his lap. I just don't do hw with my kids. If they want me to sign the paper then sure I'll sign it and do it with them if I have time. Otherwise, bh, like you I see that my children are doing well, so who cares if they do it or not. What's funny is they drive me nuts to do it, and I have no patience.

Bekitzur- the more you push, the more he'll fight you. Maybe back offf a bit and let the consequences of an unsigned homework be his issue.

This wouldnt work if the kid was having trouble in school. A different solution would be necessary.

gold21

Sat, Jan 26 2013, 9:36 pm

I dont agree with Chani8's approach to homework.

but, just to commiserate, my first grade son also acts silly with his homework sometimes and it really annoys me too!