If you had $20,000 to give to tzedakah, where would it go?

amother

Tue, Feb 15 2011, 10:26 am

Dh's grandmother was niftar recently, and we got some money. DH wants to give 20% which equals about 20K. What would you do with it?

Dh was originally thinking about giving it somewhere that would name something after his grandmother. Now, Dh is thinking about giving it all to bonei olam, to give to an IVF cycle to someone who can't afford it. On the one hand, if it works, it's amazing. On the other hand, if it doesn't, it's literally flushing money down the toilet. WHereas, we could do something less drastic and support a soup kitchen for 4 months. But if it worked, it would be helping to create a world!

To add to all this, I have fertility issues and am coming to the end of my rope with it all.

What would you do? Where would you give the 20K?

saw50st8

Tue, Feb 15 2011, 10:28 am

We gave some money to bikur cholim after the death of each of my grandparents. We wanted to help other sick people. We also donated some money to Shaare Tzedek because that was my grandparents big charity.

Was she "into" a specific charity? Is there something she would really appreciate?

tikva18

Tue, Feb 15 2011, 11:10 am

I would think about what areas I would want to support the most. For me, personally, I'm into supporting kiruv - so I'd look there. I agree, I'd look into what his grandmother would have liked to support.

CatLady

Tue, Feb 15 2011, 11:18 am

For a family donation, it would be in support of research into diabetes or heart disease, which are the illnesses which have affected us directly. If it were my own preference, I'd open a boutique as a recovery program for people with chronic psychiatric illnesses. (I work in mental health, so I've seen first-hand how much of an impact this can make!)

superjew

Tue, Feb 15 2011, 11:25 am

Do you specifically want to donate it all to one organization?
Perhaps you can split it up to a few places you feel 'close' to.
If you're struggling with IF would you not want to donate to a place that helps people like you?
Even though it doesn't help, you can never be sure about these things. Firstly, if you have the right, positive attitude towards the money, then it can bring a positive result. Second, its at least giving a couple the CHANCE & hope.
Again, this is the answer to that specifically. But you can decide to give it to a place where it would be concrete results. Its up to how you feel.
Good Luck with your decision.

skazm

Tue, Feb 15 2011, 11:27 am

easy peazy: http://matanbseterbambi.com - I know that her organization takes no overhead except for accountant, mail, travel and web hosting fees. And I love her dearly, she's my rebbitzen.

http://nevey.org - helped so many girls do teshuva, including me!

http://www.friendsofefrat.org/ - saving Jewish babies

Last edited by skazm on Tue, Feb 15 2011, 11:34 am; edited 1 time in total

skazm

Tue, Feb 15 2011, 11:30 am

there is definitely all kavod in giving bonei olam money, you have to give people a shot whether or not there's a risk the money goes down the drain - then again, the thing with Efrat is these babies would be actually murdered in needless abortions if Efrat didn't do their work... hmmm what a conundrum... but tI bet Hashem will help you...

donating to vaad harabbonim really does work miracles too btw, but I bet Hashem will help you now because you're giving such tzedaka....

Grandmama

Tue, Feb 15 2011, 12:21 pm

I would put the money aside, and start a gmach or other fund in her memory, or think of something new and original to do with the money. I would consider giving maybe $500 to 40 different places rather than give it all away to one place. I would be in no great hurry, rather think carefully and make sure the money is really going to a good cause. IYH being the distributor of this money will surely be a zchus for you too.
May you only have simchas and joy!

sneakermom

Tue, Feb 15 2011, 12:36 pm

Some options:

1. Chinuch - supporting a yeshivah that you feel is worth supporting. This is a great zechus of Torah.
2. Finding a really poor family and sustaining them for awhile, or buying them needed items.
3. Doing the ivf, even if it doesn't work you get the zechus like it did because that is what your intentions were.
4. Fund therapy for someone that really needs it. This is a great chessed if you can arrange something like that.

The list is endless and you get great zchar just putting your mind to it and thinking, trying to figure out how to use the money for good. If your intentions are to do good with the money G-d will lead you to the right place.

hatzlachah!

sky

Tue, Feb 15 2011, 12:37 pm

Money lending g'mach is a good idea as the money gets used over and over again. You can give it to an existing g'mach to handle the overhead.
donate to a school or shul you or her were close to and have something dedicated to her name like a classroom/bimah, etc.

Raisin

Tue, Feb 15 2011, 12:39 pm

after reading all the threads about how people are not having kids because they cannot afford tuition, I would give it to the nearest Day school and ask them to give a scholarship to a needy family.

But of course there are hundreds of needy causes.

amother

Tue, Feb 15 2011, 2:21 pm

I think the Bonei Olam idea is great. Why shouldn't it work? If you donate it to a soup kitchen, in 4 months there will still be starving people. If you donate it to a school for a childs tuition, that child still might end up going off the derech... Why are you looking just at the negative? or of what can go wrong. By the way, it's a big segula for IF couples to support the Torah education of someone else's child. Maybe help out a widow/er?

Here's an idea that I can't see any negative side to: Have a Sefer Torah written in her name? You would be supporting a Sofer Stam...

Posting anon because we also have IF.

sky

Tue, Feb 15 2011, 2:32 pm

amother wrote:

Here's an idea that I can't see any negative side to: Have a Sefer Torah written in her name? You would be supporting a Sofer Stam...

This is a gread idea! How much does it cost to have a sefer torah written?

Balabusta#1

Tue, Feb 15 2011, 2:33 pm

Donating money for a Mikvah is great Sagula I know someone rich who donated money to build Mikvah Tharah in Zachus for couple who didn’t have children the woman gave birth to 9 month later.

amother

Tue, Feb 15 2011, 3:37 pm

Bonei olem is in desperate need of money as I am waiting for funding over 6 month and can’t continue to cycle for that reason. and I am sure I am not the only one waiting for help.

skymile

Tue, Feb 15 2011, 4:15 pm

I think the mikvah thing is a wonderful idea. although putting aside your IF issues I would donate a huge chunk to either RCCS or Chai Lifeline (or split it)

P.S. regarding the IVF that might not work- a) I don't think you would actually find out if it worked or not. b) in the end, it doesn't matter if it works or not- you know that you donated to a worthy cause and who knows more then you that sometimes you need to go through a few cycles of expensive treatments before it works. someone out there is paying for all those unsuccessful treatments. just because it doesn't work out doesn't make it any less of a mitzvah