I am SO proud of DD!

FranticFrummie

Sun, Sep 15 2013, 12:54 am

Just gotta brag a bit. DD is 10yo, but very young for her age, so I tend to worry about her a bit. DH is out of town, so we were on our own.

YK was REALLY hard for me this year. I never fast well, but this year was extra hard because I'm still recovering from a kidney infection. I had a bad migraine, was feeling very faint, slept horribly with terrible nightmares, and kept waking up with panic attacks.

DD woke me up and said she wanted to go to shul, because she just saw some friends walking past our house. I told her that she needed to get dressed right away and try to catch up with them. She has one VERY busy and dangerous road to cross to get to shul, and I told her that no matter what, no matter how long it took, she had to wait until an adult could cross with her.

Without me having to say anything, she put on a white shirt and tights, and a cute pullover dress, with her canvas sneakers. She took off and didn't come back until after havdallah. When she got home she told me who crossed with her on the way, and who she got to walk her back home in the dark. She brought a book and a small toy with her, and even packed a small snack for herself.

I just can't get over how mature and responsible she was! Very Happy

chani8

Sun, Sep 15 2013, 3:25 am

Poor FF, I'm sorry the fast was so hard for you. We had a hard time here too. Your DD was amazing! One of my teens was also amazing and took care of all the little kids, even though she was fasting. These gifts from G-d are what keep me going. Smile

FranticFrummie

Sun, Sep 15 2013, 3:32 am

chani8 wrote:

Thanks Chani. I usually have panic attacks starting a few days before YK and T b'Av, because I know how awful I'm going to feel during the fast. DH won't let me do any of the other fasts during the year.

I don't want DD to have a negative association with fast days. Right now she's going through this "I'm bored!" thing on Shabbos and Yontif when she can't do melacha, and it's worse for her when I'm totally wiped out. As an only child, she just climbs the walls. I am just so grateful that she's getting to the point where I can let her walk a few blocks to a friend's house, fix her own meals, and pick out her own clothes.

Of course I make up for it extra when I'm feeling well, and spend tons of time with her whenever I can. Still, I worry that I'm doing enough for her, ya know?

ima_dina084

Sun, Sep 15 2013, 3:57 am

FranticFrummie wrote:

chani8 wrote:

FF you sound like a great mom , and your dd proves it, I wouldn't worry if I were you!

Isramom8

Sun, Sep 15 2013, 8:31 am

So wonderful about your big girl! Sometimes kids surprise us, at the times we need it most.

What can you do in advance to avoid panicking? Once I really felt that I would dehydrate but it was just panic. Rather than drink, I swished a little mouthwash and it calmed me down.

This year at the last minute before candle lighting I got anxious and flipped off the Shabbos clock so that the air conditioning would be on all Yom Kippur. The ironic thing is that it wasn't even attached to the air conditioning, but to the lights. Whatever, it gave me peace of mind to do it.

Maybe setting up shiurim cups of the right size would reassure you that they are there if you need them?