Ways people made you feel welcomed

amother

Goldenrod

Sun, Mar 24 2019, 6:14 pm

this is a spin off of the other post where the woman told a newcomer she is talking to her BFF (and thus has no interest in her)
what are ways that you welcome or were welcomed in a new community that made you feel accepted and good?

dena613

Sun, Mar 24 2019, 6:21 pm

Inviting us for shabbos meals
Smiling and shmoozing with me
Telling me about community info
Finding friends for my kids- same ages...

(The BFF thread really irked me. I didn't respond because everyone else was doing such a good job.)

ectomorph

Sun, Mar 24 2019, 6:25 pm

dena613 wrote:

Same.

Also one woman told me to call her any questions. I felt like that was such a nice opening to a friendship. We are good friends now.

amother

Seashell

Sun, Mar 24 2019, 6:26 pm

One shul had someone near the door showing you where to get a Chumash and siddur

There was a rebetuzin at a shul who was v good at taking two people who didn't know each other, or didn't know each other well, and saying something like 'shaindy this is bracha. Her father is from Argentina just like your cousin's wife.' or 'shaindy this is bracha, she plays the clarinet, bracha this is shaindy she teaches piano and has just moved here from Texas.' that way you had what to start a conversation with.

Cheiny

Sun, Mar 24 2019, 6:28 pm

amother wrote:

I remember the first time I came to a new Shul and a woman standing outside gave me a big smile and said “Good Shabbos!” That made me feel so welcome already....believe it or not, in my previous neighborhood, no one would answer me on the street when I said “Good Shabbos” first! They’d just look at you funny.

Chayalle

Sun, Mar 24 2019, 7:08 pm

I moved to a new neighborhood last year.

There were several people who sent something over for Shabbos, and that was really nice. But the nicest were all the people who came over to introduce themselves. I was absolutely flabbergasted and touched at how welcoming people were, to me and to my girls.

The very first Shabbos in our new home, there was a knock on the door, and a group of little girls my DD's age were standing there, inviting her to come play. (kids learn these things from their parents, you know?)

Teens my older DD's age came over to introduce themselves.

In shul, we were all made to feel welcome, from the Rebbetzin to everyone else who said hello. I couldn't get over how many people came over to welcome us.

The Rabbi and so many others made DH feel welcome, let him know times for the shiur, etc...he quickly became part of it.

This neighborhood gets an A+. Thank you all, if anyone is on here. It made our move so much easier. No second-guessing.

OutATowner

Sun, Mar 24 2019, 7:21 pm

BH I live in a very welcoming community. At this point I am the "old timer." When I find out someone is moving here I call them before they move and introduce myself and ask if they have any questions about anything. Someone told me it made the move so much easier and she was so touched, so I try to do it for anyone moving in. She has made many friends bH, but will call me for questions about where to go, what dentist to use, etc. I'm so happy people feel comfortable asking. I also try to connect them with others, like, "oh, Leah knows a good dentist, I'll tell her to call you."
The next thing I'm going to share may sound weird to some people, but to me it was so helpful. I moved from E"Y with a baby. This person made a wic appointment for me for shortly after we came, because it would have been a 2 month wait and she knew I didn't have a job yet (small oot kollel). I didn't even know what wic was. She said I could cancel if I wanted to but I this way I had the option. It was such a huge help!

iyar

Sun, Mar 24 2019, 7:25 pm

amother wrote:

When someone approached me first to introduce herself, instead of me taking that first step.

Same here.
Just smile and say Hi and welcome, or Good Shabbos.
Fruit platters and chocolate chip cookies optional, and not really necessary.
(That other thread was appalling.)

amother

Blonde

Sun, Mar 24 2019, 7:28 pm

Chayalle wrote:

What area do you live in?

amother

Teal

Sun, Mar 24 2019, 7:56 pm

When we first moved to a new community, we got 3 cheesecakes the first shabbos! And my neighbors girls watched my babies so we can unpack.
Shabbos at shul when the rebbetzin saw me walk in, she got up and made sure I had a good place to sit. She even offered to go bring me a comfortable chair from her house so I shouldn't have to sit on the bench.
Bh its been afew years and the Rebbetzins kindness to everyone is still ongoing and we bh love love our neighborhood. There will be obnoxious and rude people in every neighborhood, I just stay away from them.

amother

Mustard

Sun, Mar 24 2019, 8:03 pm

A few established members of the community made a point of inviting newcomers for Shabbat lunch. Not only were they not threatened by our presence (yes, that's a thing) it gave the newbies a chance to meet each other.

forever21

Sun, Mar 24 2019, 8:15 pm

1. Inviting for Shabbos meals
2. If you have young kids the same age then inviting the kids over to play on Shabbos afternoon
Also , I’d like to add to those that said to bring something over like a fruit platter or something . It’s a nice thing to do but it’s nicer when you yourself bring it over rather than sending one of your kids .

amother

Bisque

Sun, Mar 24 2019, 10:53 pm

I live in a really nice neighborhood in Jackson. Everyone is so welcoming and friendly. The kids all played together right away, and to this day a few years later, all the kids on the block play together, ranging from JPF to chassidish. I can’t think of a specific thing, but it’s just such a nice welcoming block. Everyone is friends. No politics, at least among the women. I can’t even imagine living in areas that other posters describe.

amother

Firebrick

Sun, Mar 24 2019, 10:55 pm

I've moved 7 times in 9 years. I always think its a milestone when a neighbor asks to borrow something. makes me feel like I belong.
same with neighbors allowing their kids to come play at my house.
its sort of the opposite of giving, but it feels like giving.

amother

Papaya

Mon, Mar 25 2019, 1:10 am

Here's what I posted in the other thread.

One of the most welcoming gestures I ever saw was in a shul we went to once while on vacation. The announcements after davening included who was sponsoring the kiddush, along with this line: "You'll notice that we have plain white plastic cups and some red ones. If you are new here, please take a red cup. That way, people will be able to come over and greet our newcomers. We don't want to miss anyone."

When we moved into our first house, a neighbor came over with a list of phone numbers for everything in the neighborhood, from the pediatrician to a locksmith to the mikvah. It was so thoughtful!

amother

Mauve

Mon, Mar 25 2019, 1:26 am

In my community the woman don't go to shul every week only on Tom tov. There is no welcoming going on. It's in Lakewood. New families move in every day. I don't even know all my neighbors.
How should we be welcoming neighbors when new ones move in every day and we don't even know when they move in? In the summer we sit out a lot and shmooze so then if I see someone new sitting in the circle I would introduce myself. The second place we get to shmooze is on the shuttle. I just met a neighbor (that lived across from me for 7 months) for the first time on the shuttle.

amother

Papaya

Mon, Mar 25 2019, 3:42 am

amother wrote:

How should we be welcoming neighbors when new ones move in every day and we don't even know when they move in?

Don't you see the moving van?

Why not host an event for women on the block, just to get to know each other?