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Forum
-> Inquiries & Offers
-> New York related Inquiries
amother
OP
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Mon, Jul 08 2019, 6:09 pm
We are looking for a new neighborhood to relocate. We were on central avenue, eating in pizza store and getting a feel for the area, and overheard conversations such as this which made me hesitate and get turned off.
First woman: Hi, haven’t seen you in a while.
Second woman: oh we just got back from our cruise.
First woman: oh we just went to the Bahamas...
And this went on and on. Other conversations when we were there for Shabbos centered around designer name skirts, the exotic flowers in the $150 Shabbos flower bouquet. Are most of the people so materialistic and showy?
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Einikel
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Mon, Jul 08 2019, 6:11 pm
Pls change the thread title. It just sounds very condescending.
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amother
Jetblack
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Mon, Jul 08 2019, 6:14 pm
I ate with a friend at an upscale place in the 5 towns the two mothers sitting near by let the 3 year old and four year olds kids run around with forks in their hands ,
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amother
White
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Mon, Jul 08 2019, 6:15 pm
my friend moved to the 5 towns. she said there are definitely the fancy type but there are also the not as fancy type. Where in the five towns are you looking, different neighborhoods are also different.
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amother
OP
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Mon, Jul 08 2019, 6:16 pm
Einikel wrote: | Pls change the thread title. It just sounds very condescending. |
It’s a question. A question isn’t condescending. I’m trying to get opinions.
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ectomorph
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Mon, Jul 08 2019, 6:21 pm
I mean it would be lashon hara for anyone to agree with your op. Are you trying to elicit lashon hara?
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amother
cornflower
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Mon, Jul 08 2019, 6:22 pm
ectomorph wrote: | I mean it would be lashon hara for anyone to agree with your op. Are you trying to elicit lashon hara? |
Yes, it's loshon harah as long as it's not about Lakewood .
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ectomorph
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Mon, Jul 08 2019, 6:23 pm
amother [ cornflower ] wrote: | Yes, it's loshon harah as long as it's not about Lakewood . |
The op would be lashon hara about lakewood too. Or any place
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amother
Babypink
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Mon, Jul 08 2019, 6:24 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote: | We are looking for a new neighborhood to relocate. We were on central avenue, eating in pizza store and getting a feel for the area, and overheard conversations such as this which made me hesitate and get turned off.
First woman: Hi, haven’t seen you in a while.
Second woman: oh we just got back from our cruise.
First woman: oh we just went to the Bahamas...
And this went on and on. Other conversations when we were there for Shabbos centered around designer name skirts, the exotic flowers in the $150 Shabbos flower bouquet. Are most of the people so materialistic and showy? |
Yes.
But that happens in some other materialistic frum areas too.
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Einikel
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Mon, Jul 08 2019, 6:26 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote: | It’s a question. A question isn’t condescending. I’m trying to get opinions. |
You can just phrase your question differently
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amother
cornflower
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Mon, Jul 08 2019, 6:27 pm
ectomorph wrote: | I mean it would be lashon hara for anyone to agree with your op. Are you trying to elicit lashon hara? |
Considering that there are endless amounts of threads bashing Lakewood....
Sure could have fooled me.
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ectomorph
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Mon, Jul 08 2019, 6:59 pm
It's lashon hara to bash Lakewood as well.
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amother
Purple
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Mon, Jul 08 2019, 7:08 pm
I don't think the conversation you overheard was bad. It could be you don't want to have neighbors who do things you can't afford but that's a different story. Many people who live there are rich so they do rich people things. And they usually have rich friends. It's no different than a conversation 2 women may have in the park after bein hazmanim where one went to Lancaster and one to NH. It's just on a much smaller scale because they have less money...
The (wealthy) people I know in the five towns are not competitve they just live a very different lifestyle than me.
That being said you can find PLENTY people not like that just make sure to move to the right neighborhood.
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amother
Ruby
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Mon, Jul 08 2019, 7:10 pm
The title is lashon hara/ motzi shem ra and even phrasing it differently would probably be avak LH/ rechilus. I have no skin in the game and live nowhere near there, but this is the truth.
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amother
Puce
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Mon, Jul 08 2019, 7:14 pm
The Five Towns has a reputation for a reason. Lived there for three years, those were most miserable three years of my life. If you're already concerned about those things, it doesn't sound like it's for you.
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amother
Apricot
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Mon, Jul 08 2019, 7:21 pm
Plenty like that and plenty not like that. If you fit in financially, this shouldn't affect you. you'll just find your own type of friends. If you are " the poor one" then it will stress you out.
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amother
Periwinkle
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Mon, Jul 08 2019, 7:33 pm
Hi. I lived there for close to 20 yrs before retiring to Florida. I am soooo not materialistic and have no clue or desire to dress upscale etc. I made some really great friends in the 5 towns whom I am still in touch. Some of these woman are not at all well off financially and some are. I know that there are some really down to earth young families in Cedarhurst. The people who bought our small woodmere house have not done a thing to it though it can use a painting. There are so many types that You find your own. Lawrence homes are more expensive for the most part but I also have some well to do very down to earth and not judgemental lawrence friends. There are so many shuls to choose from as well
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PinkFridge
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Mon, Jul 08 2019, 7:40 pm
OP, I appreciate need for information but I opened this thread with the express intent to report it. I don't know how you can get the info you need but this thread is not it.
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amother
Cerise
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Mon, Jul 08 2019, 7:45 pm
How
Does one get a thread shut down ? This is total lashon hara
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