Vent about being fat and binging

cookiewriter

Thu, Jan 16 2020, 10:21 pm

I just wanna scream. I’ve been dieting since my teens and I am fatter than ever (5 kids). I feel zero motivation and I hate looking in the mirror. I love fashion and wigs and makeup and jewelry but then I see a photo of myself and I feel sick. Every day I wanna start Anew but just end up binging/ eating junk, then feeling soooo exhausted from the junk, then repeat. Argh. I can’t take it anymore. I’ve tried davening Segulas TZedaka Lashon hara no tv and obviously nutritionists coaches etc. What the heck is wrong with me
Thanks Banging head

cookiewriter

Thu, Jan 16 2020, 10:23 pm

Op again. If you’re naturally skinny and never think about weight calories fat etc. Please explain HOW. I would consider it the greatest Chesed. And what DO you eat. And don’t answer if you’re one of these crazy conscious people who weigh and measure every bite and only eat non processed foods, because that’s not a way for me to live. It triggers binges instantly

cookiewriter

Thu, Jan 16 2020, 10:24 pm

I’ve done therapy. To sum it up: at the moment where you’re about to eat something you shouldn’t, check in with yourself, let the urges pass bla bla bla. Guess what. By then I’m halfway through (insert nosh here)

amother

Slategray

Thu, Jan 16 2020, 10:28 pm

Just want to commiserate. In the same boat. Spending tons to go to nutritionist weekly. Treading and barely make progress. I look fat and disgusting.

amother

Cobalt

Thu, Jan 16 2020, 10:29 pm

I know exactly how you feel!
I’ve been struggling for years with weight too Sad

After trying and doing so many different diets and coaches, losing weight and gaining it back...

I am finally seriously considering weight loss surgery. I just can’t do this anymore.

I really feel for you - would you consider it?
I just want to be done with this constant struggle and that’s why I’m considering it.

Malkqueen

Thu, Jan 16 2020, 10:29 pm

I read a tip recently (maybe even here on imamother?) that's been working for me. Whenever I want to binge on something, I tell myself - no problem, but in five minutes. Usually five minutes later the urge has passed.
I also find that when I am well-hydrated, I tend to be better at self-control.

cookiewriter

Thu, Jan 16 2020, 10:37 pm

Op here . For sure hydration makes a huge difference when I’m good thanks for the reminder. About the waiting five mins to binge- again - by the time I’m aware enough to think that I’m already eating. Also by then I’ve already eaten junk so I may as well continue that day. Surgery- won’t help me I’ve been told, as I’ll just binge my way back to fat again

amother

Ivory

Thu, Jan 16 2020, 10:40 pm

The problem is all the self judgement. It is very very hard to lose weight. Start with small changes op.

Right now, I’m focusing on guarding my health and claiming back my energy. Exercising 20 minutes a day and Adding more veggies to the menu. Little by little,if not your body will fight back.

avrahamama

Thu, Jan 16 2020, 10:44 pm

So I haven't done this in a while. But it worked for me. Eat meat or chicken in the morning. It's filling it's protein and it's fleishig so I can't go to all the chocolate bars or pizza or dairy treats that are my weakness. If I do that and keep chips or fries out if the house. It helps with self control. It's funny how not wanting to disappoint Hashem and eat dairy too soon after meat is a higher priority than not disappointing Hashem with my actual dietary habits.

amother

Wine

Thu, Jan 16 2020, 10:44 pm

cookiewriter wrote:

Metabolism
Great self confidence (I should probably care about this new baby pooch but just decided not to)
Great fasting ability
Too lazy to cook to eat
There's no one secret...sorry... Also for health reasons I'm supposed to be on a rlly limited diet and I wish I could just eat bread again.
The flip side has its own issues with food. I never have enough in the house. Dh always complains there's. Nothing good to eat. Idk how to keep pantry stocked. I'd rather starve than deal with it all.

amother

Wine

Thu, Jan 16 2020, 10:47 pm

cookiewriter wrote:

I share this so much irl. I learned the most amazing Ramban or something in high school about leket and peah. They're next to each to teach: leket - if you've already gathered so many sins don't think you should just keep doing so bc why not. Peah - leave a corner. Leave some. You're never too far gone. There's no such thing as "may as well keep on" you can always stop and leave. (the meforash concludes with an absolutely amazing insight into olam haba and a key to the door, I don't rmmbr)

Chana Miriam S

Thu, Jan 16 2020, 10:47 pm

I used to feel like that. Remarkably I made it through a couple of days very low carb and suddenly the craving was removed. The longer I do it, the less I want anything I shouldn’t. The sugar, the grains, the starches, the fruit, they made me crazy. I could not stop eating. Now, the [...] committee in my head is quiet because I know I’m doing my best every single day. I stay on my derech so I never have to get back on. And I’m profoundly grateful for the peace. Top weight 315 height 5 foot . Loss about a hundred pounds in almost three years. But STABLE. Not diabetic. Feel amazing. It is what worked for me.

amother

Lawngreen

Thu, Jan 16 2020, 11:08 pm

cookiewriter wrote:

But how they are has zero relevance to you because they don’t have struggles with food! The only thing that really helped me was being on a high protein, high fat, low carb diet. It kills cravings and hunger, the only carbs you should be eating are veggies. All bread, pasta, rice, potatoes, etc. increase hunger and give you cravings. Also try to do some exercise.

amother

Lawngreen

Thu, Jan 16 2020, 11:09 pm

cookiewriter wrote:

I found therapy does not help with this. I understand all the psychology about overeating and the root causes, but it doesn’t help at all when a craving strikes.