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I hate the newborn stage :(
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amother




OP
 

Post  Thu, Jun 11 2020, 2:41 pm
My adorable baby is 2 weeks old b”h and boy! I am so so overwhelmed. I find myself hard to relax and enjoy this stage because I get so anxious when my baby cries. Even once she’s finally asleep I can’t bring myself to relax because I worry if she’ll wake up and I’ll have to deal with the crying yet again.

I am feeling so miserable about this and every day is a hurdle for itself. I feel like I want to go to sleep and wake up when she’s a 3 month old.

If anyone has some practical tips on how to change my mindset or how to deal with anxiety or stam chizuck...I need some help ladies!
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amother




Lemon
 

Post  Thu, Jun 11 2020, 2:44 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
My adorable baby is 2 weeks old b”h and boy! I am so so overwhelmed. I find myself hard to relax and enjoy this stage because I get so anxious when my baby cries. Even once she’s finally asleep I can’t bring myself to relax because I worry if she’ll wake up and I’ll have to deal with the crying yet again.

I am feeling so miserable about this and every day is a hurdle for itself. I feel like I want to go to sleep and wake up when she’s a 3 month old.

If anyone has some practical tips on how to change my mindset or how to deal with anxiety or stam chizuck...I need some help ladies!


Is she your first? I remember feeling like that. And then one day my baby slept through the night and I kept waking up because I was so worried. It passes and it gets easier. It’s so hard in the beginning. If you have anyone who can help be on call so you can relax or nap while she sleeps, take advantage.
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Success10




 
 
 
 

Post  Thu, Jun 11 2020, 2:45 pm
It sounds like it's not your first newborn. I can just say that 2 weeks after birth there are still tons of crazy hormones running through you making you nervous and nuts. Lack of sleep also causes a certain madness. Try to get as much sleep as possible, maybe make sure someone else is "on duty" for at least a little bit of the day. And remind yourself that this stage passes very, very quickly. You'll be much more relaxed in a few weeks. And if you are not, you should speak to a doctor or someone wise that you often confide in. Snuggle your newborn and enjoy every minute.
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amother




Denim
 

Post  Thu, Jun 11 2020, 2:46 pm
I find the newborn stage VERY difficult. The lack of sleep really does me in. Know that it iyH will pass soon, and take as much help as you can get.
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amother




Wine
 

Post  Thu, Jun 11 2020, 2:52 pm
Honestly, I also hate the newborn stage. I found every day is soooo long, but the week's aren't as long. Somehow you turn around and weeks have gone by.
Is there a specific reason why the baby should be waking up? Is there a way to put her to sleep and then move away from her so you're not hearing every change in breathing etc-like putting her to sleep in her stroller in the dining room and you being in your bedroom. I always found I slept badly when my baby was next to me.
I definitely remember the days when every moment felt like eternity.
Just remind yourself, this too shall pass. Just take it day by day-try and get sleep and generally take it easy. 2 weeks is still very early. You will feel better soon hopefully.
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amother




OP
 

Post  Thu, Jun 11 2020, 3:08 pm
Success10 wrote:
It sounds like it's not your first newborn. I can just say that 2 weeks after birth there are still tons of crazy hormones running through you making you nervous and nuts. Lack of sleep also causes a certain madness. Try to get as much sleep as possible, maybe make sure someone else is "on duty" for at least a little bit of the day. And remind yourself that this stage passes very, very quickly. You'll be much more relaxed in a few weeks. And if you are not, you should speak to a doctor or someone wise that you often confide in. Snuggle your newborn and enjoy every minute.


Right, she is my third. I have hired a night nurse so that really helps to catch up on sleep. Tysm for your support
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amother




Cerulean
 

Post  Thu, Jun 11 2020, 3:13 pm
I’m with you.... when people told me to “enjoy this stage cuz it passes so fast“ I would always say “I wish it would pass faster”. My newborns were never easy. At a few days old I would wait for 6 weeks when I can go out to work and get a “break”, at 6 weeks I would wait for 3 months till the baby can hold their head and play more, at 3 months I couldn’t wait for 6 months when they would crawl, then walk, than talk etc. My husband wants a baby born at 18 months! I wish!
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amother




OP
 

Post  Thu, Jun 11 2020, 3:49 pm
amother [ Wine ] wrote:
Honestly, I also hate the newborn stage. I found every day is soooo long, but the week's aren't as long. Somehow you turn around and weeks have gone by.
Is there a specific reason why the baby should be waking up? Is there a way to put her to sleep and then move away from her so you're not hearing every change in breathing etc-like putting her to sleep in her stroller in the dining room and you being in your bedroom. I always found I slept badly when my baby was next to me.
I definitely remember the days when every moment felt like eternity.
Just remind yourself, this too shall pass. Just take it day by day-try and get sleep and generally take it easy. 2 weeks is still very early. You will feel better soon hopefully.


Yes the days are endless! The hardest is the putting to sleep because she wakes up every time her pacifier falls out, that’s why I’m having anxiety every time she gives a kvetch
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silverlining3




 
 
 
 

Post  Thu, Jun 11 2020, 3:52 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
My adorable baby is 2 weeks old b”h and boy! I am so so overwhelmed. I find myself hard to relax and enjoy this stage because I get so anxious when my baby cries. Even once she’s finally asleep I can’t bring myself to relax because I worry if she’ll wake up and I’ll have to deal with the crying yet again.

I am feeling so miserable about this and every day is a hurdle for itself. I feel like I want to go to sleep and wake up when she’s a 3 month old.

If anyone has some practical tips on how to change my mindset or how to deal with anxiety or stam chizuck...I need some help ladies!


Rule of thumb: Sleep when baby sleeps
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amother




OP
 

Post  Thu, Jun 11 2020, 3:53 pm
amother [ Cerulean ] wrote:
I’m with you.... when people told me to “enjoy this stage cuz it passes so fast“ I would always say “I wish it would pass faster”. My newborns were never easy. At a few days old I would wait for 6 weeks when I can go out to work and get a “break”, at 6 weeks I would wait for 3 months till the baby can hold their head and play more, at 3 months I couldn’t wait for 6 months when they would crawl, then walk, than talk etc. My husband wants a baby born at 18 months! I wish!


#I-can-so-relate
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jetset123




 
 
 
 

Post  Thu, Jun 11 2020, 3:54 pm
I gave all my babies gerber soothe probiotic drops and it made them so relaxed and sleep way better ane less colic
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silverlining3




 
 
 
 

Post  Thu, Jun 11 2020, 3:55 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
Right, she is my third. I have hired a night nurse so that really helps to catch up on sleep. Tysm for your support


I can relate. My 3rd baby newborn stage was hardest. Never until my 3rd had I woken my husband during night to watch baby or for help with other kid, if woke. I simply couldn't. Even for 15 min, just to close my eyes, while hub took charge made such a difference.
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amother




Blush
 

Post  Thu, Jun 11 2020, 3:57 pm
Im so happy im not the only one. My baby turned 6 months a week or so ago and for the 1st time in 6 months I can spend 30 mins making dinner without stopping 10 times. Yes I know I can make dinner in 2 mins but my kids enjoy shnitzel once a week and cant make shabbos in 2 mins either...
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amother




OP
 

Post  Thu, Jun 11 2020, 3:59 pm
jetset123 wrote:
I gave all my babies gerber soothe probiotic drops and it made them so relaxed and sleep way better ane less colic


Thanks, will look into it.
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amother




Natural
 

Post  Thu, Jun 11 2020, 4:02 pm
Change your expectations. Dont wait till they get older. Thst killing time. Get books to read wile nursing, things to listen to while rocking. Make the most of it.

Validation piece. Me personally can't handle lack of sleep and might just mitt have any more
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Ora in town




 
 
 
 

Post  Thu, Jun 11 2020, 4:05 pm
Self-hypnosis...
when child cries
so that it will pierce you less...

The technique for self-hypnosis I learned works like this...

sit comfortably
look at something in front of you.

see 3 things (your point & two other things in peripheral view)
Hear 3 things (your baby cry plus tow other things)
Feel three things (your behind on the chair, your hand on your lap, the temperature of the room)
Take 3 deep breaths

see 2 things
hear 2 things
feel two things
take 2 deep breaths

see 1 thing
hear 1 thng
feel one thing
take one deep breath...

I can't tell you exactly how long it takes... perhaps 20-30seconds, if you want you can spread it out even a few minutes (obviously not when your baby needs you).

If it is too long (when the baby cries, before you pick the baby up), you could either just do the first one.
Or you could just focus on the hearing aspect:
Hear 3 things (2 things besides your baby crying)
(feel 3 things)
take 3 deep breahts

Baby crying in designed to pierce our ears. But you are here. So it might help to also focusing on other accustic signals, besides the baby crying... so that it will stress you less...

But take a moment of pause before you pick the baby up...
Just don't go along with baby's stress...
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amother




OP
 

Post  Thu, Jun 11 2020, 4:23 pm
Ora in town wrote:
Self-hypnosis...
when child cries
so that it will pierce you less...

The technique for self-hypnosis I learned works like this...

sit comfortably
look at something in front of you.

see 3 things (your point & two other things in peripheral view)
Hear 3 things (your baby cry plus tow other things)
Feel three things (your behind on the chair, your hand on your lap, the temperature of the room)
Take 3 deep breaths

see 2 things
hear 2 things
feel two things
take 2 deep breaths

see 1 thing
hear 1 thng
feel one thing
take one deep breath...

I can't tell you exactly how long it takes... perhaps 20-30seconds, if you want you can spread it out even a few minutes (obviously not when your baby needs you).

If it is too long (when the baby cries, before you pick the baby up), you could either just do the first one.
Or you could just focus on the hearing aspect:
Hear 3 things (2 things besides your baby crying)
(feel 3 things)
take 3 deep breahts

Baby crying in designed to pierce our ears. But you are here. So it might help to also focusing on other accustic signals, besides the baby crying... so that it will stress you less...

But take a moment of pause before you pick the baby up...
Just don't go along with baby's stress...


Interesting! I will definitely try to practice this. Thank you
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amother




OP
 

Post  Thu, Jun 11 2020, 4:30 pm
amother [ Natural ] wrote:
Change your expectations. Dont wait till they get older. Thst killing time. Get books to read wile nursing, things to listen to while rocking. Make the most of it.

Validation piece. Me personally can't handle lack of sleep and might just mitt have any more


I actually love nursing my baby, it’s the only time I can relax because she is not crying. Aside for then she is mostly fussy
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cbsp




 
 
 
 

Post  Thu, Jun 11 2020, 4:39 pm
Mazal Tov!

Interestingly enough I received this from Aish today:

My Hillel Moment
Jun 7, 2020 | by Sara Silver

https://www.aish.com/f/hotm/My......html

Not your situation exactly but maybe it can help you reframe?
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amother




Lilac
 

Post  Thu, Jun 11 2020, 4:41 pm
I felt the same way and I had postpartum anxiety.
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