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Forum -> Parenting our children

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amother

Mon, Aug 16 2021, 9:22 am

Go ahead, I'll try to answer.

I'm not in the USA but I believe that policies in most Western countries are similar.

hodeez

Mon, Aug 16 2021, 9:23 am

What was the worst case you were ever involved in?

Success10

Mon, Aug 16 2021, 9:24 am

In what percentage of cases is the child/children actually removed from the home? Of those cases, how often is it permanent?

tigerwife

Mon, Aug 16 2021, 9:25 am

What is the red line that results in removing children from a home? Does this ever happen if there is no abuse involved?

exaustedmom

Mon, Aug 16 2021, 9:26 am

What are some success stories?

amother

Natural

Mon, Aug 16 2021, 9:26 am

Do you ever feel conflicted because of halacha?

amother

Sunflower

Mon, Aug 16 2021, 9:28 am

Just wanted to say hi to a colleague. I’m a pediatric hospital social (in the US tho) and often have collaboration with child protection. Your work is so hard!! How do you take care of yourself given all the abuse and neglect that you see?

keym

Mon, Aug 16 2021, 9:30 am

How often do you get "litigious" or not real concerning calls or reports versus real concerns.

Rappel

Mon, Aug 16 2021, 9:31 am

If a case does reach the point where children need to move to foster care -- What percentage of families successfully turn their lives around and reunite? What helps them make it?

What do you look for in a family whom want to foster?

What are the factors which make a foster situation most successful?

amother

Mon, Aug 16 2021, 9:31 am

hodeez wrote:

What was the worst case you were ever involved in?

The worst case was probably the removal from the home of 2 severely neglected small children. Horrific circumstances. Parental rights were suspended and children placed with relatives.

amother

Mon, Aug 16 2021, 9:36 am

Success10 wrote:

In what percentage of cases is the child/children actually removed from the home? Of those cases, how often is it permanent?

Children are removed very infrequently. In fact hardly ever. There really have to be very extreme circumstances. Severe abuse or neglect. For the most part we work towards assisting the parents or guardians to do better and provide better. Sometimes, its material assistance (through state apparatuses) or helping them get sober, or teaching them better coping and parenting skills.

The courts in my country are very reluctant to sever parental rights and responsibilities so if children are removed its almost always a temporary order, and the social workers are tasked with reunifying the family. Sometimes the parents can't get it together and children age out of foster care but their rights are never permanently severed.

amother

Mon, Aug 16 2021, 9:37 am

tigerwife wrote:

What is the red line that results in removing children from a home? Does this ever happen if there is no abuse involved?

I would remove if there is immediate risk of physical or s-xual abuse, including severe neglect.

amother

Mon, Aug 16 2021, 9:40 am

exaustedmom wrote:

What are some success stories?

I've had a pretty long career so there have been many BH. Most cases, believe it or not, I would consider successful. In most of the cases I get involved in the parents want to hold on to their kids and want to improve the situation so they try hard. Even just the threat of going to court is enough to get them to make major changes in how they parent. The ones that are not successful are usually where there is significant drug and alcohol abuse and the parent just cannot get themselves clean. Its sad but in most cases they really love their kids but have so many of their own demons that they can't get it together.

amother

Mon, Aug 16 2021, 9:41 am

amother [ Natural ] wrote:

Do you ever feel conflicted because of halacha?

Not sure what halacha you're referring to? Please elaborate.

amother

Mon, Aug 16 2021, 9:42 am

amother [ Sunflower ] wrote:

Hi colleague!

Its hard emotionally but I've learnt over the years to have iron-cast boundaries - once I leave work I put everything out of my mind so I can focus on my family and myself. Its definitely a skill that I've had to develop.

amother

Mon, Aug 16 2021, 9:44 am

keym wrote:

How often do you get "litigious" or not real concerning calls or reports versus real concerns.

I am not an intake worker, so once I get involved there is an established need for further intervention. My agency takes every report seriously though.

amother

Mon, Aug 16 2021, 9:49 am

Rappel wrote:

Great questions.

As I said in a previous post, in my country it is extremely difficult to sever the parents natural rights and the court is very reluctant to do so. So the case almost always becomes one of reunification between the parents and child. Obviously I don't have any hard statistics but I would say that in my experience most of the families are ultimately reunited. Possibly more than half in fact.

I am not involved in screening or appointing foster families so I'm not sure what criteria are used.

Foster situations are probably most successful when the foster families make the birth parents part of the process and include them in the day-to-day parenting of the children and become role models for the birth parent (where possible of course. Obviously there are many situations that would preclude this).

dankbar

Mon, Aug 16 2021, 10:37 am

Do you regard Jewish cases differently? Do you ever see hospitals that try to charge child abuse faster for Jewish parents based on discrimination rather than episode?

amother

Mon, Aug 16 2021, 10:50 am

dankbar wrote:

Do you regard Jewish cases differently? Do you ever see hospitals that try to charge child abuse faster for Jewish parents based on discrimination rather than episode?

No to both questions

amother

Sunflower

Mon, Aug 16 2021, 10:51 am

dankbar wrote:

Do you regard Jewish cases differently? Do you ever see hospitals that try to charge child abuse faster for Jewish parents based on discrimination rather than episode?

I work in major NYC children’s hospital with lots and lots of frum families and have never seen what you’re referring to.

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