Vent: Being thin isn't everything!!

amother

Thu, Feb 17 2022, 5:41 pm

Just because I'm thin doesn't mean I can just put on anything from the store and it looks amazing on me!! PSA I do have baby fat and I do have wider hips that I'm not used to having. For something to look good on me I need to go to a store and try on at least 10 things.
Last year I tried on literally every shabbos robe in the store till I liked what I saw.
So please don't say "oh your so skinny you look stunning in anything you put on"
It's hard for me too!!

amother

Honeydew

Thu, Feb 17 2022, 5:46 pm

It’s still easier than having baby fat and wide hips on top of being plain old fat…. I haven’t looked decent since my last birth. I can try on 300 things and walk out with nothing.

lamplighter

Thu, Feb 17 2022, 6:20 pm

How many times do fat people not even have anything to try on? Forget about "looks good". Many fat people buy whatever fits and don't get to decide what looks good.

amother

Lightcoral

Thu, Feb 17 2022, 6:25 pm

I felt so dumb when I ran into a skinny friend when I was shopping. She was trying on one thing after another, each looked more beautiful on her than the next, and somehow she found something to complain about on every last one. While I had three things I could try and I took whichever one looked at least somewhat passable...

Last edited by amother on Thu, Feb 17 2022, 6:29 pm; edited 1 time in total

amother

Charcoal

Thu, Feb 17 2022, 6:27 pm

Everyone is entitled to their body image issues but I cannot find more than 3 black, massively overpriced options to try. And I am happy if they zip shut. I would love to have more options. But they don't exist. Unless you consider potato sacks or garbage bags options.

amother

Thu, Feb 17 2022, 6:32 pm

werty wrote:

Is the store drama that I read about in mishpacha a real thing ? Is it successful ? Sounds like a great contributions what I read.

What store drama in the mishpacha?

amother

Thu, Feb 17 2022, 6:36 pm

amother [ Lightcoral ] wrote:

I wish I didn't have what to complain about. Some people complain when really they are just hungry for compliments. My behind sticks out in a not nice way. Many things made for skinny people are also pretty narrow and my hips stick out so the skirt becomes too tight. You can dream to be like someone else but not necessarily do they have it easier

bsy

Thu, Feb 17 2022, 6:39 pm

werty wrote:

Is the store drama that I read about in mishpacha a real thing ? Is it successful ? Sounds like a great contributions what I read.

It is a real store. Not sure how successful but it sounds like it. It's still pretty new

amother

Lightblue

Thu, Feb 17 2022, 6:55 pm

bsy wrote:

It is a real store. Not sure how successful but it sounds like it. It's still pretty new

I went to Drama a couple of months ago. The saleswoman was very sweet and helpful and not pushy at all. I bought a one dress that still needed alterations because I'm short as well as plus size.

Most of their clothing didn't suit my body shape, which at the moment looks like I'm 6 months pregnant even though my youngest is 3 years old. I would still go back because I liked a few of their styles so I might get lucky next time.

amother

Lightblue

Thu, Feb 17 2022, 7:00 pm

lamplighter wrote:

How many times do fat people not even have anything to try on? Forget about "looks good". Many fat people buy whatever fits and don't get to decide what looks good.

Exactly. I'm currently wearing a camouflage top even though I usually can't stand the look. But I needed a mid weight shirt that looked decent on me and this shirt has a button on the top and then it's open and flowy below that so it camouflages my stomach (see what I did there?) and I can wear it over a black shell and black skirt that I already owned. It didn't come in any other colors but I bought it even though I don't particularly love it because it was the best I could do.

amother

Sienna

Thu, Feb 17 2022, 7:02 pm

Sorry OP but I don’t have so much rachmanus on you.
I believe you when you say not everything looks good on you. Big deal.
I had stomach surgery and I’M STILL FAT and lucky if the biggest size in the store fits me, let alone looks good. I don’t get to try on ten things.
I just have to buy the least of all evil.
And I would have a hard time believing that most things don’t look good on you anyway. It’s probably your perception.
I don’t mean to be mean…
It’s just that people who struggle so hard with their weight don’t have much room left over to feel bad for skinny people whose bodies aren’t perfect.
It’s kind of like complaining to someone with infertility about how hard your kids are.

causemommysaid

Thu, Feb 17 2022, 7:15 pm

OP I am trying to be nice to you but you are really talking like someone who doesn't have a clue.

You have no idea what being fat feels like and how hard it is to shop. Not an inkling of how awful it feels.

I have been very thin, thin, average, overweight, fat, and very fat.

When I am average and below, shopping takes time and not everything looks great on me. When I am overweight and above shopping is an exercise in futility. It is painful, humiliating, and sad. I would walk out of a store depressed and empty handed and hating myself.

Please please please thank hashem that you are naturally thin and have this bracha. You have no clue how hard it is to be overweight.

As much as everyone has a right to complain and feel what they feel, I really think those who are blessed in this regard should make an effort to focus on what they have.

Currently I am not fat and I feel so blessed to be able to shop normally. I remember what shopping when fat feels like and wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy.

amother

Thu, Feb 17 2022, 7:17 pm

amother [ Ruby ] wrote:

When I was thinner I was 2 different sizes because my hips were a size bigger. That can make shopping hard for someone. So OP, genuine hugs!

Thanks so much!!

amother

Whitewash

Thu, Feb 17 2022, 7:19 pm

lucky14 wrote:

Just echoing what everyone else is saying… at least you can find something in the end.

Not always. I'm super skinny too and I cant find anything that fits . Everything just hangs, looks shleppy and huge . I cant wear anything with darts either because I'm so skinny and practically flat on top . It's not easy to find clothes when you're so skinny .things just hang and dont look good . I'd much rather be fatter and with curves . I dont fit into anything just like someone overweight that cant fit into things.