How to make it out of this month alive!

amother

Alyssum

Thu, May 26 2022, 11:13 pm

amother [ Dahlia ] wrote:

It's just so crazy that after years of hard work in school and 90k in loans OP cannot even make it financially. Crazy to drop a degree so soon after graduating. It's not like, oh I by mistake bought a rotten apple so I'm gonna throw it out. It's a 90k degree!!! if only she (and the rest of us) would have had this info a few years ago.

I wish more people would know before going into the field just how bad it is. I have so many friends and colleagues in the same boat. I just hope that all this publicity on imamother will encourage moms to discourage their daughters from going into this field (unless they really really enjoy it and think this is their life's calling)

As frustrating as it is, if you truly believe you can do better elsewhere then make the switch. What's done is done. You have the masters degree already. But to keep working in a field that you don't believe will bring you financial success doesn't necessarily make sense either. And the summer is kind of a perfect time to try something new since you probably wouldn't have a full caseload anyway. Is it better to just stay in the speech field, hate your job, and not make the money you think you can make elsewhere just because you have the masters?

amother

Sand

Fri, May 27 2022, 12:37 am

Also, SLP jobs have been getting pretty bad press on this sight recently but I don't find it so bad. I put my husband through 10 years of unpaid kollel with my SLP salary and now he is a Rebbe and we have a large family BH and we do OK. We live extremely frugally but we do fine. (I was very blessed though that my parents paid for my college so no student loans.) And yes, we get some Klei kodesh benefits from his job - like Chasdei Lev (reduced price food for yom tov). But no government benefits and no free tuition.
I actually would encourage my daughters to go into the field if they felt they can be good at it. I'm not sure what field I could have done that would have been much better paying and still had a decent work/life balance. (I don't have any natural talents that would make money - like not good at hair/makeup, not artistic, am a mediocre writer, don't have a head for business or money fields, etc.)

What I'm trying to say is, don't despair and look for an office job. I don't know the situation in Brooklyn/NJ but it's got to be better to keep your SLP job and work in your field, gain more experience and hopefully move up within the field than get an office job that requires no specialized training.

And definitely get a summer job (I work in camp in the summer since my caseload is so paltry in the summer.)

amother

Sand

Fri, May 27 2022, 12:56 am

Also, some practical advice regarding getting through the month:

Definelty try to challenge yourself to cook from your pantry and buy as few groceries as possible. Maybe you can post here or in a different thread what food you'd have on hand and we can come up with a creative menu/food ideas.

Shavous can be done very cheaply. It doesn't require anything specialized like matza or lulav/esrog. Don't make cheese cake or any of those fancy milchig recipes that cost a fortune. It's nice to have meat on YT but it doesn't have to be a roast. Do you have any chopped meat in the freezer? Meatballs counts as meat. And it can be stretched by adding beans and or bread crumbs. Deli counts as meat. Do you have any of that? We've done deli sandwiches for Shabbos day meals at time. Same with hot dogs - we've done hot dogs with the fixings as a Shabbos night meal. If you have cholent meat in the freezer maybe you can make a beef stew or mushroom barley meat soup and make that into a full YT meal.
If you have canned vegetables they can be mixed with mayo and eggs and seasoning to make into a quiche. Potatoes and onions are also cheap for side dishes.
A lot of produce stores sell produce that is not in the best shape very cheaply. I use to go to a store that packaged their old produce into big bags and sold every bag for a dollar. Based on what bags I'd buy each time, that's what I cooked and served. I also used it to make baby food for my baby.
Also, maybe you can get invited out for a few of the YT meals.

Don't buy any clothing for your baby. I have almost never bought clothing for children under the age of 5 (and buy very very little even for children significantly older). Little kids clothing are constantly being given away. Find a clothing gemach, find someone with a daughter a few sizes ahead of yours that will pass on her clothing, join your local WhatsApp giveaway chats, etc. Same with toys. And maybe you can even find a local diaper gemach. Giveaway chats are also a great way to get some more food into your pantry if you are willing to go pick stuff up.

I hope some of these ideas are helpful... IyH your finances will pick up soon but these are ideas that can help you get through lean times.

amother

Acacia

Fri, May 27 2022, 1:05 am

OP I've been through really trying financial times in my life B'H things do get better. One thing that I really took out of it was strengthening my bitachon I used to learn Rav avigdor miller on shar bitachon (an english sefer) with dh and it totally changed my perspective on money! I highly recommend it! I have become so much less anxious about money. Yes its necessary to take practical steps like budgeting, increasing hours, pay etc.. but in general having more bitachon will majorly decrease you worry and anxiety about finances and parnassah! Hatzlocha!

amother

Bisque

Fri, May 27 2022, 5:46 am

amother [ Oak ] wrote:

I don’t want to out myself so I’d prefer not to give details, but is a speech therapist such a bad job? I thought they do ok..

It’s generally a second income. Op has been very vocal about how awful it is but you’re not open to working in a different setting. Per dime in an agency isn’t going to support you in a high cost area with a husband that’s not bringing in steady income.

My friends that support their families took full time jobs in hospitals/ nursing homes. Not as much fun but much better pay.

I personally am a Sw and the pay is less than speech across the board. I work 2 jobs- one in a school per diem 2 days the other a steady job in a nursing home, it’s not my favorite line of work and the hourly rate isn’t high but I can work 9-6 and make a steady paycheck that way.

Iyh your husband will build his career and you will manage but for now I agree look for something more stable.

amother

Fri, May 27 2022, 7:02 am

amother [ Sand ] wrote:

Im not sure how old you are but if you're ten years married im assuming you're older than I am (26).
The speech salary has not gone up in years. The cost of living has. im sure you didnt have to pay the cost of living we're paying today. So your SLP salary for back then was considered amazing. whereas today, I make the same as an slp from years ago, yet I pay double in rent, groceries sky rocketed, daycare prices went up etc. thats my theory. I definitely would speak to a newlywed SLP to get a better idea for prices before your daughters go into this field.

The fact that your student loans were paif by your parents is also a big help. Biden pushed off having to pay them, but Ill soon have to be giving about 850$ a month towards my loans. Which is a significant chunk of my meager paycheck.

amother

Fri, May 27 2022, 7:05 am

amother sand tysm for the suggestions!

were going to my parents for shabbos so ill take leftovers for monday night dinner.
suunday night we have a vort.
tuesday ill make pasta
wednesday ill do grilled chicken and potatoes (I have one portion of chicken breast in freezer)

I dont have any other meat in my freezer.
My shavuos menu is very simple. I make my own breads, salatim, my mom bh got me salmon bc it was on sale...

yes I dont buy anything for my baby, even if I wanted to. and there are no baby clothing gemachs near me. I went to one but the stuff was pilly and really not nice looking.

shes wearing stuff my mother got her from primark most days...

yes I go to a diaper gemach Sad

amother

Fri, May 27 2022, 7:12 am

amother [ Crimson ] wrote:

OP or anyone else that is in Brooklyn, my father volunteers in Reb Shayele's kitchen in Williamsburg. Every thursday from 6 PM they give free groceries to anyone that needs it, and not only basics. Before yom tov they have a ton of extras and it's all for free. 541 Bedford Avenue

Hey thanks so much! ill try to see if DH can come home early this week.
Will they be doing it next thursday night before yt?
What kind of things do they help with?

were not satmar chassidish is it still ok to go?
were sefardi lol

amother

Fri, May 27 2022, 7:20 am

amother [ Oak ] wrote:

Another thing is your husband wasn’t bringing in any income until now? I don’t know if that means your job is that bad, I’d just say it’s probably fine as a second income. When I mentioned earlier our high income, it was both combined. Most of it being my husband’s.

he was working somewhere and got laid off due to covid. didnt work for 8 months and was in yeshiva and then started learning a trade. then he worked for someone for 4 months and he made enough to cover rent thats it. but then my paycheck went to pay off debt we accumulated in the year he wasnt working.

my job is that bad too lol it really doesnt pay to be an SLP

amother

Seashell

Fri, May 27 2022, 7:23 am

amother [ OP ] wrote:

I'd concentrate really hard on trying to get a DOE job. There may not be tons of openings, and it may take time, but people do get jobs. Things happen and jobs open up, even in the middle of the year. If you have an application filed, you may be the one called for an interview when something opens up. It's worth it to at least try.
(I know a decent amount of frum SLPs with DOE jobs. They are not struggling the way agency ones seem to.)

amother

Fri, May 27 2022, 7:26 am

amother [ Seashell ] wrote:

yes im trying. I sent my resume to a million supervisors and through the website.
where do ur frum slp friends work?

im torn. we also want to move to israel to be near family (my siblings his siblings etc).
thats a story for a diff day lol.

amother

Seashell

Fri, May 27 2022, 7:30 am

amother [ OP ] wrote:

You can't just send a resume in, you will never get called for an interview that way. You need to fill out an official application. You probably need to register and create an account as an applicant. Look on the website and see what info they have for job applicants.

amother

Alyssum

Fri, May 27 2022, 8:06 am

amother [ Seashell ] wrote:

Now through September is the time to work on getting into the doe. I don't know the exact process. Do you know anyone in the doe that can help you out? Look online and see if there is any info on how to apply for a job. Try to network as much as you can.

amother

Sand

Fri, May 27 2022, 8:45 am

amother [ OP ] wrote:

Yes, I understand all this. I'm married and have been working more than 10 years, my oldest daughter is in high school. Here is the thing, I'm not only comparing being an SLP to 10-15 years ago, I'm STILL an SLP and I assure you, my expenses are higher than yours. My mortgage is a lot more than 2K a month, I have a lot more than one child (BH) to feed and clothe and send to sleep away camp and pay for medical expenses and extracurricular activities, etc. I pay (reduced) tuition in several schools plus a babysitter for my baby. I know what it's like to live on an SLP salary. Of course it's meant as a second salary. How many women today have jobs that support their family fully without the husband bringing in anything?? What do you suggest that would have been better? But my husband is a Rebbe, not a high earner, and we are doing OK BH. Partly because I'm very frugal but also because I make enough. Not tons, but enough. I don't think I am worse off than my friends who went into special education, social work, graphic design, OT, teaching, booking , ultrasound, etc. Even my friends who went into nursing, PA school, pharmacy, shaitels and accounting - they only do better financially if they work crazy hard hours. The ones bringing in lots of money are those with a much worse work-life balance. I start work after my kids are in school and end in time to pick them up for carpool. What could I have done that would have that schedule and make much more?? And that's why I would encourage a daughter to pursue the field if it's in line with her interests. (And we'd pay for her college in full, no student loans iyH, I agree those can be a killer.)

And I think you need to change your perspective from thinking what an awful field you are in. It's poisonous. It's killing your happiness. Shift your attitude a bit from feeling sorry for yourself, work on your Bitachon - you will get out of this rut some time soon, and work on securing the best paying job you possibly can within your field. Thing will be better!