Is she obligated to pay? Waiting for Rav reply

amother

Viola

Mon, Jun 13 2022, 2:21 pm

amother [ Currant ] wrote:

Its not the same thing. The teacher isn't there which is why the child can't handle coming.

But the assistant is there. It's normal for a teacher to send a sub. Not a reason a parent shouldn't pay.

amother

Mon, Jun 13 2022, 2:22 pm

watergirl wrote:

I'm confused; you are making presumptions. Why not clarify with the mother before asking the shailah? "Hi mom, to clarify, you do not want to bring your son the next two days, is that correct? My cancellation policy states XYZ, so you will still be billed for this time" or whatever your policy states. THEN ask a shailah if she says she will not pay, IF if goes against your policy.

Because maybe it's only fair of me not to charge her for these days.

I didn't want to text her back without really thinking this through, and asking.

Ema of 5

Mon, Jun 13 2022, 2:22 pm

amother [ Currant ] wrote:

Its not the same thing. The teacher isn't there which is why the child can't handle coming.

If my 3rd grade child’s teacher is out and my child has a hard time with the adjustment so stays home for two days, do I get a reduction on my tuition? No, I still have to pay the same monthly payment. If my child is sick and misses 3 days of school, I still have to pay. If we go away for a few days I still have to pay. A monthly payment means that the larger, full fee is just cut down into smaller bits. The full fee still has to be paid.

amother

Leaf

Mon, Jun 13 2022, 2:23 pm

amother [ Currant ] wrote:

Its not the same thing. The teacher isn't there which is why the child can't handle coming.

When you agree to pay for the year you understand that the teacher might be out once or twice. It’s totally normal to have a sub. It’s not a legitimate reason not to pay.

amother

Viola

Mon, Jun 13 2022, 2:23 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

Because maybe it's only fair of me not to charge her for these days.

I think you can charge her. Playgroup is running on schedule. Some parents just like to pester teachers without thinking first.

amother

Steelblue

Mon, Jun 13 2022, 2:23 pm

amother [ Leaf ] wrote:

She has to pay. If my kid got sick in playgroup and therefore doesn’t attend do I get money back? It’s the same thing. The program is running him having issues doesn’t qualify for money back.

Totally different. Groups and play groups have sick policies. Kid too sick to go? You still pay.
However, this was a decision made by the owner to go abroad for a few days. Didnt give any warning. Mom couldnt prep the kid either. Kid went today (mom didnt just say "Morah not here so I wont pay) but was sent home. Mom said she cant run and get him midday tomorrow so she doesnt want to pay. This is not the mom's choice or even an "act of G-d" (sick day, snow day etc) where payment would still ordinarily be expected.

This is a Totally different situation. Mom should not have to pay for the other days the Morah is not there.

amother

Leaf

Mon, Jun 13 2022, 2:25 pm

amother [ Steelblue ] wrote:

I expect there to be a sub at least twice a year. No human is never going to miss a day. The teacher did not have to inform them in advance that’s just not a normal expectation.

amother

Currant

Mon, Jun 13 2022, 2:26 pm

Ema of 4 wrote:

This is a babysitting group. Not a third grader. Not all children that age handle change well. They called mom to pick the child up. He obviously can't handle the change. The teacher chose not to warn the kids in advance and let the kids be prepared for the change.

Ema of 5

Mon, Jun 13 2022, 2:26 pm

amother [ Currant ] wrote:

I don't think you should force the mother to pay. The factors are different...you aren't there. If you were there she would send. I'm not saying you aren't entitled to a vacation but you know this kid and you know it's not the moms fault she isn't sending.

As an aside, do you work through the summer? Do you not have a break between school and camp that you could have taken a vacation then?

Why do you assume this is a pleasure trip? Maybe something came up and OP had to go now. Maybe there is a family Simcha. I can’t imagine anyone taking a pleasure trip at this point in the school year.

amother

Viola

Mon, Jun 13 2022, 2:26 pm

amother [ Steelblue ] wrote:

It is normal to send a sub. Playgroup is running on schedule, you pay.

watergirl

Mon, Jun 13 2022, 2:27 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

Because maybe it's only fair of me not to charge her for these days.

I didn't want to text her back without really thinking this through, and asking.

You have the hours she pays for, the assistant the child knows, and the child was unhappy... the only thing I can think of as to why she should not have to pay is because the assistant had her come get her crying child rather than find a way to soothe or distract him, which seems wrong to me.

amother

Leaf

Mon, Jun 13 2022, 2:27 pm

Forget about how she worded it. Look at facts. The teacher is out there is a sub. That happens in every class every year. No one gets money back. Half the time subs are useless and kids misbehave and don’t learn. Do we all demand money back for a missed day of learning? This is just not how life works.

amother

Mon, Jun 13 2022, 2:28 pm

amother [ Steelblue ] wrote:

Spot on.
But I'd still be upset that I'm messing this child around, the mum obviously wants him to go, and stay the morning and be happy! But it doesn't look like it's going to be that way, so I do feel terrible but there's nothing that I can do about it.
This child is extremely difficult with change etc.
Non of it is my fault, or the mums fault. You can argue and say its my 'fault' for going away but seriously can a Morah never go to a simcha or vacation? Let's be reasonable here.

amother

Viola

Mon, Jun 13 2022, 2:28 pm

amother [ Currant ] wrote:

My kids were never "warned" or prepared for a sub. The daily assistant is there. The kid is in a familiar environment. It's not OP problem that the kid can't handle a new face.

amother

Currant

Mon, Jun 13 2022, 2:29 pm

watergirl wrote:

If the assistant couldn't handle the child and needed to call mom to pick up then why does mom need to pay?

amother

Leaf

Mon, Jun 13 2022, 2:30 pm

It’s not normal for a child to be this distressed. He’s in the same location, same kids, same toys, same assistant. There is one stranger. He obviously has some sort of issue that is out of the bounds of normal and I don’t see why it needs to be a money loss for her.

amother

Mon, Jun 13 2022, 2:32 pm

amother [ Trillium ] wrote:

op referred to that thread herself, apparently assuming responses would have the background info. And she also mentioned being "out for an hour" when she started this thread. Reread the op on this thread, if you missed it.

I didn't say that I went out for a hour, I did that once, when I had to take my son to a dentist appointment. We're talking about 6 toddlers, 3 who are 2.5 and 3 are younger but really manageable. I said that I pop out to make supper, or run on a quick errand (grocery store around the corner) do the washing etc whilst popping in and out to be there for the kids.
I do the main things with them like davenning etc.

amother

Steelblue

Mon, Jun 13 2022, 2:33 pm

amother [ Viola ] wrote:

This is a separate issue. It's rude to bring up the other thread. OP made responsible arrangements for while she's being away and there's no reason this mom shouldn't have to pay.

Why is it rude to bring up another thread which the OP refers to herself?!? If she never mentioned it, she could have said "I am out for 3 days so hired a sub to help out my regular assistant while I am gone. 1 kid is having issues with the adjustment, had to get picked up early today, so the mom doesnt want to pay for the rest of the time I am away...".
She referenced it, it can be used to fill in the information. Otherwise us imamothers would ask questions like:
- is it an emergency why you are out?
- was this preplanned?
- when did mom get notice?
- have they ever met this assistant before?
Etc

And we would find the same basic info out.

And no, it was irresponsible to not give ANY notice she would be out. Moms were told FRIDAY for a Monday switch. And she switched timing, wanted to switch location.... she should have given more notice to parents. She should have had this new assistant come in for a few days last week to learn the ropes, let the kids be familiar with her, she can learn kids' names....

As an aside, why does it seem you are taking it so personally?