Your views on lace

nkdassy

Thu, Sep 08 2022, 8:00 pm

Are you a fan? I’m too rough with delicate things for the lace lifestyle and would definitely ruin a lace top. I’m actually super happy with my skin tops. I’ve managed to pull my hair back into some nice styles and it manages to look pretty good. But I know lace is everything for some people.

amother

Smokey

Thu, Sep 08 2022, 9:04 pm

The first time I saw a lace top, I couldn't tell the woman was wearing a sheital. I thought she was at (a frum event) with her hair uncovered. I asked if the kids with her were her nephews... Can't Believe It

I still have trouble telling from the front if it's a sheital.

DustyDiamonds

Thu, Sep 08 2022, 9:07 pm

I love mine!

I just got my third!

The hairline is so soft and natural, and it’s a much more youthful effect. I am so grateful that these have been invented recently, it makes me so much more excited about wearing a wig!

Eta. It’s more delicate Thant old wigs, but I don’t treat it like a piece of fine crystal. I put it on and off in front of the mirror, I don’t rip it off in the living room while doing three other things simultaneously.

Simple1

Thu, Sep 08 2022, 9:20 pm

If I'm going through the trouble of doing the mitzvah, may as well do it "right." There are plenty of non lace that looks natural and beautiful and still look like wigs. Not knocking anyone who does and everyone should do what works for them, just answering your question.

amother

Moonstone

Thu, Sep 08 2022, 9:22 pm

My Rav asked not to wear lace. I'm fine with that. I am up to date, and live very in-town, but I am careful with tzniyus. It happens very often that I see young girls and I seriously can't tell if they are married or single. My sheitels look great but they clearly look like wigs.

DustyDiamonds

Thu, Sep 08 2022, 9:42 pm

Simple1 wrote:

While I hear your premise, I have some questions:

Do you only eat in a sukkah built without any metal?

Do you use the largest size shiur for marror and matzah and wine?

Do you always sit down and look in a bencher each time you say al hamichya and borei nefashos and bircat hamazon?

Do you discard boxes of cereal if the baby touched it before someone washed negel vasser on her hands? Do you wash negel vasser each time you touch above your child’s elbow?

If so, I applaud you for doing so many mitzvos so extensively, quote “all the way”!

DustyDiamonds

Thu, Sep 08 2022, 9:44 pm

amother Valerian wrote:

If you're over 35 it looks like grandma in a tutu skirt.

Pls don't.

Several years above 35 here. If I knew how to upload a photo to this site on my iPhone (tried a few times) I’d be glad to present evidence that is contrary to your opinion, in my humble opinion. I could put a poll up in an anonymous enabled section!

amother

Chicory

Thu, Sep 08 2022, 9:45 pm

I owned a very high quality skin top. Wore it once. I look like a cross-dresser in sheitels. Wore my fall or caps always instead. Now I have a lace front and can finally look presentable at simchas.

Eta: I'm over 35. No, I do not look like a grandmother in a tutu. I look good. But when I'm a grandmother, I'll definitely try the tutu look- thanks for the suggestion!

amother

Valerian

Thu, Sep 08 2022, 10:00 pm

DustyDiamonds wrote:

A lace top wig is like wearing a kippa with a wig or hair covering it and asking "whats wrong".

And yes my family is very makpid with negel vasser including baby so we do dump food that was touched by non washers but how's that or anything your wrote like a lace top?

amother

Narcissus

Thu, Sep 08 2022, 10:01 pm

Simple1 wrote:

According to my yeshivish Rav, in monsey ny, wearing a lace wig is doing the mitzvah just as "right" as the old shaitels because we hold according to Rav Moshe's opinion, that the mitzvah of kisui rosh has nothing at all to do with looking like your hair is covered, and it may look natural.

Happens to be I dont own a lace wig.

But saying you're not knocking those who wear lace, but implying that they arent really doing the mitzvah as "right" as possible, is rubbing me the wrong way.

Why not assume that they asked their Rav, and he holds it is lechatchila totally fine?

amother

Dandelion

Thu, Sep 08 2022, 10:32 pm

amother Smokey wrote:

The first time I saw a lace top, I couldn't tell the woman was wearing a sheital.

Same here. I kept looking and looking and trying to see the sheitel but it just couldn't be. It was before I knew what they were, I was horrified that someone I went to school with wasn't covering her hair. Once I heard about them, I assumed that's what she was wearing.
But really, what are we trying to hide? Women have been looking beautiful in wig-looking wigs for so many years, why try to make it look like it's not there?

amother

Salmon

Thu, Sep 08 2022, 10:51 pm

amother Valerian wrote:

Very condescending post. This is your opinion about lace wigs. It's not clear halacha.

imorethanamother

Thu, Sep 08 2022, 11:40 pm

amother Chicory wrote:

Tutus ARE a great idea! Thanks, amother Chicory, for suggesting it!

I feel sad for you that you're going to try to look as dowdy as possible after 35, though. Good luck with following through on that.

imorethanamother

Thu, Sep 08 2022, 11:41 pm

amother Dandelion wrote:

Oh please. The lace wigs are pretty darn wiggy looking. I can spot one at 20 paces.

And even so, so what? It's way better than the way things used to be, with women pulling all the front of their hair out of the wig. I think this is more in line with halacha!

amother

Snapdragon

Thu, Sep 08 2022, 11:57 pm

I was recently in a place that is very frequently mentioned on Ima.
So many lace whatevers. (Don't know the differences)
I kept looking and looking at women's hairlines trying to figure out if those were sheitels.
Not my thing

amother

Steel

Fri, Sep 09 2022, 1:20 am

For me wearing a lace wig is hiddur mitzva and helps me do this mitzva to a higher level.

I am very sensory and it was really difficult for me to keep this mitzva happily until I started wearing lace top wigs, was life changing for me.
Also at the place I am right now I most probably would take some hair out in front of a regular wig and with a lace top every hair is fully covered.

I find it amazing that I can now do a mitzva with joy.
Also, hair covering is because the hair status changes to ervah on a married women, we don’t cover so ppl can tell if we’re married or not.