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Rappel
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 Wed, Mar 22 2023, 2:00 am
"how can my daughter experience Israel in a spiritual manner?"
Maybe seminary. Maybe family. Maybe working on a religious farm. Maybe sheirut leumi in a girl's school or hospital. Maybe religious college. Many, many options.
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amother
Tulip
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Wed, Mar 22 2023, 8:57 am
| amother Slategray wrote: | | Very comfortable. I'm glad I know the potential pitfalls, though, so I can be careful about them and warn my girls beforehand. |
What are the pitfalls?
From what I saw, read, and thought about, a seminary in Israel isn't a must, but a luxury. Some girls go to only have fun, for shidduchim, because everyone goes, while others - to grow first and then also have a good time.
Pitfalls as I see them - one specific seminary's principal discussed here, possible negative influences by other girls, flaunting seminary rules, going places they aren't supposed to on their own (safety).
We also don't have any relatives there, so it doesn't make it easier. Don't start me on having to schnor shabbos and Yom tov hosting after paying all this money.
I considered all these and spoke to my daughter. She knew very well that staying home was a very viable option and considered it. Ultimately, she chose to go. At this point it'll be more talking and a lot of davening.
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Chayalle
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Wed, Mar 22 2023, 9:31 am
| amother Tulip wrote: | Can you share their experiences?
Everyone I spoke to enjoyed their year. Not everything was perfect, but no one regretted going. I only hear about such experiences here and from women here looking back years ago. |
My SIL is an American living in Israel, so she ends up seeing alot of seminary students (relatives, daughters of her friends, friends of her daughters, etc...)
When my oldest was a high school senior, we discussed the seminary situation with SIL and she told me her observations: She said from the girls she sees, about half love seminary, and half tell her they feel badly telling their parents who spent so much money, but if they could get a refund they'd hop on the first plane back home.
So yes, there's definitely a percentage of students who do not enjoy their year. (some won't tell you that, because it's not "good for shidduchim").
I have personally heard from people who didn't like their seminary year at all, or who were neutral/okay but did not necessarily enjoy it. Neighbors, friends, etc...some said they went due to parental or school pressure.
Coupled with the fact that we were not excited about certain things we heard about the seminaries DD's mechaneches was recommending for her (and where she was likely to get in...) plus the fact that she herself was not raring to go, we made the decision to keep her local.
Next DD ended up making the same decision, though it was an individual process.
My next DD says (at this point) that she's going to want to go. So we'll make that decision when she gets there (she's in 9th grade).
For reference, I myself loved seminary, and went for Shana Bet!
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amother
Tulip
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Wed, Mar 22 2023, 10:05 am
| Chayalle wrote: | My SIL is an American living in Israel, so she ends up seeing alot of seminary students (relatives, daughters of her friends, friends of her daughters, etc...)
When my oldest was a high school senior, we discussed the seminary situation with SIL and she told me her observations: She said from the girls she sees, about half love seminary, and half tell her they feel badly telling their parents who spent so much money, but if they could get a refund they'd hop on the first plane back home.
So yes, there's definitely a percentage of students who do not enjoy their year. (some won't tell you that, because it's not "good for shidduchim").
I have personally heard from people who didn't like their seminary year at all, or who were neutral/okay but did not necessarily enjoy it. Neighbors, friends, etc...some said they went due to parental or school pressure.
Coupled with the fact that we were not excited about certain things we heard about the seminaries DD's mechaneches was recommending for her (and where she was likely to get in...) plus the fact that she herself was not raring to go, we made the decision to keep her local.
Next DD ended up making the same decision, though it was an individual process.
My next DD says (at this point) that she's going to want to go. So we'll make that decision when she gets there (she's in 9th grade).
For reference, I myself loved seminary, and went for Shana Bet! |
People you personally heard from who didn't enjoy the year, were they girls who just came back or women looking back 5+ y?
What are the reasons girls told your SIL they didn't enjoy their year?
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