She won't be traumatized, right? UPDATE

amother

Bellflower

Thu, Jul 06 2023, 8:34 pm

They should teach pregnant women about attachment instead of Lamaze. It would be way more beneficial for the baby.

amother

Amaranthus

Thu, Jul 06 2023, 8:35 pm

Genius wrote:

Not every vacation is הוללות. Sometimes it’s necessary for everyone involved.

It doesn't seem like the case here.
If that would be the case, OP would just do it no questions asked.
It seems like now is just a convenient time for OP to go, so why not....

amother

Latte

Thu, Jul 06 2023, 8:35 pm

amother Bellflower wrote:

They should teach pregnant women about attachment instead of Lamaze. It would be way more beneficial for the baby.

Agree!

Genius

Thu, Jul 06 2023, 8:35 pm

amother Latte wrote:

It is abandonment albeit unintentionally. The baby has no sense of time and has no idea if her mother will return. You are causing trauma potentially. I personally am suffering from being the baby in a scenario described.

Genuinely asking, how does one know with certainty what exactly is the source of their suffering?

amother

Oldlace

Thu, Jul 06 2023, 8:35 pm

amother Honeysuckle wrote:

She'll be perfectly fine! This is the best age to go away before shes old enough to really miss you
Do make sure that she takes a bottle nicely if you're nursing

Disagree. Babies of any age deeply miss their primary caregivers. They have no context to understand temporary either. I would never.

amother

Amaranthus

Thu, Jul 06 2023, 8:36 pm

amother Bellflower wrote:

They should teach pregnant women about attachment instead of Lamaze. It would be way more beneficial for the baby.

From what I see, it's a new "style" for young couples to leave infants to vacation. It was almost unheard of years ago.

amother

Latte

Thu, Jul 06 2023, 8:36 pm

Genius wrote:

Genuinely asking, how does one know with certainty what exactly is the source of their suffering?

There is no way to know for sure but it’s the most plausible explanation.

behappy2

Thu, Jul 06 2023, 8:36 pm

amother Bellflower wrote:

The ignorance regarding basic child development principles is mind blowing to me.

Don’t have kids until you’re done vacationing as a couple. Please.

What do you know that we don't know? Where and who are you getting your education from?

amother

Amaranthus

Thu, Jul 06 2023, 8:36 pm

Genius wrote:

Genuinely asking, how does one know with certainty what exactly is the source of their suffering?

This can usually be uncovered through therapy.

amother

Oldlace

Thu, Jul 06 2023, 8:38 pm

amother Crystal wrote:

Are you serious?
Op, please don't listen to this.
Long term effects of a week spent with grandparents? Stop it.

You sound ignorant about the science of attachment.

Genius

Thu, Jul 06 2023, 8:39 pm

You guys know that people can have differing opinions without being ignorant and uneducated. Yes?

amother

Melon

Thu, Jul 06 2023, 8:40 pm

A week without the baby is a bit much. I never did research on this , but I would think max 3 days.
We don't know everyone's personal situation. Possibly, the baby is better off with calm and happy parents who returned from vacation - and not angry parents screaming at each other all day. Strife and tension between parents is what causes a baby or child trauma.

amother

Oatmeal

Thu, Jul 06 2023, 8:43 pm

If you are not going imminently, can you arrange for your baby to spend more time with the grandparents (with you right there as well) until you go away?

amother

Oldlace

Thu, Jul 06 2023, 8:43 pm

amother Mintcream wrote:

It’s not abandonment.

What you say is one thing. What your baby experiences is what matters. So sick of parents who think their child isnt a real person until they reach a certain age.

amother

Thu, Jul 06 2023, 8:44 pm

amother Oatmeal wrote:

If you are not going imminently, can you arrange for your baby to spend more time with the grandparents (with you right there as well) until you go away?

I can and I think I will

amother

Mintcream

Thu, Jul 06 2023, 8:45 pm

amother Amaranthus wrote:

If OP would be confident that it's an OK thing to do, then she wouldn't question it.....

And just because she’s not confident doesn’t mean it’s going to cause trauma.

amother

Bellflower

Thu, Jul 06 2023, 8:47 pm

Genius wrote:

You guys know that people can have differing opinions without being ignorant and uneducated. Yes?

Saying that leaving a baby for a week will have no impact, is ignorant.

Saying that a vacation is worth risking your baby’s attachment, is a difference of opinion.

amother

Amaranthus

Thu, Jul 06 2023, 8:47 pm

amother Mintcream wrote:

And just because she’s not confident doesn’t mean it’s going to cause trauma.

This is not for you to say which such certainty. We can't know, which is why we err to the side of caution when it comes to our children.

amother

Aubergine

Thu, Jul 06 2023, 8:47 pm

I don't know if you will cause lasting trauma but I don't appreciate when people leave their babies and then say they were sooo sad and cried and missed their baby soooo much. No one held a gun to your head. If it's a choice you're making just do it and own it and you can't claim to be devastated about it. You chose it, so live with it or don't do it.

People who can't survive without their babies and love them so so much don't make the same decisions. I don't get involved when people I know leave their infants but I don't give attention to to videos and messages of how much they miss them. So just don't go if you miss them so much.