Who pays for waxing?

amother

Tue, Sep 05 2023, 4:10 pm

Who pays for eyebrow/upper lip waxing? You or your teenager. When I was a teen I always paid for it on my own since my mother always claimed I could tweeze if I want but now my daughter claims everyone else's parents pay for it.

amother

Viola

Tue, Sep 05 2023, 4:12 pm

Parents usually

amother

Stonewash

Tue, Sep 05 2023, 4:12 pm

amother OP wrote:

Parents. I didn’t grow up paying for necessities or clothing
Waxing is a necessity, tweezing is ridiculously painful, slow, and not necessarily neat

amother

Hosta

Tue, Sep 05 2023, 4:12 pm

I think the parent. Waxing is not a luxury for a teenager.

amother

Chambray

Tue, Sep 05 2023, 4:12 pm

I pay for my teen dd’s waxing and manicures etc. My mother never did so I do it for my girls but I don’t know if that’s standard

flowerpower

Tue, Sep 05 2023, 4:12 pm

Definitely the parent!

amother

DarkViolet

Tue, Sep 05 2023, 4:19 pm

I pay for it.

B”H it doesn’t impact my ability to put food on my Shabbos table.

I also pay for clothes, toiletries, the occasional going out with friends as long as it is not excessive or expensive, tutoring. My kids do not get allowance. I was raised the same.

Cookin4days

Tue, Sep 05 2023, 4:20 pm

Parents

amother

Grape

Tue, Sep 05 2023, 4:21 pm

I pay. I wouldn't make my daughters pay for it themselves, or make them tweeze.

amother

DarkGray

Tue, Sep 05 2023, 4:27 pm

I guess I am the only one who makes my daughter pay?!?! LOL I don't do it monthly and we are in a current condition to afford that monthly. So she pays it maybe in the future if our financial situation improves...she also asked recently for additional not needed or necessary sweatshirts and she said if I am not paying for it she will.

amother

Grape

Tue, Sep 05 2023, 7:08 pm

amother DarkGray wrote:

An extra sweatshirt is not compared to waxing. I think waxing for many girls, especially facial hair, is a necessity and not an extra. I pay for my kids necessities.

amother

Dill

Tue, Sep 05 2023, 7:19 pm

I pay for waxing/threading/manicure before yom tov and before family simchos. My daughters pay for any other grooming needs in between, or do it on their own.

small bean

Tue, Sep 05 2023, 7:33 pm

I pay. But I always wonder if it's standard. I also take them to a more expensive place, if they were paying on their own they wouldn't go there.

Happydance

Tue, Sep 05 2023, 7:46 pm

Depends, if it’s because she wants to be pampered and not bother with a bit of using a tweezer, I wouldn’t pay. If she had excessive hair and needed the waxing, I would be happy to pay for it

amother

Copper

Tue, Sep 05 2023, 7:54 pm

My teen daughter does. As well as for manis.

amother

Latte

Tue, Sep 05 2023, 8:08 pm

I’m wondering how a teen is supposed to have money to pay for necessities. Being groomed and put together is a necessity in my opinion. My parents never had enough money but always paid for electrolysis, waxing etc. for me. of course once I was out of school and working I chipped in with my paycheck, but exactly how is a child/teen supposed to have money to pay? Tweezing isn’t exactly an option.

amother

Aster

Tue, Sep 05 2023, 8:09 pm

Waxing eyebrows and lip are a necessity for a teenage girl. My mom would pay for my electrolysis and waxing needs in high school.
When I graduated high school I paid for my own body laser.

amother

Copper

Tue, Sep 05 2023, 8:10 pm

My teen has been working throughout high school, summers, Sundays, then also evenings in 11th-12th grades.

amother

Indigo

Tue, Sep 05 2023, 8:23 pm

amother Latte wrote:

My daughters babysit and get $10 an hour. They could babysit every night if they wanted. We are constantly getting phone calls for babysitters. They also worked for 4 weeks in the summer and got a few hundred plus tips. They get birthday and chanuka money too. They use their money to go out with friends, extra stuff I don’t think are necessary, brand name stuff

coloredleaves

Tue, Sep 05 2023, 9:22 pm

Waxing is a necessity and part of self care. And it's not soemthibg somebody would do every week just to splurge. It's fine when needs . So that is part of basic grooming for a female in our frum community.

Re manicures I pay for manicures 3-6 times a year. Like if there is a big simcha in the family or before pesach or succos. Which is also the only time I do it. I don't even do it before every yt for myself every time but if I had nice nails I would and I like seeing my girls looking nice like that.
If they wanted to do it often in between and that isn't the norm that I modeled then I would tell them it's a splurge and they should pay for half or maybe the whole thing themselves. But since lots of girls in our neighborhood do a manicure before yt and that isn't considered a big luxury here, and since I like how it looks and think it is part of self care for a teen and young adult, then I wouldn't make them pay for those times. I like how it looks and consider before yt and a big simcha to be a normal middle class / frum lifestyle / classy thing to do.

If they wanted a random time I would likely pay occasionally if it was with friends and a social things like I sometimes Chen money to go bowling or to lunch etc... but if it was a lot I'd say if it it's more often then a certain amount u need to pay for half (or all of it) .

Dating age for dates and even just going to weddings of friends I paid every time they wanted it bc I think that's part of looking presentable in our community norms after seminary.

So basiclaly if it's in the norms and we can basically afford it and I prefer they get it to bc it looks nice and is in line with what I model, then of course I pay for it. If it's a lot Uber what I modeled as what we spend then Id say this is what we can do and what I think is about average. If u want to do more often than I sponsor it, I totally understand but I'd need you to contribute since it's a bit of a splurge.