No energy for yamim noraim

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Forum -> Yom Tov / Holidays -> Rosh Hashana-Yom Kippur

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amother

Thu, Sep 14 2023, 12:46 pm

I know. It’s terrible.

Going through a rough pregnancy and work and juggling so much in life teens and Little’s ones and family dynamics . Also dealing with illness. I just can’t. I can’t listen to speeches and I can’t daven and I can’t do anything. Everyday that I and baby make it through on and I collapse in my bed is a miracle . And then I have to get up and do it all over again. I am working hard enough to get the food on the table and it will be a huge feat to just do that.

I am a spiritual person in general but this year I just can’t. So much hangs in the balance for me but I have not even one iota of strength to approach these days properly even at the barest minimum.

amother

Razzmatazz

Thu, Sep 14 2023, 12:49 pm

And that is OK. You sound like you're doing everything right, be kind to yourself.

amother

Chestnut

Thu, Sep 14 2023, 12:50 pm

Same.

I’ve got something pretty dreadful hanging over me and it feels like davening is useless.

amother

Forestgreen

Thu, Sep 14 2023, 1:11 pm

My husband tells me
עיצומו של יום מכפר
Yom Kippur "works" even if you don't feel or do a thing (besides fast)

amother

Thu, Sep 14 2023, 4:25 pm

amother Forestgreen wrote:

My husband tells me
עיצומו של יום מכפר
Yom Kippur "works" even if you don't feel or do a thing (besides fast)

So much for that. I’m not allowed to fast due to a medical condition

amother

Mistyrose

Thu, Sep 14 2023, 5:17 pm

amother OP wrote:

So much for that. I’m not allowed to fast due to a medical condition

That's not what it means. Itzumo shel Yom mechaper means that the day itself is powerful, just by living through it, whether or not you are able to fast.

amother

Mistyrose

Thu, Sep 14 2023, 5:20 pm

I've had years like this, mainly due to mental health issues. And sometimes the following year is wonderful. Hashem really wants from us no more than the best we can do. And if the best we can do is 10 seconds of prayer or a moment or two of introspection, then that's really good enough.

In a strange sort of way, those years are almost kind of easier (not really just in one sense). Like if all you can do is pray for 1 minute, it's easier to stay focused than the year you spend the entire day in shul. If you're really at your max just getting through the day with the essentials, it's almost easier to be your best then those years you're trying to be as holy as possible.

PinkFridge

Thu, Sep 14 2023, 5:59 pm

amother OP wrote:

So much for that. I’m not allowed to fast due to a medical condition

Then you are doing the ratzon Hashem by not fasting. That's what the day is all about, making Hashem's will ours.

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