At what age should women wear shorter shaitels/hair?

Tzedek Tirdof

Wed, Sep 20 2023, 3:38 pm

Cheiny wrote:

Is there a certain age that you think women start looking inappropriate by having longer hair?

The option for “Never. Wear whatever you think looks good” is not working so I have reported the post to get it fixed.

What is the point of this poll? So a bunch of women can be judgmental about other women’s attire right before Yom Kippur?

I am in my 50s and have long natural hair and wear longer sheitels. I am not sure why you think I look “inappropriate” but I do think that in this period of Teshuva there are better things to be mulling over than my hair.

gootlfriends

Wed, Sep 20 2023, 3:47 pm

I happen to think the very long sheitels are obscene on everyone. But past the shoulder to chest area is ok until 50 I would say. On older women it looks silly. I generally wear shoulder length and I am 34.

Cheiny

Wed, Sep 20 2023, 3:58 pm

Tzedek Tirdof wrote:

Whoa. Not sure why you had such an extreme reaction.

Did I state my own opinion on this in any way? Yes, one of the choices was, “Never, wear whatever you think looks good.”
And your reference to teshuva being what to be mulling over is… strange and irrelevant. Nothing to get upset about here. Human nature is such that we’re thinking about or entertaining different areas of thought and maybe aren’t focused every moment of every day on spiritual issues, as nice and worthy as that might be.

Last edited by Cheiny on Wed, Sep 20 2023, 4:41 pm; edited 1 time in total

Tzedek Tirdof

Wed, Sep 20 2023, 3:59 pm

gootlfriends wrote:

You’ve never even met me and you are telling me that my hair looks “silly” a few days before Yom Kippur? You see no issue with this focus?

Tzedek Tirdof

Wed, Sep 20 2023, 4:04 pm

Cheiny wrote:

Whoa. Not sure why you had such an extreme reaction.

Did I state my own opinion on this in any way? Yes, one of the choices was, “Never, wear whatever you think looks good.”
And your reference to teshuva are what to be mulling over is… strange and irrelevant. Nothing to get upset about here. Human nature is such that we’re thinking about or entertaining different areas of thought and maybe aren’t focused every moment of every day on spiritual issues, as nice and worthy as that might be.

Have you read the recent thread about the 22-year old who went to Shul and had a man mention his hat? This is no better.

My “extreme” reaction is because I am in my 50s with long hair. I don’t consider other women’s opinions in how I choose to wear my hair or sheitels. However, it certainly isn’t in the spirit of Yom Kippur to tell a woman that her style is “inappropriate” or “silly” unsolicited.

The choice “Never, wear whatever you think looks good” is not showing up as a poll option.

lkwdmom2

Wed, Sep 20 2023, 4:07 pm

I’m 45 with a 3 year old. My oldest is in high school. I wear a regular long sheital a little past my shoulders. Just cuz I’m 45 I should start wearing a short Bubby sheital??

GLUE

Wed, Sep 20 2023, 4:10 pm

I agree with Tzedek Tirdof that this is an inappropriate topic.

If the question was I am over 40\50 is it inappropriate for me to wear a long shaitel that is a different question.

But to judge someone else that's inappropriate.

gootlfriends

Wed, Sep 20 2023, 4:16 pm

Tzedek Tirdof wrote:

You’ve never even met me and you are telling me that my hair looks “silly” a few days before Yom Kippur? You see no issue with this focus?

At first glance, yes, I do think so. But if I saw you on the street I likely wouldn't focus on it. I might not even notice you. This isn't personal and it's an opinion. I think very long hair in general is ridiculous. I dont let my daughter who is 12 grow it past her chest. I know it's in style. I dont have to like it.

Tzedek Tirdof

Wed, Sep 20 2023, 4:26 pm

gootlfriends wrote:

I don’t like how I look with shorter hair and my opinion is the one that counts. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Cheiny

Wed, Sep 20 2023, 4:43 pm

Tzedek Tirdof wrote:

Yes, you did and do have an extreme reaction and I’ll reiterate that I never expressed my opinion either way so I’m not sure why you chose to attack me.

Your answer should’ve just been the first, and then you could’ve moved on.

My mistake that the first isn’t coming through as a poll option, but you can clearly see that was my intention and it won’t allow me to now edit and add it.

wigboutique

Wed, Sep 20 2023, 4:55 pm

gootlfriends wrote:

I find it so sad that you think that way. My hair is 70cm and it makes me so happy. I hope your daughter gets to grow it as long as she likes when she is living by herself.

effess

Wed, Sep 20 2023, 5:06 pm

Why is late 40’s considered older?

My close friend is in her 50’s and I see her as young/energetic etc.

And someone is her low 30’s I know has an old woman vibe.

Everyone do what you want and everyone else, your opinion matters nothing!

little neshamala

Wed, Sep 20 2023, 5:12 pm

I know someone in her 60s with a long shaitel to mid back. She works out, and is trim and fit, and I dont know if its genetics or she's got an amazing facial routine but her face looks pretty and young.
Her long shaitel fits right in with her vibrant look. I see no reason for her (or anyone) to limit hairstyle by a number.
If you can pull off the look, why not

ocean blue

Wed, Sep 20 2023, 5:18 pm

I also find this poll to be so judgy. And why is 40/50 the only option. Why not 80/90??
If I was in my 20s, I would probably answer 40/50. I used to think of people in this age bracket as ancient. But now that I am nearing 50, I must say that I still feel and look pretty young and I am not planning on getting rid of my long sheitels any time soon. I have several friends who are older than me and look very good in a long sheitel too.

So what is your point op? Are you trying to decide what is appropriate for yourself or for others around you?

Bnei Berak 10

Wed, Sep 20 2023, 5:24 pm

gootlfriends wrote:

Actually the Yerushalmim 'old yeshuv' the girls have very long hair BUT it's always in two long braids. Never ponytail. If you don't go braided it's sensible not to have it too long Smile