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Send help! Wedding!
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Post Wed, Apr 03 2024, 9:15 pm
I thought their request was to provide the physical space, not to do all the detailed planning. Can't this couple make some decisions about some things (colors, menus, etc.) to take some of the burden off your shoulders? Or do you think it's just easier to just do everything yourself?
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Post Wed, Apr 03 2024, 9:18 pm
amother OP wrote:
Thank you all! You’re hysterical thinking I know what gemachim are in my neighborhood! Have I mentioned I e never done anything in the Simcha department before?! Not even an upsherin! Not counting the Bris my parents paid for at their shul!

I live in Monsey so tell me if there are any gemachiim. Is there really a gemach for a chuppah?!

Budget wise is low. I can order flowers but what do I do with them?

MP3 for music is great idea— is there like a wedding playlist with beautiful music for eating time and then Simcha dancing playlist?

Start a separate thread for this, saying you are looking for song suggestions for a wedding playlist - I am sure you will get plenty of great ideas IM"H!
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Post Wed, Apr 03 2024, 9:18 pm
If you're planning a backyard chuppah then have a backup plan if it rains.

Do you have any friends who love to organize parties? Tell them you need their help! Don't be shy to reach out and ask for people with more experience to help you. Just make sure that there is one person overall in charge so things don't fall through the cracks.

Kol hakavod to you! Tizku l'mitzvos!
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Post Thu, Apr 04 2024, 7:09 am
I so appreciate everyone’s help!

I don’t have many friends here yet. We only moved here about 5 months ago, and it’s been the winter so haven’t had a chance to socialize much.

But now that I got over the shock a little bit, I realized I am probably more capable than I’m giving myself credit for.

I’m super organized so that should come in handy.

Any tips from those of you who made weddings would be greatly appreciated!
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Post Thu, Apr 04 2024, 10:09 am
DrMom wrote:
I thought their request was to provide the physical space, not to do all the detailed planning. Can't this couple make some decisions about some things (colors, menus, etc.) to take some of the burden off your shoulders? Or do you think it's just easier to just do everything yourself?

I agree with Dr Mom.

When you wrote they asked you to host I assumed that meant to be a free venue. That already a big deal!

I didnt read that they are asking you to be their party planner. I see that's where you are taking this though.1

Check if they want/need that from you.

Though if they want and you want to tackle kol hakovod to you!

Please note, there are significant time and/or money outlays you are commiting to depending on what you are taking on. Shlepping tables and chairs is work or cost. Washing tablecloths is work. Etc

If you ARE volunteering to be the party planner, list out what you think you need and sit down w bride to make sure you are not both tackling items. (For example, a poster discussed the kallahs flowers. There is a good chance shes tackling that herself).
Also, you can get a sense of what she is envisioning.

This will also help you understand what you are commiting to so you only commit to what you can take on.

I've made sheva brachos for about 50 and organized the following
I guess the chasuna is the most important sheva brachos.

- HELP. I did not do this alone. need help gethering items, setting up, cleaning up : either paid or "cohosts". I shared work and expenses w the cohosts.

- tablecloths from gemach - I picked a pattern, but for a wedding you may want to go classiv white unless you need to dress up a space. I find tbe volunteers at my gemach tk be helpful for guidance.
- rented tables and chairs (might be gemach). Remember head table and
- if buffet, need tables, tablecloths, sterno supplies, platters. I get another set of clean tablecloths for dessert
(Note I usually plate the meal w the help of my cohosts as it comes out cheaper than buffet. Downside is we are in the kitchen and busy
- hired a 7th grader keyboard player - only men danced. Not sure what you want for a wedding.
-I had seperate seating but no mechitza, youll probably need one if dancing - will need to rent or borrow.
- centerpieces- gemach for fake flowers or candle display
- paper goods- this adds up VERY FAST. some are on sale now for pesach. Plan your menu then decide what you need for each place and serving. Get extra. Have cheapies inside your house for extra back up.
Extra foil pans on hand
- lots of garbage bags and grocery store boxes
- bentchers - not sure. I have printed cards I use.
- wine for bentching (for chasuna, youll also use for chuppah so get white)
- bechers for bentching and chuppah

Extra for chasuna to think about
- chuppah, think a handheld one and you can honour pple w holding it. Like the ones used in hochnosos sefer torahs.
- chair for kallah kobolos ponim
- are you putting out food at this time?
- table/chair set up and tablecloths for chosson tishe.
- shnapps for xhossin tishe? Cake?
- someone mentioned kallah flowers
- plate to break
- glass to break (wrapped in napkin)
- yichud room. Talk to their mesadee kiddushin aboit requirements
- photographer?

- food and menu, drinks,

I make in my home because we are self catering. If you are using catered food it might be kdai to call around. In Lakewood at least, there are cheap shuls and they will have tables, chairs, mechitzos for you. For 40 pple youll have plenty of dancing room. It may be cheaper and easier.

Lots to do!
Mske sure yourr not on your own!
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Post Wed, May 08 2024, 8:52 pm
How did it turn out??
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