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Yelling at your kids????

 
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amother




 

Post  Mon, Mar 27 2006, 2:01 pm
do you ever yell at your kids? I don't do it often but when I do, it makes me feel like such a horrible mother. I feel really bad for my kids. I don't yell degrading things at them, I do tell them I'm upset, sometimes I even threaten them (the worst threat was to send them to the basement - it's not a "scary" basement, it's finished. they have a playroom there but they don't like being there by themselves.)

is this normal? I mean, does everyone yell at their kids every once in a while (it happens like once every 2 or 3 months, not related to my cycles or anything like that.)
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happymom




 
 
 
 

Post  Mon, Mar 27 2006, 6:49 pm
its normal but definitely not good and thats why u feel so bad. when u feel the need to yell, can u go to your room and try and calm yourself down, like count to ten and breathe or something... if u try hard not to but loose it sometimes, understandably ull feel bad, but u are human and its normal. What I do think is good and very important though is to apologize and tell ure kids later that although the action they did was wrong, u are sorry that u yelled at them! (after all, they are still ppl and we need to apologize even to our kids when we do something wrong.)
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amother




 

Post  Mon, Mar 27 2006, 6:59 pm
I always do apoligize to them afterwards and make sure they know I wasn't upset at them but at something else that made me yell at them. it's still hard though. I can try going to the bedroom next time, I hope it doesn't happen for a while though.
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goldrose




 
 
 
 

Post  Mon, Mar 27 2006, 7:16 pm
I dont think its a terrible thing to yell (and I'm not of the yellers), but I do let my kids konw that if/when certain things happen "it makes me feel like screaming so loud!"
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Tefila




 
 
 
 

Post  Mon, Mar 27 2006, 8:05 pm
Yelling gets one nowhere. I have on ocassion yelled can count it on my hand in cases of emergencys. but as a basic rule yelling just doesn't work as long term methods. Exclamation It's ugly besides the point Exclamation and most times thru creativity you can produce the same results in a quieter voice.
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goldrose




 
 
 
 

Post  Mon, Mar 27 2006, 9:31 pm
Tefila wrote:
Yelling gets one nowhere. I have on ocassion yelled can count it on my hand in cases of emergencys. but as a basic rule yelling just doesn't work as long term methods. Exclamation It's ugly besides the point Exclamation and most times thru creativity you can produce the same results in a quieter voice.


it does let out stress, and it does let the kids know you are frustrated, and I think there is benefit in both of those. like I said, I'm not of the yellers, but I think an occassional yell isnt terrible. as long as it's not hurtful to anyone.
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happymom




 
 
 
 

Post  Mon, Mar 27 2006, 11:45 pm
all yelling does is teaches kids that when they are upset, they should yell. and thats what happens. they start to yell at each other... and when they are old enough, they yell back. yelling is NEVER good Exclamation
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