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Forum
-> Relationships
-> Manners & Etiquette
amother
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Tue, Aug 20 2013, 3:41 pm
I had an unexpected break from work one day and came home earlier than usual. I find my neighbor powerwashing his house with my hose hooked up to my water supply. (I have a well, which is free water but costs electricity to run; he has no well, costs $$$ to dig one). He never asked us just helped himself. We don't have a good relationship with this neighbor so DH asked me to never confront him when these things come up. (He's helped himself to things in the past, no boundaries...) DH told me he never gave permission to use the hose.
A week later he asked DH if he can use the hose once. DH said ok, felt stupid saying no. I put our hose away since we are away for the summer and DH came home to find their hose attached to out well extending into their yard, like they use it every day. He disconnected it and tossed it into their yard.
Now it's not the issue of using it, but since these ppl have boundary issues, have taken things in the past, I want this to stop. I want to put a lock on my outdoor faucets that only I can open with a key. Am I being petty? It doesn't cost me much $$$ but I'm uncomfortable with them waltzing in and out of my yard, who knows what else they'll help themselves to? My yard isn't fenced in, but I planted privacy trees by property line so they squeeze between them to get in and out. WWYD?
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greenfire
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Tue, Aug 20 2013, 5:42 pm
unless you're close friends and allow this ... he should not be using your outside water spigot any more than you should be using his kitchen sink faucet
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FranticFrummie
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Tue, Aug 20 2013, 5:46 pm
If you lock your front door, you can lock your well. I hope you have a good lock on your garage and tool shed, too. It wouldn't cost much to run a strand or two of barbed wire along your property line, either. Tell him it keeps the deer from eating your lettuce.
As you can tell, I'm a country gal at heart, and big on property rights.
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amother
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Tue, Aug 20 2013, 5:54 pm
I would put in a real fence instead (or in addition to) the trees.
As per Robert Frost: "Good fences make good neighbors"
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mummiedearest
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Tue, Aug 20 2013, 5:57 pm
I'd go for the fence AND the lock on the faucet.
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bamamama
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Tue, Aug 20 2013, 6:12 pm
Yep to everything everyone said. This guy has no boundaries and seems to think that what's yours is his.
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amother
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Tue, Aug 20 2013, 7:41 pm
TOTALLY JUSTIFIED.
I'd lock it. I might also buy a prefab shed, cut a hole in the back, and stick the faucet in that. Then lock the shed, too. Extra protection, AND more storage!
So, if you're still feeling petty, take comfort that you're not as petty as me.
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vintagebknyc
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Tue, Aug 20 2013, 7:45 pm
lock down it all. because if it's just a fence he'll walk through--which makes me wonder if it's worth spending on a fence if it's not going to be a deterrent. just everything. think about a scary dog. or invite me over to deal with him
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greenfire
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Tue, Aug 20 2013, 7:46 pm
p.s. you can turn off a faucet from the inside
no key needed & is even suggested for the winter months
if you don't already have an on/off valve - they are inexpensive to install
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Rutabaga
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Tue, Aug 20 2013, 7:46 pm
There is a definite difference between being a good neighbor and being taken advantage of. Your neighbors are definitely taking advantage of you. I would cut them off or charge them a service fee.
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greenfire
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Tue, Aug 20 2013, 7:48 pm
btw some neighbors don't mind sharing ... like mine
but here in NEOH water cost monies [even polluted lake erie]
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amother
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Tue, Aug 20 2013, 8:12 pm
actually "good fences make good neighbors" is from Torah and yeah, obviously it's true -- go for it!
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amother
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Tue, Aug 20 2013, 8:56 pm
Op here
Thanks for the responses. I can't do a fence now too much $$$. Barbed wire is no good I have little kids they could get hurt, also I doubt it would stop him. Shed sounds good but I don't have the space. I found a weatherproof lock that would work in the winter and not rust.
The whole situation is so uncomfortable. I know that when I put that lock they will be so mad!!! They used to mooch our wifi too. Whenever our service went down for a couple of days he would call DH every hour asking when he's fixing it, he needs it, etc. we finally put an access code in.
It's not the usage that irks me so much but the stealing and sneaking, and that I don't trust having him around, who knows what he'll help himself too. I wonder if his wife knows...
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anonymrs
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Tue, Aug 20 2013, 9:42 pm
amother wrote: | Op here
Thanks for the responses. I can't do a fence now too much $$$. Barbed wire is no good I have little kids they could get hurt, also I doubt it would stop him. Shed sounds good but I don't have the space. I found a weatherproof lock that would work in the winter and not rust.
The whole situation is so uncomfortable. I know that when I put that lock they will be so mad!!! They used to mooch our wifi too. Whenever our service went down for a couple of days he would call DH every hour asking when he's fixing it, he needs it, etc. we finally put an access code in.
It's not the usage that irks me so much but the stealing and sneaking, and that I don't trust having him around, who knows what he'll help himself too. I wonder if his wife knows... |
His wife is probably coming on to imamother to post:
I'M MORTIFIED OF DH!!
He has no social skills, doesn't know his boundaries. It's bad enough when it happens at home but I just found out that he's been prancing across neighbors yard to hook up a hose to their well. I've tried to bring it up nicely to him but he just can't seem to understand the problem saying that they don't pay for it because it's well water so what's the big deal. He is like this with so many issues but he simply refuses to see a therapist to work on his boundary issues. He is so stubborn and thick-headed, now I'm embarrassed to see my neighbors, they probably think we're crazy.
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Tablepoetry
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Wed, Aug 21 2013, 6:37 am
I would get some sort of fence. If you don't have money for a real one now, put up some bamboo or safer wire (NOT barbed wire), something that won't hurt kids but has to really be climbed over.
Then, a dog roaming about your fenced yard. That should do the trick!
Then hopefully you won't need to put a lock on the faucet. That's a bit too direct IMO - although of course it's well within your rights, but it might anger him.
No gun though please!
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