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Forum
-> Yom Tov / Holidays
-> Shabbos, Rosh Chodesh, Fast Days, and other Days of Note
amother
Crimson
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Sun, Aug 11 2019, 12:19 pm
amother [ Periwinkle ] wrote: | He should make havdala, and you should drink the grape juice. |
Please don’t pasken for her. She has to ask her rav. I was told to make havdallah myself on orange juice.
(Not supposed to drink wine/ grape juice until tomorrow after chatzos)
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imasoftov
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Sun, Aug 11 2019, 1:31 pm
amother [ Crimson ] wrote: | Please don’t pasken for her. She has to ask her rav. I was told to make havdallah myself on orange juice.
(Not supposed to drink wine/ grape juice until tomorrow after chatzos) |
I agree that this too is a question to ask, but there are also different opinions about what to make havadala on during the Nine Days. This might also apply to havdala when the fast is over.
https://www.torahmusings.com/2.....days/
Last edited by imasoftov on Sun, Aug 11 2019, 1:44 pm; edited 1 time in total
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amother
Ecru
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Sun, Aug 11 2019, 1:36 pm
sury123 wrote: | I don't fast b/c I'm nursing and my DH said I should not make havdalah ,wondering if he made a mistake ,does everyone make havdalah ? |
My dh told me to make havdola on coffee tea or OJ.
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amother
Silver
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Sun, Aug 11 2019, 1:49 pm
Does anyone have a heter to drink water but not eat? I just heard of this from a friend and wondering how common that is.
Or does on tisha bav, drinking count as breaking your fast?
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amother
Seashell
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Sun, Aug 11 2019, 1:54 pm
amother [ Crimson ] wrote: | Please don’t pasken for her. She has to ask her rav. I was told to make havdallah myself on orange juice.
(Not supposed to drink wine/ grape juice until tomorrow after chatzos) |
Shivim panim ltorah.
My Rav says to make a hagafen
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amother
Chartreuse
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Sun, Aug 11 2019, 1:55 pm
I was told not to fast due to pregnancy and the fact that I get dizzy if theres no food in me.
I actually almost fainted as I was prepping my food.
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Aylat
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Sun, Aug 11 2019, 1:57 pm
amother [ Ecru ] wrote: | My dh told me to make havdola on coffee tea or OJ. |
I made havdala on beer, according to the halacha book Guidelines. Ucchhhh.
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amother
Fuchsia
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Sun, Aug 11 2019, 1:57 pm
Was recently hospitalized and needed surgery. I came home and ended up back in the hospital that night with complications. Both my surgeon AND my PCP said it’s fine for me to fast. Rav said absolutely not, not even at night. It’s weird but for me this is the Halacha right now.
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amother
Black
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Sun, Aug 11 2019, 2:02 pm
I got a heter because I am pregnant and prone to getting lightheaded and dizzy and nauseous. Also, the Dr. said not to fast. I spoke with a Rav who told me to try to fast, but if at any time I felt unwell, to make havdallah and break the fast. I made it almost to 10am. I don't feel guilty, because I am following instructions
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amother
Rose
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Sun, Aug 11 2019, 2:02 pm
I gave birth in the last two weeks and was told to do havadala myself on grape juice and not to fast. I drank water all night but didn't get around to eating until around noon today, which was pretty dumb since I was shaky by then.
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amother
Babyblue
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Sun, Aug 11 2019, 2:21 pm
op, I don't know if this is your situation, but here's what happened with me: I freak out about fasting every time. The freak out is usually dispoportionate to the acctual way I feel during the fast. But every fast I call and ask for a heter anyway because if not I feel angry at religion. I tell the rav that I don't fast well and how am I supposed to mother my children when I am lying in bed, and is that what Hashem wants, that my kids are neglected and I am in bed with a headache? So after that the rav usually tells me that on a minor fast or a nidche, if I am feeling bad enough that I can't get out of bed and take care of my kids then I can break it. And then the fast comes and because I know there is a way out if I feel bad enough, I am able to fast the whole way through. It's like the heter gives me peace of mind to not view G-d as the bad guy I want to rebel against.
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amother
Gray
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Sun, Aug 11 2019, 2:26 pm
My father is a posek. He told me once he just about always gives a heter. The reason is that he figures that any Jewish woman who calls for a heter has Yiras Shamayim, so it must be something serious. So even if it doesn't sound so serious, he'd rather mistakenly give someone a heter than even once cause a problem.
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amother
Cobalt
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Sun, Aug 11 2019, 3:28 pm
I pushed it until now. I had a medical procedure a week ago. Even now I was reluctant to eat, and made dh call my rav to explain that my headache and nausea were not necessarily related to my procedure. The rav literally yelled at dh that I should break it NOW!
So I'm listening....
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amother
Smokey
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Sun, Aug 11 2019, 4:02 pm
Can someone please explain to me how one gets a heter not to fast because they have to watch their kids? There is no pekuach nefesh going on here. Shouldn't one be obligated to hire a babysitter (or two) if one cannot fast well when watching the kids? Let's say my husband insists on a freshly made big meal after the fast that only I can make to his satisfaction and it is too hard for me to prepare it while fasting. Do I get a heter? (this is a rhetorical question.)
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amother
Bronze
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Sun, Aug 11 2019, 7:20 pm
amother [ Silver ] wrote: | Does anyone have a heter to drink water but not eat? I just heard of this from a friend and wondering how common that is.
Or does on tisha bav, drinking count as breaking your fast? |
I work in a medical office with a frum doctor. I know for yom kippur there are many times where he tells patients just to drink based on there medical conditions, sometimes with shiurim sometimes .
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ectomorph
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Sun, Aug 11 2019, 7:40 pm
amother [ Smokey ] wrote: | Can someone please explain to me how one gets a heter not to fast because they have to watch their kids? There is no pekuach nefesh going on here. Shouldn't one be obligated to hire a babysitter (or two) if one cannot fast well when watching the kids? Let's say my husband insists on a freshly made big meal after the fast that only I can make to his satisfaction and it is too hard for me to prepare it while fasting. Do I get a heter? (this is a rhetorical question.) |
Yeah, I was a little thrown by that too. Proud to say I've made it thru! Bh!
Previously I have fasted really poorly.
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amother
Seafoam
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Sun, Aug 11 2019, 10:08 pm
amother [ Bronze ] wrote: | I work in a medical office with a frum doctor. I know for yom kippur there are many times where he tells patients just to drink based on there medical conditions, sometimes with shiurim sometimes . |
Yom Kippur is different than any other fast. I am not allowed to fast ever due to a medical condition and on all other fasts I eat and drink normally but on Yom Kippur I have to drink shiurim of some sort of electrolyte solution. I was told to start from the beginning of the fast and not wait until the morning to avoid dehydration. By the end of Yom Kippur I feel weak and drained but b"h I'm ok medically.
My avoda on Yom Kippur is to "fast" with shiurim and I haven't been to shul or even davened much at all on Yom Kippur in many, many years.
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shanarishona
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Sun, Aug 11 2019, 11:13 pm
I think op that in your situation what you are doing is meritorious
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