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Forum
-> Judaism
amother
OP
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Wed, Oct 16 2019, 1:46 pm
This si the first year Ds is home from learning in yeshiva- our minhag is not eat in the succah- he asked me if he could bring this up with dh as he learned we really should... I worry that this will become an issue- since it is our minhag not to..and I am not sure how dh will react(ds has come home with some interesting chumras). I suggested maybe he speak to his grandfather and go from there...
I am curious if most people do or don't. I googled it and found that we probably should etc..
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DrMom
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Wed, Oct 16 2019, 1:53 pm
We don't.
It's a dfferent holiday; it's not Sukkot.
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amother
Jade
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Wed, Oct 16 2019, 1:55 pm
We are Chabad. We do.
ETA: It always rains on Shemini Atzeres. There is an expression, "How do you know someone is a Chabad Chassid? He drinks even a cup of water in the sukkah on Shemini Atzeres even when it is raining."
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s c
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Wed, Oct 16 2019, 2:00 pm
We eat in succah in the eve and just make kiddish in the succah in the.morning.
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amother
Emerald
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Wed, Oct 16 2019, 2:18 pm
We do.
I don’t think it matters who does and who doesn’t and how common or popular.
You have your minhag. Kids should respect and follow while at home. When away or when married with their own home and family, they can do as they please.
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PinkFridge
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Wed, Oct 16 2019, 2:22 pm
DrMom wrote: | We don't.
It's a dfferent holiday; it's not Sukkot. |
Are there people who eat in the succah in EY the last day?
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grace413
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Wed, Oct 16 2019, 2:26 pm
PinkFridge wrote: | Are there people who eat in the succah in EY the last day? |
No
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mfb
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Wed, Oct 16 2019, 2:27 pm
We do not eat in the sukkah we just make kiddush there on shemini atzeres in the morning.
We are chassidish
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Elfrida
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Wed, Oct 16 2019, 2:30 pm
PinkFridge wrote: | Are there people who eat in the succah in EY the last day? |
No.
בסוכות תשבו שבעת ימים.
The mitzvah is only for the seven days of Sukkot. Not on Shmini Atzeret, which is a different chag. Sitting in the sukkah beyind that becomes an issue of baal tosif. It only gets complicated in Chutz l'aretz where you are trying to define what Chag it is. (And even more complicated when you get chutzniks who are only here short term and have to keep two days Yom Tov is Israel...)
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PinkFridge
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Wed, Oct 16 2019, 2:38 pm
Elfrida wrote: | No.
בסוכות תשבו שבעת ימים.
The mitzvah is only for the seven days of Sukkot. Not on Shmini Atzeret, which is a different chag. Sitting in the sukkah beyind that becomes an issue of baal tosif. It only gets complicated in Chutz l'aretz where you are trying to define what Chag it is. (And even more complicated when you get chutzniks who are only here short term and have to keep two days Yom Tov is Israel...) |
That's what I thought.
Sounds like OP's asking re chu"l.
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DrMom
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Wed, Oct 16 2019, 2:40 pm
PinkFridge wrote: | Are there people who eat in the succah in EY the last day? |
What do you mean here by "the last day?"
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asmileaday
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Wed, Oct 16 2019, 2:41 pm
mfb wrote: | We do not eat in the sukkah we just make kiddush there on shemini atzeres in the morning.
We are chassidish |
Same. I wasn't aware that people eat in the sukkah shemini atzeres. It's not sukkos anymore.
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amother
cornflower
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Wed, Oct 16 2019, 3:54 pm
amother [ Jade ] wrote: | We are Chabad. We do.
ETA: It always rains on Shemini Atzeres. There is an expression, "How do you know someone is a Chabad Chassid? He drinks a cup of water in the sukkah on Shemini Atzeres when it is raining." |
Also Chabad and we also do.
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sub
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Wed, Oct 16 2019, 4:00 pm
mfb wrote: | We do not eat in the sukkah we just make kiddush there on shemini atzeres in the morning.
We are chassidish |
We do a gezengen ( a good bye) with kiddush and mezonos.
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singleagain
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Wed, Oct 16 2019, 4:34 pm
We've always ate in the sukkah on shemini azert. But without the "leshev bsukka" Bracha. Bc it's a safek if it is still sukkot (not in Israel
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amother
Oak
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Wed, Oct 16 2019, 4:46 pm
This is very much minhag dependent and your son should respect the family minhag. Now, it happens to be, outside of EY, it really is preferable to eat in the sukkah on shmini atzeret, but if it not your minhag to do so, the minhag takes precedence. My husband's family has the minhag to only make kiddush the night of SA, no meal, and then he learned more about the halacha and that this minhag is technically "wrong" but he asked his rav and the rav said that while that's true, he should continue to keep his family's minhag.
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perquacky
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Wed, Oct 16 2019, 4:49 pm
s c wrote: | We eat in succah in the eve and just make kiddish in the succah in the.morning. |
Growing up, we did the same.
But dh doesn't, so now I don't.
Not Chassidish, BTW.
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PinkFridge
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Wed, Oct 16 2019, 5:04 pm
DrMom wrote: | What do you mean here by "the last day?" |
The last day of this blessed marathon for Israelis. Shmini Atzeres/Simchas Torah.
No one eats in the succah in chul on ST but many do on Shmini Atzeres.
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amother
Gray
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Wed, Oct 16 2019, 5:40 pm
Shmini atzeret is a separate holiday and there is no mitzvah to do anything in the sukkah at all. Some have the Minhag of eating there on Shmini Atzeret, anyway, and some don’t. Your family’s Minhag is as valid as every other one. Do NOT accept your ds coming in to your home and claiming that you’re wrong and have to change. That is THEIR ignorance showing.
your ds are supposed to continue their father’s minhag, but the sad reality of the away-from-home yeshiva system is that once an institution gets its hooks into a bocher, the hanhala’s aim is to refashion the bocher in its own image. Tell your ds that when they are married and running their own household, they can follow whichever Minhag they like, but as long as they are eating at your table, your Minhag rules.
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amother
Jade
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Wed, Oct 16 2019, 5:56 pm
If it’s intended as a put down of his parents, then perhaps the above advice is good.
But teens rebel. They want to change things, to fix things.
If they want to take on a chumra, why not support them? This is a good rebellion. You don’t have to assume it as a family, but why can’t the teen eat alone in the sukkah if he feels it’s important?
He isn’t doing this to prove he is better, but because he thinks it is the right thing to do. Let him do it!
If you want to tell him that family time is more important, bring up that discussion later. When he runs his own home he’ll have both perspectives to work with.
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