Is it selfish to give a kid an unusual name?

PinkFridge

Wed, Jun 10 2020, 4:22 pm

Scotty wrote:

I have a really weird name and love it because my mom always told me about my great grandmother and what a marvelous person she was, and personally always talked about how lovely the name is and how special it was. I like it because it's unique and makes me feel unique too! Same with my sis who has a heavy duty Yiddish name - my mother made it so special that she likes it enough to drop her 'plain Jane' second (emergency exit) name in favor of the more unusual one.

So possibly it kind of goes according to how you handle it. I love unusual names.

I think there is some difference if it's a family name. Though I know some women with the same European-based name, not related, who have the same Hebrew version of it.
And I don't know if this is true for you, but it probably helps if you have cousins with the same name.

amother

Babyblue

Wed, Jun 10 2020, 4:23 pm

My brother has an unusual name. I've never met anyone else who has his name as a first name.
He has suffered for it. It's not just that it is unusual, but that it got shortened by his friends to particularly off putting version.

He goes by a different name altogether now that has some letters in common.
It wasn't an easy name for him to carry, especially as he had some social challenges.
My mother regrets giving it, even though it is objectively a very beautiful name.

Studious

Wed, Jun 10 2020, 4:38 pm

amother [ Silver ] wrote:

Reminds me of my friend who named her son Ori Yehuda, which I thought was beautiful. I also know someone who just named her daughter תבל, which I found a bit odd.

Ori Yehuda is the name of my husband’s nieces son. Wonder if that’s who you are thinking of...

amother

Indigo

Wed, Jun 10 2020, 5:28 pm

amother [ Smokey ] wrote:

Unusual is subjective.

I'm MO and have a yiddish name. Always hated it. Always wanted to have nice Hebrew name. Then, lo and behold, I did the same thing to my DD - named her after my grandmother, first name Yiddish middle name Hebrew classic tanachi. She goes by her middle name.

IMHO 3 names is too much. I like slightly out of the ordinary Tanachi names.

Some of the modern Hebrew names are just too out there for me.

I agree. In Israel DL or secular, Yocheved or Tuvia would be made fun of by kids for the Savta Yocheved, Saba Tuvia connotation.

SixOfWands

Wed, Jun 10 2020, 5:49 pm

Rappel wrote:

Just kicking ideas around in my head, and I want to hear what others think.

I live in a society where literally anything goes, name-wise. Many names are unisex, like Hadar or Ziv. Some people give their children grandiose, long names - I was at the Brit Milah of a Moshe Chaim Abaye last week, and his neighbor is Menachem Mendel Melech. Others make names up - Sadayel, anyone? I even know a little girl named Orayta.

Having given my first two children longer, more difficult names which we thought were beautiful at the time, I've come to the conclusion that a total name should not be more than 4 syllables, and shouldn't need an explanation. Fine.

But now we're considering name lists, and I find I'm very drawn to certain biblical names, but while they're all tzaddikim, they're not the main characters like Moshe and David. I do think a mother has intuition about a name, but is it fair to give a kid a name that others don't have? Won't people's heads turn, will it be awkward for them? How can I be sure I'm giving my child a good name?

Bshaa tova.

IMNSHO, you can't win for trying. Your child may hate a common name. Your child may hate an unusual name. Your kid may be bullied for an unusual name. Your child may be bullied for a common name. Your child may be bullied for any reason.

Do what you think is best.

BTW, Orayta is a yeshiva in Yerushalayim.

sarahmalka

Wed, Jun 10 2020, 9:14 pm

I'm surprised at how many people are against unusual names. I have an unusual first name (outside of Israel). Yes I was annoyed at how often it got mispronounced growing up but I also got (and still get) tons of compliments on it. As a child and teen, I liked that it made me stand out a little bit from all the Jennifers.

amother

Bisque

Wed, Jun 10 2020, 9:57 pm

sarahmalka wrote:

I thought you were Sarah malka 😀!

amother

Cyan

Wed, Jun 10 2020, 10:31 pm

sarahmalka wrote:

My experience has been similar to yours. My first name is very common in my country of birth, but uncommon in the country where I grew up. I really like it and get lots of compliments. My parents thought about changing it to a common somewhat similar English name when I was young and they didn't because I was vehemently opposed.

amother

Jade

Wed, Jun 10 2020, 11:08 pm

Scotty wrote:

Is your sister called yachet? Very Happy

I totally agree. Some of my sisters have unusual names and love them. Mine is typical and I don't have much feeling towards it.

amother

Yellow

Thu, Jun 11 2020, 12:49 am

I don’t know if it’s about unusual names. I think some people just don’t connect to their name. My first name is medium common but I never like it and never really connected to it. I go by my middle name as an adult and it feels more like me.

Frenchfry

Thu, Jun 11 2020, 8:08 am

amother [ Pearl ] wrote:

On a funnier note, I met a couple in Tzfat who named their son "Arizal" because they didn't realize that the original Rav was Ari Z"L....

gotta do your homework folks! LOL

His name was Yitzchak! Ari stands for Ashkenazi rabbi Yitzchak!

amother

Apricot

Sun, Jun 14 2020, 3:44 am

Frenchfry wrote:

His name was Yitzchak! Ari stands for Ashkenazi rabbi Yitzchak!

While Chabad gives that explanation of the acronym, most say it stands for Eloki Rabbi Yitzchak or Adonenu Rabbi Yitzchak. Both of those are grammatically far more likely than Ashkenazi Rabbi Yitzchak.

Otherwise he would have been הרבי האשכנזי הרב יצחק or רב יצחק הרב האשכנזי.

banana123

Sun, Jun 14 2020, 7:24 am

amother [ Apricot ] wrote:

His name was Yitzchak Luria.

amother

Ginger

Sun, Jun 14 2020, 8:52 am

Please dont give your kid an unusual name . They will suffer because of it. My brother and sil named their baby a common name but with a twist. When they introduce her they have to tell ppl how to pronounce the name it's very strange. The spelling is even stranger than the pronunciation. I dont understand why they would do that to their kid ? They're very anti typical names and they like to be different but dont do it at your kids expense . My poor niece will either be made fun of or will spend her whole life telling ppl how to pronounce her name and how to spell it. Why set a kid up for that kind of life ??

amother

Lavender

Sun, Jun 14 2020, 9:14 am

I guess it depends on how unusual. I work with a lot of secular people and many have unusual names (like literally made-up). Some have names from other cultures, so while they are unheard of in the US, are popular elsewhere. There’s only been a couple names that have made me stop and think “huh?”

One of my kids has an unusual name, but a simple middle name. She could go by her middle name, but goes by her first name and as far as I know, she hasn’t been made fun of or questioned about her name.