S/O would you encourage your short kids to marry taller?

amother

Gold

Mon, Nov 02 2020, 1:26 pm

Quote:

Reish Lakish says: A man who is tall should not marry a woman who is also tall, lest there emerge from them a child who is extremely tall. Similarly, a man who is a dwarf should not marry a woman who is also a dwarf, lest there emerge from them a child who is exceptionally short.

amother

Azure

Mon, Nov 02 2020, 1:49 pm

amother [ Gold ] wrote:

Quote:

Super interesting, thanks

amother

Forestgreen

Mon, Nov 02 2020, 2:40 pm

amother [ Red ] wrote:

That's not how it works. Most short people are short because of an underlying issue either nutrionally or due to a pituitary gland problem. It's not normal to be 5'3 that means a woman did not meet her potential.

Maybe in 3rd world countries.
As the mother of a very petite daughter, I can tell you that most short people in the US are simply short for unexplained or genetic reasons, no issues with nutrition or hormones or anything like that. As told to me by a top pediatric endocrinologist.

amother

Red

Mon, Nov 02 2020, 8:10 pm

amother [ Forestgreen ] wrote:

And a top pediatric endocrinologist told me the opposite.

shabbatiscoming

Tue, Nov 03 2020, 3:31 am

Wow, this thread is super disturbing to me.
Im 4"10. Height never crossed my mind when dating. And I think this is so superficial. I know women who married men who were noticably shirter than them. I know couples where both guy and girl are over 6 ft. I mean, anything goes. Please please op, dont make this a stipulation for shidduchim. The shidduch world seems to be so hard as it is. Dont add height into it.
And thats being said by someone very short.

Amelia Bedelia

Tue, Nov 03 2020, 6:31 am

amother [ Forestgreen ] wrote:

5'3"?!?

amother

Tue, Nov 03 2020, 6:34 am

amother [ Red ] wrote:

And a top pediatric endocrinologist told me the opposite.

What’s the doctor’s name?
Sorry but in the real world, 5’3 is only a bit below average. Maybe your statement stands for people under 5 ft.

amother

Jetblack

Tue, Nov 03 2020, 6:38 am

amother [ Red ] wrote:

I don't know how old they are but you should likely look into why. There is definitely a reason why two average parents who likely reached their potential have children who did not. And you may want to know to be prepared for your grandkids sake.

I am 5.5 1/2" and my dh is 5.11". Our dd is 5' with the help of HGH.
Well guess what, we have short genes and tall genes in our family. Dd seems to have pulled the short genes.
My mom is 5.3" and dad is 6'. So I have short genes in my pool mixed will tall genes.
Dh's mom is 5.7" and dad is 5.7", so he has short genes and tall genes in his pool as well.

amother

Red

Tue, Nov 03 2020, 6:42 am

amother [ OP ] wrote:

What’s the doctor’s name?
Sorry but in the real world, 5’3 is only a bit below average. Maybe your statement stands for people under 5 ft.

Trust me most frum ppl use this doctor so if you've called a referral agency you know his name. And no, he always laughs about that because 5'3 is about 3 or 4 inches less than what the potential should be for a girl. He also said most short people have a reason like neglect or family genes like smallpituitary glands which can be addressed medically. If your family is short, go to an endocrinologist very early (consult at age 2, follow ups) and see a nutrionist. He says it is sort of like braces- people used to think they were cosmetic optional but talk to an orthodontist today and you'll see they almost never are. It's not just cosmetic It's way more than that and it starts much younger. Prople who take their kids for braces at 16 or think they are just cosmetic are misguided, as are ppl who think being 5'3 is ok. it's okay after the fact, but not when it's in your control.

amother

Red

Tue, Nov 03 2020, 6:46 am

amother [ Jetblack ] wrote:

I am 5.5" and my dh is 5.11". Our dd is 5' with the help of HGH.
Well guess what, we have short genes and tall genes in our family. Dd seems to have pulled the short genes.
My mom is 5.3" and dad is 6'. So I have short genes in my pool mixed will tall genes.
Dh's mom is 5.7" and dad is 5.7", so he has short genes and tall genes in his pool as well.

A short gene usually has a medical explanation. Humans as a species have a general height potential, especially after living in a western country for two generations and "short genes" isn't really the answer why. We're learning more but the mindset is wrong about that.

amother

Jetblack

Tue, Nov 03 2020, 6:48 am

amother [ Red ] wrote:

We've been to 2 endocrinologists. There was no medical deficiency they could find. Only one of them was willing to help without a medical issue.

I have brothers who are 6' and brothers who are 5'8". There you go. Dh has the same.

amother

cornflower

Tue, Nov 03 2020, 6:53 am

amother [ Aquamarine ] wrote:

I would encourage my kids to marry someone they can respect, love and be happy with. If age, looks, height, weight and blood type matter to them, they should look for that; if it doesn't, then they don't need to worry about it. I am happy to say that for the most part these things didn't weigh with them within reason. They weren't interested in women five years older AND six inches taller than they are, for which you can't blame a young man in his early 20s. But two years older and three inches taller they'd consider if all else sounded good.

Hey I’d care about blood type before height. One partner being positive and one negative has pregnancy implications.

amother

Lemon

Tue, Nov 03 2020, 6:55 am

Fun fact: did you know that the taller presidential candidate typically wins the election?
Taller people are more likely to be hired for the job. Tall people make more money and are more financially successful. There is a disproportionate amount of tall CEO’s compared to the general population.

amother

cornflower

Tue, Nov 03 2020, 6:55 am

amother [ Sienna ] wrote:

I don't think it's appropriate for you to tell your children what physical attributes the person they have sez with should have

It's none of your business. If they want tall, they will choose tall.

And I'm 5'7 and always wished I was shorter.

If only so I could wear all those dresses, shorter people can wear.

amother

Red

Tue, Nov 03 2020, 6:57 am

amother [ Jetblack ] wrote:

So there is another reason- either something genetic we are not yet aware of or stress, neurologically, poor eating/sleeping habits, viral issues, abuse, neglect, etc. There is a reason why your 5'8 brother did not reach his potential.

amother

Red

Tue, Nov 03 2020, 6:59 am

amother [ cornflower ] wrote:

If only so I could wear all those dresses, shorter people can wear.

Short people don't pull off dresses as a general rule. Or all shoes. Or coats.

BTW re blood type that's only if the mother is negative (like me) and there is a shot so no need to care about that in the modern world.

amother

Lemon

Tue, Nov 03 2020, 7:25 am

amother [ Red ] wrote:

BTW although being tall has many benefits, in regard to life expectancy, shorter people live longer...

There are opposing studies on this. Short people get more heart disease and heart disease is still the number one killer in the world, surpassing cancer.

amother

Lime

Tue, Nov 03 2020, 7:32 am

Some of these comments are making me nauseous.

I’m 5’-2” and totally content with my height. Sure I’d love to be taller and I’d also like to be thinner and I’d also like to be more beautiful. Hmmmm

We have tall genes and short genes in the family. Thankfully I was given the short ones and my brothers were given the tall ones. My parents never thought to take me to an endocrinologist.

When I was dating, I was redt to some very short boys and I had a hard time with it because my father and brothers are tall (5’-10 to 6’-1”) and I felt a taller man has a certain presence. Ended up with a guy who’s 5’-10” and our kids vary in height.

amother

Pewter

Tue, Nov 03 2020, 7:35 am

amother [ Red ] wrote:

You sound insane. There is nothing abnormal or strange about a woman being 5’3.