Do bridesmaids march down by frum Jewish weddings?

essie14

Mon, Apr 26 2021, 11:22 am

amother [ Goldenrod ] wrote:

I've never seen it except at one wedding where the bride and groom were BT MO so I assumed they didn't know what's the norm.

There is no "norm"!
I know hundreds of non BTs who had bridesmaids and groomsmen.
This is going to become a repeat of the wedding cake thread 🙄
It may not be done in some circles, but OP did not specify any particular group she affiliates with.
Plenty of frum weddings have bridesmaids.
There is nothing "non frum" about it

amother

Goldenrod

Mon, Apr 26 2021, 11:28 am

essie14 wrote:

I'm sorry if it came out that way! I'm MO myself but had never seen it before this wedding in NJ that I went to!

Crookshanks

Mon, Apr 26 2021, 11:30 am

essie14 wrote:

To me the word "frum" has yeshivish/chareidi connotations because it's yiddish. That may be why when reading this word in the OP, amother Goldenrod assumed that's what OP meant.

essie14

Mon, Apr 26 2021, 12:12 pm

Crookshanks wrote:

To me the word "frum" has yeshivish/chareidi connotations because it's yiddish. That may be why when reading this word in the OP, amother Goldenrod assumed that's what OP meant.

Everyone on this site is frum, it's one of the rules to be here.
Not everyone is chareidi or yeshivish.

Crookshanks

Mon, Apr 26 2021, 12:22 pm

essie14 wrote:

Everyone on this site is frum, it's one of the rules to be here.
Not everyone is chareidi or yeshivish.

Yes I undestand. I'm explaining why the word "frum" as opposed to the word "religious" or "Orthodox" might bring up those connotations to amother Goldenrod.

amother

Cerulean

Mon, Apr 26 2021, 1:57 pm

"I'm so honored and flattered! I'd love to be your bridesmaid. But I'm going to confess, I've never been a bridesmaid before. Can you give me an idea what you'll expect me to do before the wedding, and on the wedding day."

essie14

Mon, Apr 26 2021, 2:06 pm

amother [ Cerulean ] wrote:

Perfect!

amother

Amber

Mon, Apr 26 2021, 2:21 pm

I grew up yeshivish, made MO friends and was a bridesmaid a couple of times at their weddings. I personally never walked down the aisle, though I know some do have bridesmaids do that. At the weddings I was basically just wearing a color-coordinated gown (fortunately I never had to buy an actually matching dress), being part of a few extra photos, showing up early to help with errands and bustling the gown, and coordinating "friend shtick." The bridesmaids also coordinated the shower and, in some cases, a sheva brachos.

It was very similar to "wearing long" at a yeshivish wedding, frankly, with the exception of the more "official status" at the wedding (which depended- at one wedding we stood behind the kallah at the badeken, at one wedding we had bouquets, at one wedding we got individual as well as group portraits taken because we were considered part of the wedding party). In my experience walking down the aisle is relatively uncommon but also definitely not unheard of. Your daughter's friend who is getting married really should have told her the expectations behind the role when she asked, not just because of this kind of thing but also because it can imply a certain investment of time and money in surrounding events like the shower as well.