Would you dress up a 2 year old boy as a kallah?

gootlfriends

Tue, Jan 04 2022, 8:00 pm

I wouldn't do it. My mother put my nephew in a dress when he was 8 months on Purim. It was funny but my brother in law hated it but was nice about it. We took it off after 2 minutes. If a costume is not gender specific like a construction worker or doctor, then I say go for it. There are plenty of cute costumes. Since the age of 3 my son has requested only boy costumes or gender neutral and he has grown up with only sisters. He refused to wear a costume before that. He actually wanted to dress "like daddy" at 2.

amother

Tue, Jan 04 2022, 8:06 pm

amother [ Ruby ] wrote:

I have twins kh..they were in nursery together..one week my ds was picked as the shabbos Imma. I wrote them a note and said if you need a shabbos Imma.. pick his twin sister. When you need a shabbos Abba you can pick him!

you must be one of those mothers... Please dont send to my playgroup.

amother

Fern

Tue, Jan 04 2022, 8:08 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

you must be one of those mothers... Please dont send to my playgroup.

I didn't read the whole thread but I guess I'm one of those mothers too. (Though I have a playgroup as well and I know what those mothers are actually like).

I would NEVER dress my son up in a girly thing unless he begged to. I'm a little weirded out that it seems common to do it.

helpful

Tue, Jan 04 2022, 8:08 pm

As far as hashkafa, ask your own lor, but I think it's ok... purim is vnahapoch hu...
As far as fashion, I don't like the look, so I wouldn't do it.

amother

Honeydew

Tue, Jan 04 2022, 8:12 pm

BrisketBoss wrote:

Are you against animal costumes and superhero costumes and character costumes?

No
Bec no kid is a super hero or animal. It isn’t specific to gender. Is the monkey a male or female?
I wouldn’t dress a girl like a cow boy but would a cow girl.
I wouldn’t dress a boy like a Disney princess.

m1122

Tue, Jan 04 2022, 8:16 pm

flowerpower wrote:

Why?

I am someone different, but I do not think it would be age-appropriate. I would not dress a 2 yo boy as a chosson either.

amother

Eggshell

Tue, Jan 04 2022, 8:47 pm

agreer wrote:

No, it's not assur for a 2 year old.

It's assur for a 20 year old.

2 year olds can do whatever they want. If they want to dress as a kallah, they can.

Are you sure about it not being assur?

And also, even if it happens to not be assur, considering all the craziness in the world WHY would you do that to your son? Even if 100 years ago this would be no big deal and funny, I feel like now we should be more careful.

imasinger

Tue, Jan 04 2022, 8:49 pm

If a boy below the age of chinuch wanted this for himself, I think it's fine to support him.

But for a parent to dress a boy as a kallah because of her unfulfilled longing to dress up and have a baby girl, seems a bit problematic.

#BestBubby

Tue, Jan 04 2022, 8:53 pm

amother [ Blonde ] wrote:

Why are 2 year old girls allowed to wear pants?

Pants are not considered masculine today.

There are pink pants made for girls.

But dresses are strictly female - I don't care what the crazies say.

BrisketBoss

Tue, Jan 04 2022, 9:01 pm

#BestBubby wrote:

Pants are not considered masculine today.

There are pink pants made for girls.

But dresses are strictly female - I don't care what the crazies say.

The color of pants is not what makes them feminine.

ShishKabob

Wed, Jan 05 2022, 11:09 am

I would dress up a 2 year old boy as a kallah, only on Purim though, not during the rest of the year.

momsrus

Wed, Jan 05 2022, 11:28 am

ShishKabob wrote:

I would dress up a 2 year old boy as a kallah, only on Purim though, not during the rest of the year.

and a girl you would dress up as a kalla the rest of the year?

ShishKabob

Wed, Jan 05 2022, 11:41 am

momsrus wrote:

and a girl you would dress up as a kalla the rest of the year?

Yes, what's the problem with it?

amother

Tealblue

Wed, Jan 05 2022, 11:45 am

amother [ Ruby ] wrote:

A playgroup morah picked a boy to be shabbos ima??? That is the strangest thing I ever heard.

dena613

Wed, Jan 05 2022, 11:50 am

amother [ OP ] wrote:

you must be one of those mothers... Please dont send to my playgroup.

Why in the world, if you have a playgroup of both boys and girls, would you choose a boy as a shabbos mommy!!???

OP, I'm sorry, this is seriously concerning.

No, I wouldn't send to your playgroup if I knew that.

Dressing a 2yo like you stated in first post, I wouldn't do, but I wouldn't be horrified.

But reversing genders for shabbos mommy and tatty?
Yes, I'm horrified.

ShishKabob

Wed, Jan 05 2022, 11:53 am

dena613 wrote:

Something sounds off here.

dena613

Wed, Jan 05 2022, 12:03 pm

ShishKabob wrote:

Something sounds off here.

Off abt me, or off abt normalizing using boys as shabbos ema?

amother

Tan

Wed, Jan 05 2022, 12:30 pm

amother [ Honeydew ] wrote:

I guess it’s ask your LOR
Mine also says assur. Cannot dress boy clothing designed specifically for girls.
Obviously everyone should ask their own. But please don’t tell ppl halacha.

To op
Personally I think you should love and appreciate your son for who he is and not try to make him into something he is not. He is a miracle that is a boy and should be lived for that.

My LOR says no as well, even for a baby, even on Purim, so nope, I wouldn't.

ShishKabob

Wed, Jan 05 2022, 12:32 pm

dena613 wrote:

Off abt me, or off abt normalizing using boys as shabbos ema?

Off about normalizing using boys as Shabbos Ima. Of course not about you!

amother

Wed, Jan 05 2022, 1:49 pm

dena613 wrote:

I dont actually have a playgroup.
I have infants and dont do shabbos ima or aba. Just sounds like your the kind of person who drives the babysitter nuts about why the baby is playing with a nonkosher animal toy. Or something like that.