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-> Parenting our children
amother
Powderblue
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Wed, Jul 06 2022, 9:32 pm
Build forts and tents out of pillows, chairs, blankets
Make things out of cardboard boxes
Photograph objects with an old camera
Bake or cook
Games like hide and seek, mother may I , hide the object etc
Make believe games
Collect rocks, sea shells etc
Scavenger hunt
Excercise , dance, yoga , aerobics , swimming
Fishing
Wood work
Planting or gardening
Look after a pet
Races
Obstacle course
Charades
Science Experiments
Exploring
Music, play an instrument
Word finds , crossword puzzles etc
Dress up
Climbing
Gymnastics
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amother
OP
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Wed, Jul 06 2022, 11:17 pm
Thanks for all these ideas!
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amother
Moccasin
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Wed, Jul 06 2022, 11:34 pm
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amother
Azalea
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Wed, Jul 06 2022, 11:42 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote: | Water play
Chalk
Jump rope
Balls
Swimming
Planting
Crafts with one type of thing at a time
Books/reading
Writing letters
Calling up Bubby |
Most of these are not indoor. A lot of them are adult dependent. Calling up Bubby just shifts the onus to entertain her to Bubby and also doesn't absorb much time.
You can do it by stimulating their imagination so that they don't need so many things. They can imagine things instead. Also by challenging her to do certain things. (Can you walk around the table backwards singing shalom aleichem)
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amother
Glitter
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Wed, Jul 06 2022, 11:46 pm
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amother
OP
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Thu, Jul 07 2022, 8:28 am
amother [ Azalea ] wrote: | Most of these are not indoor. A lot of them are adult dependent. Calling up Bubby just shifts the onus to entertain her to Bubby and also doesn't absorb much time.
You can do it by stimulating their imagination so that they don't need so many things. They can imagine things instead. Also by challenging her to do certain things. (Can you walk around the table backwards singing shalom aleichem) |
That's a cute one-walk around the table backwards. She's definitely in the stage of experimenting with her body. The age of skipping, jumping, trying to see how many steps she can jump down at once etc...
Also I don't mind doing things with her. I find that doing a fun activity can energize me while cleaning up (chore) can deplete me (within reason)
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Raisin
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Thu, Jul 07 2022, 8:46 am
amother [ OP ] wrote: | I started cleaning up and she told me which toys to leave out. I told her that I can't because too hard for Mommy to clean and I understand that she doesn't want to clean up. All of a sudden she was all over me cleaning up and promising to clean up every toy she plays with! Lol. And bragging to everyone how she cleaned up and that from now on she plans to clean up all her toys! |
There you go!!! I wish my kid played like your daughter, it sounds amazing. I remember playing like that when I was a kid. We didn't have a lot of toys but I would take lego, chess peices, whatever and lay creative games which involved castles (from the lego) and princesses. (chess pcs)
I would live with the mess (easier said than done) but as you can see putting your foot down is working!
If she doesn't clean up really do take away some toys.
You are teaching her great life skills.
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amother
OP
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Thu, Jul 07 2022, 8:51 am
Raisin wrote: | There you go!!! I wish my kid played like your daughter, it sounds amazing. I remember playing like that when I was a kid. We didn't have a lot of toys but I would take lego, chess peices, whatever and lay creative games which involved castles (from the lego) and princesses. (chess pcs)
I would live with the mess (easier said than done) but as you can see putting your foot down is working!
If she doesn't clean up really do take away some toys.
You are teaching her great life skills. |
Thank you! It only worked because I really was ok with her not cleaning up. I told her that I totally understand that it's hard to clean up and we can put them away for a bit to make it easier for everyone.
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PinkFridge
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Thu, Jul 07 2022, 2:04 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote: | Shabbos I would definitely pull out more toys.
I didn't say that it needs to be indoors or shabbos and that it needs minimal or no supervision.
For example I like giving her pearler beads because it takes a long time to do it and I don't mind ironing it and it's a nice activity.
I also bake with her but not more than once a week because it can be a bit draining. |
I'm thinking about long Shabbos days, or heatwaves. Or if you just need time off and don't want an activity that must have your input. (I guess I'm projecting )
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amother
OP
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Thu, Jul 07 2022, 2:22 pm
PinkFridge wrote: | I'm thinking about long Shabbos days, or heatwaves. Or if you just need time off and don't want an activity that must have your input. (I guess I'm projecting ) |
Honestly, we have a TON of toys. I've been to many houses. On average most ppl have about a fifth of our toys for about 5 times as many kids. I always wonder what these kids do all day. I really thought I would get a lot of honest answers from many Mommies who's kids are not so toy dependent!
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lamplighter
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Thu, Jul 07 2022, 2:44 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote: | Honestly, we have a TON of toys. I've been to many houses. On average most ppl have about a fifth of our toys for about 5 times as many kids. I always wonder what these kids do all day. I really thought I would get a lot of honest answers from many Mommies who's kids are not so toy dependent! |
In many families five times your size, they play with each other and less so with toys.....
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amother
OP
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Thu, Jul 07 2022, 2:47 pm
lamplighter wrote: | In many families five times your size, they play with each other and less so with toys..... |
Ouch
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lamplighter
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Thu, Jul 07 2022, 2:58 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote: | Ouch |
I didn't mean to say anything hurtful, I was answering your question honestly.
I don't want to discuss here publicly but I don't have the big family that plays together in my house. I know it's not easy being your child's playmate. I just was explaining why there's this hole in your query.... People who have large families and few toys are not because their kids are doing other magic activities, it's because they play with their siblings or there is just a lot going on so they aren't as bored.
I'm so sorry for hurting you or causing you pain. There was zero malice in my post.
Last edited by lamplighter on Thu, Jul 07 2022, 3:20 pm; edited 1 time in total
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imaima
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Thu, Jul 07 2022, 3:05 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote: | Honestly, we have a TON of toys. I've been to many houses. On average most ppl have about a fifth of our toys for about 5 times as many kids. I always wonder what these kids do all day. I really thought I would get a lot of honest answers from many Mommies who's kids are not so toy dependent! |
Seriously OP you are unrealistic to expect your dd not to play with toys just because the clean up is difficult. What in the world is „toy dependent“? What IS she supposed to be doing at her age if not play with toys?
What kind of a childhood is she supposed to have?
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amother
OP
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Thu, Jul 07 2022, 3:19 pm
lamplighter wrote: | I didn't mean to say anything hurtful, I was answering your question honestly.
I don't want to discuss here publicly but I don't have the big family that plays together in my house. I know it's not easy being your child's playmate. I just was explaining why there's this hole in your query.... People who have large families and few toys are not because their kids are doing other magic activities, it's because they play with their siblings or there is just a lot going on.
I'm so sorry for hurting you or causing you pain. There was zero malice in my post. |
Thanks for explaining.
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PinkFridge
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Thu, Jul 07 2022, 3:28 pm
imaima wrote: | Seriously OP you are unrealistic to expect your dd not to play with toys just because the clean up is difficult. What in the world is „toy dependent“? What IS she supposed to be doing at her age if not play with toys?
What kind of a childhood is she supposed to have? |
It sounds like she's having a lovely childhood with a very engaged mommy who's offering her tremendously enriching experiences.
It sounds like her mommy's experiencing things so many other have in different ways:
The mother who's fed up with laundry so either buys enough clothes to last 2 weeks, or keeps clothes to a minimum. Who buys one color socks for each child so pairing is streamlined.
Or the character in a novel I got who davka had a very small car even though it meant she lived in her car chauffeuring kids because she couldn't countenance driving more than 3 children (her+one more, IIRC) at a time.
We ALL had or have our days where we approach that line in the sand. It's not always easy to be empathetic as a person nears hers.
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imaima
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Thu, Jul 07 2022, 5:03 pm
PinkFridge wrote: | It sounds like she's having a lovely childhood with a very engaged mommy who's offering her tremendously enriching experiences.
It sounds like her mommy's experiencing things so many other have in different ways:
The mother who's fed up with laundry so either buys enough clothes to last 2 weeks, or keeps clothes to a minimum. Who buys one color socks for each child so pairing is streamlined.
Or the character in a novel I got who davka had a very small car even though it meant she lived in her car chauffeuring kids because she couldn't countenance driving more than 3 children (her+one more, IIRC) at a time.
We ALL had or have our days where we approach that line in the sand. It's not always easy to be empathetic as a person nears hers. |
The mothers from the second paragraph don’t spend they entire days playing with one child.
I don’t see how OP approaches her line in the sand if she is ready to do anything other than clean up the toys.
I have to scratch my head to the idea of forbidding creative independent play with toys in favor or something „clean“. It is so amazing that she does it!
As far as the amount of toys in other families, kids will play with any amount you give them. If there are no toys, they will play with objects that will still have to be put away at the end of the day (or not).
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amother
OP
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Thu, Jul 07 2022, 5:11 pm
imaima wrote: | The mothers from the second paragraph don’t spend they entire days playing with one child.
I don’t see how OP approaches her line in the sand if she is ready to do anything other than clean up the toys.
I have to scratch my head to the idea of forbidding creative independent play with toys in favor or something „clean“. It is so amazing that she does it!
As far as the amount of toys in other families, kids will play with any amount you give them. If there are no toys, they will play with objects that will still have to be put away at the end of the day (or not). |
I did give her the choice if she wants to clean up or have her toys be away. When she saw the toys going away she t started helping me clean up and promised to clean up after each toy and we brainstormed ways that it isn't overwhelming. She is 6. Not 3. This is age appropriate. At her age I don't need to be cleaning up every toy and micromanaging her play. And yes, for me I rather take out crafts and bake with her or have her play with a friend. The world doesn't fall apart if a child doesn't have a mountain of toys to play with. The toys situation was not manageable. I couldn't walk into her room. Toys were breaking as we were stepping on them. This was the right approach for my family today. Judge away.
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PinkFridge
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Thu, Jul 07 2022, 5:25 pm
imaima wrote: | The mothers from the second paragraph don’t spend they entire days playing with one child.
I don’t see how OP approaches her line in the sand if she is ready to do anything other than clean up the toys.
I have to scratch my head to the idea of forbidding creative independent play with toys in favor or something „clean“. It is so amazing that she does it!
As far as the amount of toys in other families, kids will play with any amount you give them. If there are no toys, they will play with objects that will still have to be put away at the end of the day (or not). |
I don't think I would be doing what OP wants to do either. But my point is, people have done dramatic things when they get fed up. For OP, it's dramatically restricting toys. No, many of us wouldn't do it. But I can be empathetic.
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PinkFridge
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Thu, Jul 07 2022, 5:27 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote: | I did give her the choice if she wants to clean up or have her toys be away. When she saw the toys going away she t started helping me clean up and promised to clean up after each toy and we brainstormed ways that it isn't overwhelming. She is 6. Not 3. This is age appropriate. At her age I don't need to be cleaning up every toy and micromanaging her play. And yes, for me I rather take out crafts and bake with her or have her play with a friend. The world doesn't fall apart if a child doesn't have a mountain of toys to play with. The toys situation was not manageable. I couldn't walk into her room. Toys were breaking as we were stepping on them. This was the right approach for my family today. Judge away. |
It worked! I hope it continues to.
Your child is loved and being given a wonderful environment to thrive in. I can't imagine anyone reading all 4 pages and thinking otherwise. Kol hakavod!
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