Did a/o NOT get tips?

amother

Turquoise

Thu, Dec 22 2022, 1:37 pm

keym wrote:

Should we start tipping pediatricians and dentists who take Medicaid because they're getting reimbursed a lot less than private-pay doctors.

This is just rude. Do pediatrician and dentists plan weekly or biweekly sessions, individualized for your kids? Do they advocate for your child at school so their needs are met and they can function best? Do they communicate regularly with you and discuss concerns as needed? Do they come up with plans for adaptations and interventions or educate school staff? How much time are they actually giving you? Ime, not very much at all.

And personally, if I had a dr that did all (or even some) of the things I listed above, I did give them a gift to show my appreciation.

amother

Mintgreen

Thu, Dec 22 2022, 1:40 pm

amother Nasturtium wrote:

It's true that we see your children less than the teacher does. But then why do parents demand more of us than they do of teachers? I have parents who expect monthly phone calls. Yet they would never expect the teacher to make monthly phone calls.

I have 25 students. When in the world am I supposed to making 25 phone calls a month? I work during the school day, plus extra sessions in the evenings and on sundays.

Exactly. If you don't feel the need to show appreciation it's ok but then stop expecting therapists and tutors to do all that extra work for you. You can't have it both ways, it just isn't fair. And of course it's always the parents who "get it" and don't make you crazy who remember you Chanukah time.

keym

Thu, Dec 22 2022, 1:41 pm

amother Turquoise wrote:

My point is not to compare doctors to therapists.

My point is that we expect a Medicaid Dr to perform his job, and we don't expect to tip a Medicaid Dr because he makes less than a private Dr.

It's not fair to expect parents to tip an agency therapist because they make less than a non-agency therapist.

amother

Silver

Thu, Dec 22 2022, 1:45 pm

amother Opal wrote:

Those of us not on medicaid have copays and coinsurance. I pay plenty for therapy through agencies.

I paid $125 for 45 min of OT for my son. I have Oxford insurance, and an incredibly high deductible, so practically speaking my insurance doesnt cover any therapy.

amother

Nasturtium

Thu, Dec 22 2022, 1:46 pm

keym wrote:

So then why do teachers in private school expect tips because they make less than teachers in public school?

amother

Nasturtium

Thu, Dec 22 2022, 1:50 pm

keym wrote:

Personally, I have lower expectations of a Medicaid doctor than I do of doctors who take private insurance. I actually rarely use Medicaid doctors anymore, because the private insurance ones are much, much better (this is a topic for another thread but I have lots of examples).

So by the same token, parents should have lower expectations of agency therapists than of private pay therapists. We get paid peanuts, and need to take on a huge amount of students to make a somewhat decent income. So no, we are not going to have much time to properly prepare for sessions and communicate with parents. We are also not going to be doing great therapy when we are tired and burned out from a doing a million sessions back to back

keym

Thu, Dec 22 2022, 1:52 pm

amother Nasturtium wrote:

So then why do teachers in private school expect tips because they make less than teachers in public school?

I would have the same comment about a teacher who EXPECTS a tip.
That in this environment, it's unfair and obnoxious.

However, most people I know don't tip because the teacher EXPECTS it, they tip out of a sense of hakaras hatov as much as their budget allows.
First comes the Rebbi who spends 30 hours a week with the child, next comes the Morah who spends 15 hours and on and on. The therapist who spends 45 minutes a week with the child, there may just not be the money available anymore.
It's not personal.

amother

Mintgreen

Thu, Dec 22 2022, 1:54 pm

amother Nasturtium wrote:

So then why do teachers in private school expect tips because they make less than teachers in public school?

Good point. There is an inyan to tip a rebbi but not a morah, and certainly not an English teacher or playgroup morah. So by this logic the tipping should be abolished for everyone but the rebbeim.

Btw this whole thread is a good explanation of why agencies are so short staffed and only getting worse. Not only do you get paid the same amount moros do, you don't get tuition discounts or tips.

amother

Springgreen

Thu, Dec 22 2022, 1:55 pm

amother Nasturtium wrote:

We actually make pretty much the same as teachers do. I have friends and family members who are morahs and I have compared actual numbers with them.

Therapists get paid hourly, and don't get paid for any off days or when kids are sick. And most schools don't allow us to start right at the beginning of the school year, so we lose out a lot in September. So it basically evens out with what a teacher makes.

My dd is not in school yet, but when she is it may be worthwhile for me to become a morah. Most schools offer a generous tuition break if you teach in your child's school. But they won't offer that break to the "rich" speech therapist.

Not all therapists make so little. There are higher paying, salaried jobs with less flexibility.

amother

Mintgreen

Thu, Dec 22 2022, 1:55 pm

keym wrote:

The therapist who spends 45 minutes a week with the child, there may just not be the money available anymore.
It's not personal.

45 minutes one on one or with a small group. Plus creating a specialized plan for your child, and all the time you keep them on the phone. You can't compare to a teacher where your child is one of 30.

amother

Nasturtium

Thu, Dec 22 2022, 1:58 pm

amother Springgreen wrote:

Not all therapists make so little. There are higher paying, salaried jobs with less flexibility.

True. But that is not what OP is discussing here. She is discussing therapists who are not salaried but are not getting tips.

And the salaried positions are generally not available in the frum schools. So if your child is getting therapy in a frum school, then most likely the parent isn't paying anything.

amother

Turquoise

Thu, Dec 22 2022, 1:58 pm

keym wrote:

I think this is a strange comparison altogether.

Re the bolded- this is incorrect. No one is expecting parents to tip/gift to make up any income. I don't think income has anything to do with it. At least that's my understanding. However, when a therapist works in a school, just like the school teachers/rebbes, day in, day out, and they are putting in a lot of time and energy, specially, specifically, to individually help your child and your child alone, I think it is very dismissive to ignore the work they are putting in to help your child.

If you don't like them, don't think they are helping, don't have money... etc.... like I said before, everyone is entitled to make their own $ decisions. But at least recognize that they are working with your child and trying to help. And if you disagree, you can always stop having them go to therapy.

amother

Obsidian

Thu, Dec 22 2022, 1:58 pm

A similar thread came up last tipping season and I explained there why (school) therapists aren't a parents priority.

When my daughter was in primary she was eligible for speech because she said a subtle th instead of s. I had already had her evaluated by a very well versed SLP with years of experience who told me it's a non issue and will self resolve soon. The school meanwhile was like its free and the girls love it, so I agreed to let her get pulled out.
So yes it's true that my daughter was going out but I felt no need to tip. The school was literally looking to fill their slp slots in order to give them parnassa.
I won't go so far as to say I was doing the slp a favor but I definitely don't feel that I have to go out and tip her for a service we did not really need.

amother

Opal

Thu, Dec 22 2022, 1:59 pm

amother Nasturtium wrote:

I don't agree. I was on medicaid for a bit and now I have excellent private insurance. I pay through the nose and still have copays and coinsurance and it's never ending but that's a different discussion. Firstly hardly any doctor wants to take my insurance and it's a top insurance. Secondly I have yet to find a doctor that even measures up to my medicaid doctors. They were all phenomenal every last one of them. I am so disappointed that I can't use any of them anymore. I have always heard this medicaid doctor business but I am seeing the opposite with my own eyes.

amother

Opal

Thu, Dec 22 2022, 2:01 pm

keym wrote:

Turns out they make more. My excellent insurance pays a way lower rate than medicaid does. All the doctors I loved took medicaid happily and tell me my insurance is a joke and they refuse to treat me for these measly payments. And this is top insurance.

keym

Thu, Dec 22 2022, 2:04 pm

amother Turquoise wrote:

I can agree with that.
What bothers me is the entitlement.

That the "thank you morah" that I write on the homework notebook isn't good enough.

What I'm getting from these threads is that no, they make so little, they deserve a tip.

And you know, I can't keep up. It's very rarely just 1 therapist, but multiple. And a card is not enough. Not really.
A chocolate bar isn't enough.
I'm hearing a kvetching that comes out.
It's making it really hard to feel like what I can afford to give is actually enough.

amother

Nasturtium

Thu, Dec 22 2022, 2:06 pm

amother Obsidian wrote:

That is very strange. Most schools are desperate for more therapists, and they have many students not getting therapy because there aren't enough therapists.
I filled up my caseload easily the first week of school, and the parents and school are begging me to take on more cases. I would never take on a case if the parent doesn't want therapy. I had two parents who recently wanted to stop therapy, so I dropped those students and replaced them the same day with new students. I don't know any SLP who is desperate for cases to have parnassah.
Your situation sounds very unusual

amother

Daisy

Thu, Dec 22 2022, 2:07 pm

My son's school collected $30/per child. I paid the $30 but I have no idea how the money will be presented to his morahs. So my husband and I sat down last night and wrote out thank you cards included tips. Not so much... $25/each for the three aids and $75 for the main morah. Separately, I am giving $150 cash bonus to my daughter's babysitter.