DD struggling socially

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Forum -> Parenting our children -> School age children

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amother

Wed, Dec 06 2023, 6:31 am

DD is in 5th grade. She used to hang out with 3 girls in her class, her best friend and 2 others, and was very happy socially.

The group gradually fell apart including her former best friend. She is finding it really difficult to make other friends and although she joins in class games at recess, she really wants a close friend to chat with.

We've tried playdates and she does a lot of extracurricular activities.

Any advice?

oneofakind

Wed, Dec 06 2023, 8:11 am

It takes time to develop. Any of those playdates reciprocated? Anybody who doesn't have a BFF or close group who would be interested in becoming closer with your daughter? If so, do something special with them. Invite for a special activity or outing. Give them something they can schmooze about in school also. study together after school.

amother

Wed, Dec 06 2023, 8:21 am

Thanks. There seem to be a lot of groups and friendships already in the class. She is friendly with a number of girls but doesn'tseem to be able to become part of a new group or make a consistent friend. I will keep trying with the playdates.

Chayalle

Wed, Dec 06 2023, 8:22 am

Just know it's very normal for the age.
My DD's class was split up in 5th grade, and she was not put with her friends. She really had a hard time, but gradually made some friends during the rest of elementary school, though it was never the same.
Then she went to high school and it's been like a social explosion (I have to remind myself I prayed for this). Don't know where the child is sometimes, cuz she started out at Penina's house, but then they got a ride to Esty, and the three of them decided to join the party at Chaya, and it can drive me insane sometimes tracking her down.....if she's home, it's on the phone....
Advice is - be patient, do alot of listening, help her along, but don't try to micromanage or control, it doesn't work anymore at this age. Do encourage her to reach out to new friends (needing notes or the homework is a great excuse to start a friendship.....)

amother

Wed, Dec 06 2023, 8:27 am

Thanks Chayalle that is reassuring. She does cheer up after she's vented so that is good and I'll keep encouraging her to stick with it.

amother

Tanzanite

Wed, Dec 06 2023, 8:38 am

amother OP wrote:

Its hard and very common in 5th.

Happens again in 10th.

Just takes time. As long as no bullying and she seems socially with it not much to do but wait.

Hugs.

amother

Tanzanite

Wed, Dec 06 2023, 8:38 am

amother OP wrote:

Its hard and very common in 5th.

Happens again in 10th.

Just takes time. As long as no bullying and she seems socially with it not much to do but wait.

Hugs.

amother

Wed, Dec 06 2023, 9:16 am

Thanks Tanzanite.

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