Foreign parents of Israeli born children

amother

Cappuccino

Wed, Dec 27 2023, 4:20 am

amother Mintgreen wrote:

My kids (3-9) all say r like w and I think most say th like t. I don't think they sound unintelligent, more like babyish when they speak English (which 3-7 do a lot). Ds9 stopped speaking English except to grandparents and once when he called from school bc he forgot something and didn't want everyone to understand. But it's very difficult for their grandparents to understand them because of it, and I do wish I could help them fix it. I've tried and they kind of get th with a lot of effort, but r I just have not managed.

Cappuccino, where did you take your kids- a private American speech therapist? How did you find them? And they took 2 kids for the price of 1, or you paid for both separately? I'm curious if I could swing this financially, but I'm also outside Jerusalem so I'm not sure it's easily accessible enough here to be worth it for me right now.

As for my answer to this thread, like I said, I did try to teach them the correct sounds. They just don't get it... But it's not that they say r like ר. They get that they're different automatically, don't need to be taught that. They just can't say it correctly. Someone once told me she actually told her kids to say r like ר instead of w so they sound like foreigners to English instead of babies.

You're right that I meant they sound babyish rather than unintelligent, although at the teen ages, it does kind of mean the same thing at some level.

I went to a speech therapist in RBS. I went for one kid for several articulation issues, and the second kid came along because it was after gan hours. And listened and learned. (The therapist didn't work with him directly.)

Truth is that you may be able to work on it without a speech therapist. Idea is to put the two index fingers in the mouth touching the molars and shape the mouth as though saying a long e sound, and because of the fingers, the tongue needs to move backward and will say the R. There are also some YouTube videos on it. In my experience, once a kid gets it, if they have any motivation, they should be good. Good luck!

amother

Snapdragon

Wed, Dec 27 2023, 4:22 am

I grew up in Israel to American parents. I have two siblings that had learning disabilities and their English is weaker than the rest of us. They also married more Israeli spouses. The rest have both spoken and written English no different than any other American but not corporate English. (Lawyers type of writing).
English is very important as it opens doors globally. I now live in America with a Very good job and I would never be able to have this without the investment my parents put towards it. An accent isn’t as important as the actual language.

amother

Mintgreen

Wed, Dec 27 2023, 4:30 am

amother Cappuccino wrote:

Cool, thanks! I can't wait to try that index finger trick when my kids come home. I read that I should look with them in the mirror so they could copy the shape my lips make, and it kind of worked with 1 kid, but really not. She curled her lips, but just made a funny sound and it doesn't really work naturally. I just tried this way and I see how it could work.

amother

Cappuccino

Wed, Dec 27 2023, 4:48 am

Just wanted to clarify, since I saw someone hugged my post.

We live here and it's number one important that our kids speak and read and write Hebrew fluently. If there is an accent in their Hebrew, no one will hold it against them. Of course, I'd try to make sure they can say all the consonant and vowel sounds (one child with special needs is having trouble with the chet and I am paying $$$ to teach them the right sound, but it's hard for them). The inflection/accent itself is not a big issue as I see it.

Since our family is English speaking, many in our community speak English, and English is so important jobwise, I also think it's important for our kids to know how to say all the sounds in English, as much as possible. My husband had a boy in his class in chul who leined "vayomew avwaham". It was painful to listen to and the parents only realized that at his bar mitzva and took him for speech therapy afterward and he learned the R sound. If my kids are capable of learning the R, why wouldn't I want to help them with it. Just as I pay for other things to help them succeed socially and in long term life, this is something that I choose to pay for also.

But I totally understand if someone simply doesn't have the funds to pay for it, or feels that their kid won't ever be using English and therefore it doesn't matter if their child sounds babyish when speaking English. And of course, no matter how much intervention, some kids can't learn this for external reasons.

amother

Firethorn

Wed, Dec 27 2023, 5:32 am

Another factor in my kids accent is my accent and my husband's accent. (As a reminder, my kids pronounce all the letters correctly in both languages, however they still have slight accents in each language, even though they were born here). My husband and I are both American, even from nearby states, so we grew up with similar accents. However DH has been in Israel since 7th grade and I came after highschool at 18. I have been in Israel for over 2 decades and DH has been here for over 3 decades. Both DH and I still sound American, but our American accents have really gotten lighter over the years (I.e., you wouldn't necessarily guess what state or area we are from. But I wasn't aware of this myself, people have told me). Not like we sound more Israeli, we just sound less strongly American. Plus other aspects of our speech or knowing Hebrew also seep into our English. So if our kids mainly learn English from us, they wouldn't sound like they came from NJ or NY, they sound less distinct. Maybe if we were fresh off the boat it would be different, but, our American accents were already more faded by the time we had kids. Interestingly, when my kids spend time with relatives from the midwest, their American accents sound more midwest, even though DH and I don't sound that way at all.

But we definitely tried to help their accents, but neither of us sounds totally Israeli in Hebrew or totally American in English anymore, even though our kids spend plenty of time with grandparents with strong American accents and school with everyone having Israeli accented Hebrew. I don't know why their accents are just a bit non-native sounding in both languages, especially as I can't hear the difference.

ima_bima

Wed, Dec 27 2023, 5:59 am

I'm a native English speaker, DH isn't (but speaks on a high level). Our daily life is only through Hebrew. Arguments in English lol. Tbh teaching English isn't high enough on my priorities for me to invest in it, at least at this stage in life. There are little to no English speakers where I live.

As an aside, who cares about accents? I don't. My kids were born in Israel. Let them sound Israeli!

amother

Mintgreen

Wed, Dec 27 2023, 8:33 am

Elfrida wrote:

Assuming that she is also the OP of the other thread, she claimed there that she speaks Hebrew with a perfect Israeli accent, having acquired this in ulpan.

Interesting... I know my father always claims to be really good with accents, and says he can say people's names the way they say it even if it's foreign, and it sounds pretty ridiculous. Like I said, my kids have been speaking and hearing mother-tongue English from birth, most didn't go to any babysitter or anything until 2, and they still definitely don't sound American.

I tried teaching them "r" just before with fingers in their mouths. It kind of worked, but dd7 curling her lips sounded way more natural, but not natural at the same time. They were not convinced of the trick. Maybe I'll try again later with other words and see if it does anything. They know what the sound should sound like, they just can't seem to make it themselves.

amother

Green

Sun, Dec 31 2023, 1:27 pm

Elfrida wrote:

Assuming that she is also the OP of the other thread, she claimed there that she speaks Hebrew with a perfect Israeli accent, having acquired this in ulpan.

Is it possible to not have an accent at all? DH grew up in chul with Israeli Hebrew-speaking parents. We've been in Israel close to 20 years now. People have commented that when he speaks Hebrew, he doesn't sound American but not a native Hebrew speaker ether

amother

Ecru

Sun, Dec 31 2023, 1:41 pm

Maybe it’s just me but I like hearing people’s accents. When I hear all the different ways people speak Hebrew it gives me this warm kibbutz galuyot feeling.
American, British, French, Russian, South African, Italian, they all bring a hint (or more Very Happy

) of their mother tongue into the language that unites all of us.
What a bore if we all looked the same, sounded the same and thought the same.
There are always some natives in any country who look down at people speaking their language with a heavy foreign accent, but I feel there’s a certain lack of intelligence behind that attitude that makes the judger look dumb.
If you have an accent, own it and let people enjoy hearing you bring your own unique personality and experiences into the conversation.

amother

Tuberose

Sun, Dec 31 2023, 4:07 pm

amother Green wrote:

It's definitely possible!!
I sound native in another language! When I wasin a new place in that country and people were just getting to know me, people assumed I was from there and asked me if I speak English LOL