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Forum
-> Relationships
-> Simcha Section
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amother
Bronze
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 Mon, Jan 01 2024, 5:52 am
| amother OP wrote: | | How far in advance does one invite to a pidyon haben? |
Not more than 30 days 
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amother
Lightyellow
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Mon, Jan 01 2024, 7:23 am
| amother OP wrote: | | How far in advance does one invite to a pidyon haben? |
I invited about a week or two before and then reposted the invite the day before.
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amother
OP
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Mon, Jan 01 2024, 1:25 pm
| amother Lightyellow wrote: | | I invited about a week or two before and then reposted the invite the day before. |
Thanks!
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amother
DarkKhaki
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Mon, Jan 01 2024, 2:44 pm
In our chasdidish circles the boys side makes and pays for the entire affair
Therefore they can invite as many people as they want and they can tell the other side how many invites they can send
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amother
Lemonlime
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Mon, Jan 01 2024, 3:13 pm
| amother DarkKhaki wrote: | In our chasdidish circles the boys side makes and pays for the entire affair
Therefore they can invite as many people as they want and they can tell the other side how many invites they can send |
Please tell me that people aren't so disgusting to not let the new mother invite all her family. She's the one who pushed that baby out!
They're married with a kid now. There should be no more "his side" "her side" against each other
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amother
Quince
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Mon, Jan 01 2024, 3:18 pm
| amother DarkKhaki wrote: | In our chasdidish circles the boys side makes and pays for the entire affair
Therefore they can invite as many people as they want and they can tell the other side how many invites they can send |
True but they aren't as snobby about it as this comes across.
My ils invite just close family like siblings of the couple and aunts/uncles. They don't tell their mechutanim who they could or can't invite, just tell them that they prefer to keep it small and that they only invited XYZ and hope the other side gets the hint. If they don't that's too bad and they just pay for whoever shows up.
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amother
DarkGreen
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Mon, Jan 01 2024, 3:20 pm
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I married a Levi. Also my oldest is a girl. Happy I didn’t have to deal with family politics for a simcha.
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amother
Navyblue
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Mon, Jan 01 2024, 4:30 pm
| amother Molasses wrote: | I can't wrap my head around the concept of making a simcha and inviting only one side of the family. Isn't the child descended equally from both sides of the family? (Even if conceived through AID.)
Make a fake pidyon? Why would anyone do that? To hide the fact that she had a previous baby out of wedlock and gave him up for adoption? Wouldn't it be easier just to say she had a previous miscarriage? Unless the baby was born nine or ten months after the wedding, in which case it would be obvious that a prior miscarriage was impossible. But how would anyone even get an ehrlicher kohen to agree to such a sacrilege? There are brachot levatalah involved. |
I literally can’t understand it either. Not invite both sides to a simcha? So if a parent contributes to your sons bar mitzva do you only invite your side?? 🤔
I made my pidyon haben for my first son 9 years ago. We invited both sides, obviously. We set the hall for 150, and it worked out well.
I WANT everyone to come to my simcha. I don’t get this at all
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coffee icecream
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Mon, Jan 01 2024, 4:36 pm
Yes both sides definitely invited.
I think a week or two is enough time and send a reminder a few days before so everyone remembers
It's a once in a lifetime simcha , unless your limited on space which in that case I would open it to the parents aunts and uncles otherwise even cousins are invited. It's a beautiful simcha to take part in
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amother
Cappuccino
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Mon, Jan 01 2024, 4:55 pm
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My in laws paid for my son’s pinyon haben (normal in our circles. Chassidish). I had all my friends, and family. The only downside to in law’s paying is that they make it where they live and for us it wasn’t in the same city we live. Hard for a new mother to travel but we managed Bh.
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miami85
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Mon, Jan 01 2024, 5:21 pm
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Probably really depends on how big the families are, what size venue/budget for meal, and what time of day the pidyon haben is and if they have work that day. When we had a pidyon haben it was January and it had to be done before shkiya which was about 4:15pm so it cut down the guest list significantly because a lot of people are at work.
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