I want to look amazing but

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amother

DarkOrange

Thu, Feb 29 2024, 3:49 pm

amother OP wrote:

I just don't care??

When I worked out of the house, I got dressed every single day! ?

Well, I should hope so. Very few people can go to the office in their pajamas. A few years back there was a fashion for both men and women to wear what looked like men's PJ bottoms as day wear, usually with flipflops. (At least nobody went out with furry bunny rabbit slippers, be grateful for small mercies.) It was a terrible look.

zaq

Thu, Feb 29 2024, 3:55 pm

amother OP wrote:

I just don't care??

When I was dating, I wore a different makeup look, heels, jewelry and outfit (and we had 11 dates).

Well DUH! If you didn't get farpootzed for a date or a job interview, when would you?

chanatron1000

Thu, Feb 29 2024, 3:56 pm

amother OP wrote:

I see older women like middle aged or older who look fabulous. I want to be 70 and wearing lipstick every day with a gorgeous shaitel! But if I don't care now will I care then??

Maybe. Now you're busy and you have other priorities.

amother

Thu, Feb 29 2024, 4:02 pm

zaq wrote:

Well DUH! If you didn't get farpootzed for a date or a job interview, when would you?

I did!
I had a totally different look each date! I never repeated an outfit OR a pair of shoes!

amother

Thu, Feb 29 2024, 4:04 pm

AlwaysGrateful wrote:

I find this post interesting.

It reads like "I want to look amazing, but right now I have higher priorities than that. Looking amazing takes time and I'd rather spend my time on things that matter than on externals."

Okay. Makes sense.

But then why do you feel like you "should" be different? Or that you want to be different when you're in your 70s? Hopefully in your 70s you will also be using your time for wonderful things. If you have free time to put on makeup and wearing nicer clothes, fine, you'll do that. And if you're busy bonding with your grandchildren, volunteering in the community, helping out a friend...and therefore don't have time to concentrate on gashmius, isn't that even better?

I'm at a similar stage of my life, just a bit farther along. There's never enough time in the day to do everything I want to do. I need to prioritize. I'm sure there are people that need to prioritize makeup and whatnot because it affects their own self-confidence or because of the position that they hold. I'm just glad that's not me. I can focus on all of the other things in life that are more important. I hope that I'll always have things that are more important to me.

I dont know, I guess maybe it's also because these ladies (not a lot - I can count on one hand) are old but have a great social life. They're at every simcha, some of them still work, they're dressed because they're out and about in society.

They're also all rich so...

amother

Pearl

Thu, Feb 29 2024, 4:12 pm

OP, off-topic but sweater dresses sound so cozy! Cn you post a link to yours?

Dolly Welsh

Thu, Feb 29 2024, 4:31 pm

There are several levels between doing nothing and doing everything.

I am sure you spruce up a little for Shabbos. Just because it IS Shabbos.

It is easy to fling on a long necklace that goes over the head, no fiddling with the clasp, and doubling it. There are long (36 inches) glass faceted bead necklaces on Amazon for a few dollars. They sparkle and look like you care. They are light in weight too. Get a few. Just for making kiddish. The kids will see and admire.

Sometimes we need a little blush. Again, just fling it on. You don't even need a mirror. The shade is natural so it doesn't matter exactly where it goes. You aren't contouring.

Then there is the black eye pencil. Throw that on too. No mirror. You know where your eyes are.

No need to glam, but no need for schmattas either. After age 4, mom's authority is diminished by her looking like nothing. Children KNOW.

And you notice, too, yourself.

Stay in the game in tiny little ways.

amother

Thu, Feb 29 2024, 5:11 pm

amother Pearl wrote:

OP, off-topic but sweater dresses sound so cozy! Cn you post a link to yours?

https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d.....ss_tl

Size up for length (I'm 5'3 and get M)

amother

Chartreuse

Thu, Feb 29 2024, 5:48 pm

amother OP wrote:

I just don't care??

When I worked out of the house, I got dressed every single day! Even my nails were done. When I was dating, I wore a different makeup look, heels, jewelry and outfit (and we had 11 dates).

Now I am hitting 30 and have several little kids. I don't work out of the house. I don't have much of a social life. I'm home with a baby, I walk to playgroup pickup, sometimes I walk to the store. Otherwise I'm home or in the park the whole day. I wear the same sweater dress every day (I have multiple lol)

Even now, if I have a lchaim, I don't bother putting on makeup. It's late and I'm tired! And I'm fully confident.

I see older women like middle aged or older who look fabulous. I want to be 70 and wearing lipstick every day with a gorgeous shaitel! But if I don't care now will I care then??

Obviously I don't HAVE to get dressed but, I happen to have great classic style and some beautiful jewelry pieces, I do my makeup professionally... I just can't be bothered (nor does dh care)...

Am I in a season of shleppy dressing?
Will I get dressed when I need to?
Will I ever feel the need or desire to get glammed up (if the second I come home I rip my shaitel and rings and tights off??)

I'd love to hear from other women.

What do you think?

SuperWify

Fri, Mar 01 2024, 4:44 am

I work from home. Last year (and most of my WFH life) I’d throw over a hoodie and skirt over my pjs and take the kids to school in a snood and slippers. I’d wear my pjs most of the day unless I had to go out.

This year, I made a conscience decision to wake up 15/20 minutes earlier and use the time to get fully dressed. Wig, makeup, clothes, tights, shoes (no slippers!). It starts my day off on the right foot.

Also, I bought new clothes and shoes (booties, comfortable but trendy sneakers I can wear everyday) I’d like, and created a very easy skincare and makeup routine, and got a fall wig and some headbands/hats that’s both comfortable and cute.

DrMom

Fri, Mar 01 2024, 5:01 am

I think it's possible to put in a tiny more effort, but it's up to you to decide if it's worth it. And you may decide that it's actually not worth it right now. And that's okay.

You can always try something simple and low-effort, like nice earrings or a different dress (do you really need a bunch of absolutely identical dresses?)

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