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Forum
-> Relationships
-> Guests
florida1
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Thu, Dec 15 2005, 11:44 am
hi
when I invite guest over for shabbos sometimes they ask what they should bring. like dessert or wine as they suggest.
sometimes I would love for them to bring something . a dessert can be very helpful. I feel its impolite to say yea dessert sounds wonderful !
esp this shabbos where I am having a lot of pple and dessert is one less thing to worry about
though im wishing I could
what do you do in situations like these??
and sometimes they really press the issuse . saying are you sure? is there anything I can do ? etc
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willow
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Thu, Dec 15 2005, 11:48 am
I am just like you I hate to have ppl do things for me. Yet my advice would be TAKE THE HELP.
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Meema2Kids
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Thu, Dec 15 2005, 11:51 am
I always say YES.
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ElTam
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Thu, Dec 15 2005, 11:58 am
It depends on who it is. If it is friends we have regularly, I usually say to bring dessert. If we are inviting people we don't know well or don't eat with regularly, I tell them they don't need to bring anything.
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florida1
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Thu, Dec 15 2005, 12:01 pm
well this time its this lady I met we go to a mommy and me together and she is really sweet. but I like what the pp said. this time since its the first time illl say its really okay im all set
.but if she eats over again I wont decline the offer
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RedVines
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Thu, Dec 15 2005, 12:05 pm
Here Everyone brings something plus they send you a thank you note a few days later...my problem is most are completlty not religious/kosher etc. Before it would be uncomfortable, I.e flowers, non-kosher wine...soooo now If I am comfortable I will tell them ahead of time what we do/dont can /cant do...so they will bring a potted plant, kosher wine, or bring over something ahead of time...which is the best.
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technic
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Thu, Dec 15 2005, 4:51 pm
mommyoftwo am I missing sthing here? why is it a problem 2 b gven flowers (and not a pot plant?)
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Motek
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Thu, Dec 15 2005, 5:10 pm
We once had a guest bring us a gorgeous bouquet of flowers, on Shabbos. Um, what should I do with it? Can't put water in the vase ... I just put the flowers in the vase, no water hoped he didn't realize.
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technic
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Thu, Dec 15 2005, 7:23 pm
mommy I just reread ur post and realised u meant ON SHABBAT itself (which is why a pot plant is better!)
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Tefila
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Thu, Dec 15 2005, 8:04 pm
Quote: | We once had a guest bring us a gorgeous bouquet of flowers, on Shabbos. |
Yep thats happend more then once to me too
So knowing guests will bring I just ask them to bring whatever they choose b/4 the shabbos. That has helped! sounds schnoredik but it's inevitable where we r they always do bring something
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realeez
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Thu, Dec 15 2005, 8:12 pm
I always take the help - you are doing them more of a favour by letting them make something. when people refuse help then I have to figure out a time to go buy something - it is so much easier to let me bring a dessert or side dish.
someone once bought me flowers for yom tov and I put it in a vase but forgot to put in water and only realized on yom tov -whoops! they were ok and luckily the bottom half of the vase is frosted so it wasn't too obvious!
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happymom
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Thu, Dec 15 2005, 8:37 pm
Quote: | what do you do in situations like these??
and sometimes they really press the issuse . saying are you sure? is there anything I can do ? etc
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If they say that why not take the opportunity to say " okay well if you really want to help a dessert would be great! Theres nothing wrong with that, especially because they offered...
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imaamy
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Thu, Dec 15 2005, 11:22 pm
I am assuming you all live where there is an eruv? Here it would not always be possible to bring something on Shabbat.
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RedVines
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Thu, Dec 15 2005, 11:47 pm
Not really, here the people arent frum meaning they are driving over...
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