I'm sick to my stomach

amother

Sun, Dec 19 2010, 5:34 am

I bought a skirt on Friday and left it on the bottom of the stairs in a bag. At the same time a young teenage girl who practically lives in my house came over. I went to take a shower and she let her self out. I went to look for the bag this morning and I can't find it anywhere. I know it's a horrible thought to think she took it. But she has been telling me for ages she needs a new denim skirt and cant afford one. I have this horrible feeling she took it. Forget the fact it was a very expensive skirt and I never splurge but she is in my house all the time. How will I trust her again? How will I smile when I see her. I really hope im wrong and it turns up but I turned my house upside down and its nowhere.

bashabelle

Sun, Dec 19 2010, 6:01 am

Was it in a plastic bag? I know its unlikely but maybe it will help you to be DLKS to think that maybe it was thrown out by (a big) mistake. If I were you I would very vaguely ask "By the way... did you happen to see the big blue and white plastic bag (or whatever it looked like) by the stairs yesterday? I've been looking everywhere for it?" Maybe ask whoever is in the room at the time also, not just her so its not like you're singling her out, and then watch her reaction.

Tough situation, hatzlacha.

amother

Sun, Dec 19 2010, 6:13 am

It was in a brown paper bag with handles. Since my kids are really little, they wouldn't have touched it. I'm still waiting for dh to come home so I can ask him but I checked all the places he would have put it. I sent her a text to say "btw I lost a bag, did you accidentily take it with yours?" I did that so she has an opening to give it back. Believe me I dont want it to be her I'm her only "friend' here but it will be really hard to have her in my house again after this. I'll let you know what happens.

pumpkinsbubby

Sun, Dec 19 2010, 6:31 am

I'd have to guess that she either took it by mistake along with her other bags and will return it when she realizes her mistake, or perhaps that one of your family members was trying to help straighten up before Shabbos and stuck it in a closet somewhere. I'm sure it'll turn up. Please let us know the end of the story.

Mimisinger

Sun, Dec 19 2010, 7:34 am

Please be DLKZ - why are you already thinking the worst? You haven't even asked your dh yet???

And btw, Unless you have infants, kids move things. My not even 2 year CONSTANTLY moves, hides and throws things away. It's a good day when I realize so I can go in the garbage after my things that he threw out.

And he's been doing this for at least 6 months - which would be about 18 mths old.

shlomitsmum

Sun, Dec 19 2010, 7:38 am

Mimisinger wrote:

! is the skirt her size?

amother

Sun, Dec 19 2010, 8:39 am

My DH didn't touch it. The kids didn't move it. I have a hard enough time getting them to clean up their own toys. Like I said, I turned my house upside down. If I wasn't DLZ. I wouldn't still be looking but I also need to protect myself. I'm to nice and people take advantage of me. The skirt is very stretchy so its possible it would fit her.

kitov

Sun, Dec 19 2010, 8:42 am

amother wrote:

So say Amar R' Binyomen, give tzedakah l'illu nishams Reb Meir Basl Haness, or tell mama bear's segulah story of Reb Hershele Aliker.

amother

Sun, Dec 19 2010, 10:05 am

Op here -Im really trying. A skirt can easily be replaced trust cannot be. I saw her in the street this am and her hat looked suspiciously like the one I left in my bag. im sorry it just hurts a lot. I wish I could be stronger but after looking my house over and over the evidence does not look good. I dont want it to be her. She is a girl I I have opened my house to. I am her second home. It just hurts.

Mrs. XYZ

Sun, Dec 19 2010, 10:20 am

amother wrote:

her hat??

amother

Sun, Dec 19 2010, 10:26 am

I beg you please to not be quick to judge. This reminds me of so many times when my friends have lost something and automatically blame it on the cleaning lady. So this once happened to me: I searched my entire house for my wedding ring and couldn't find it anywhere. The only one who frequented my house was the cleaning lady who comes once a week, so in my mind I could not help but accuse her.
So the next time she came, I asked her if she had perhaps seen my wedding band and described it to her. She said she had not seen it anywhere, and my mind kept telling me that she probably sold it already! It must have been months afterwards when I found the ring, and till this day I cannot forgive myself for accusing the cleaning lady in my mind. It was a rather cold night and I took my wool winter jacket out of the closet to wear to a simcha. Lo and behold, in the pocket was my wedding band! And then it hit me! The last time I wore the jacket I had arrived late at a simcha so I decided to go and wash before hanging up my jacket and slipped the ring into the pocket!

amother

Sun, Dec 19 2010, 10:38 am

yes her hat. In the bag with my skirt was a hat and a new pair of earmuffs. For the last two weeks she's been wearing a gray hat. All of the sudden she's wearing a beret just like the one I left in my bag. This is not a litlle ring (BTW I missing my wedding band too-but thats another story) this bag I bought Friday left it on the bottom of my steps. She was watching tv. I went to take a shower and she let herself out. Probably about ten times in the last month she is telling me how much she wants a pencil denim skirt and mine disappears. There are just so many places it could have gone and I checked repeartedly. Im sorry I m doing the best I can. If it turns up in the house I will ask jer Mechilla but I cant be naive either.

marina

Sun, Dec 19 2010, 10:41 am

so is this girl stupid? Do you think she is so dumb as to take and wear something that you will clearly identify as stolen from your home? How do you think her mind works about this?