Confidentiality and privacy

amother

Thu, Jul 12 2012, 7:50 pm

Hi,
I was wondering for those of you with kids seeing a psychologist, does the psychologist ever tell you what your child talked about? I'm not talking about teenagers.

5 yo ds has been seeing a psychologist for play therapy for the past 3 months and I've been DYING to know what goes on in there. There is so much going through this kid's head and I would LOVE to hear his thoughts. But he's a guy, and he's not the most expressive...

So imagine my surprise and excitement when the therapist invited me into the office for a session with the both of us. I was so stoked to hear what goes through DS's mind, and why he does the things he does.
Well ds refused to talk. It was an incredible waste of a session. The therapist kept asking him if he wanted to share what they had been talking about and he's like "not really"

He just DID NOT want to talk about it. We tried talking to each other and not including him in the conversation to make DS feel less pressured and kept coming back to him, and he kept shutting me out. In a very calm (which is uncharacteristic for him) but decisive way. "I don't really want to tell you" "Sorry, I'd rather talk about something else" etc.

I just thought it was interesting. You would think that Dr-Patient confidentiality should not apply to children, especially little ones. I mean, I am his legal guardian I am not? Shouldn't I know about what he's going through? And yet... The fact that he does not want to share what happens in therapy with me...

I just wanted to hear your thoughts...

amother

Thu, Jul 12 2012, 9:12 pm

When my children went for therapy, I was informed about what was happening. I participated in about the first ten minutes to update. I would absolutely insist on knowing. If your child does not want to talk when you are around find out from the therapist why. I would also find out from my child why. The why my child does not have good communication with me would concern me more than what is being said.

amother

Thu, Jul 12 2012, 9:36 pm

OP here,

Obviously I get updates at the end of each session where the therapist tells me what they're working on and what I can do at home. But he won't give me specifics on WHAT they talked about, like what specifically is bothering him, what he CHOSE to discuss and why, etc. You know, little things that give you insight into how they think.

But now, knowing he doesn't want me to know, I don't know if I feel comfortable with him telling me about their sessions, as much as I would love to be a fly on the wall.

I don't know. This whole thing is new to me.

amother

Fri, Jul 13 2012, 3:13 am

Sounds normal. The therapist is sharing the general process, but not the details. That's just professional. General info should be expected to be shared. Our child is a legal adult, but because we're paying, we get general info.

It could sabatoge the whole process if the therapist runs to tell you every little thing your child discusses. It's normal to invite the parents in for a conversation, but the child can't be forced to talk. He has to feel that he has choices.