Hug it out! | Imamother

Jewishfoodie

Tue, Feb 20 2018, 2:17 pm

simba wrote:

it is taking you an awfully long time to pack your bags and leave. Need assistance?
I am not sure if I am even allowed to help a [non jew]. I know that you are not allowed to give Matnas Chinam to a [non jew]. I guess in this case it would be for my personal pleasure as well so I can likely help you to the door.
Can I offer to braid your parakeets hair, if she already has hair she needs to make sure it looks nice for DH, you know what I mean Smile

Are you now saying my husband gets turned on by parakeets?!?

When will this madness end!

I'm packing! There are a lot of ingredients in halapoochas and I can't very well THROW them into my luggage, now, can I!

And, you wouldn't help a Gerrer chassid make a hole in her sheet, I'm not expecting your help!

Good bye!

enneamom

Tue, Feb 20 2018, 2:30 pm

You know what simba, you're right. I've seen the error of my ways. Here's the poem I ordered from Amazon Prime (they had a sale)

We wrapped this in a towel
(We're not sure where it's been)
The candy is organic
The holes are very thin
So don't worry 'bout hechsherim
'Cuz it's holey as can be
And if you get upset, please don't
Throw potatoes at me.
Let's all just eat some kugel
And have a peaceful time
While kids run around with candy guns
Cuz gun control's a crime
And maybe while you're at it
Can you tell me, please, what shape
This pastry's so confusing
Even with the extra tape
A lawyer and a therapist
Walked into a candy bar
They charged a thousand dollars
Then used food stamps for a car
If you're leaving imamother
Take this with you in your pekel
You shouldn't starve, but go already!
(In your husband's rekel)
Cuz if we all have achdus
We won't have to be in galus
Even blondes can all agree
That I'm not just gushing shtus!

simba

Tue, Feb 20 2018, 2:49 pm

enneamom, your poem is growing in me. I just need to get over the fact that it was ordered on Amazon. it somehow does not sit right with me. I cant imagine people that do "it" with a hole in the sheet shop on amazon.
I guess I have to be more open minded.
when you shop for costumes on amazon do you see the boys faces? Can tell you are female and assure you a tznius shopping experience? Do you wear your snood while shopping on Amazon?

keym

Tue, Feb 20 2018, 2:50 pm

enneamom wrote:

You know what simba, you're right. I've seen the error of my ways. Here's the poem I ordered from Amazon Prime .

We wrapped this in a towel
(We're not sure where it's been)
The candy is organic
The holes are very thin
So don't worry 'bout hechsherim
'Cuz it's holey as can be
And if you get upset, please don't
Throw potatoes at me.
Let's all just eat some kugel
And have a peaceful time
While kids run around with candy guns
Cuz gun control's a crime
And maybe while you're at it
Can you tell me, please, what shape
This pastry's so confusing
Even with the extra tape
A lawyer and a therapist
Walked into a candy bar
They charged a thousand dollars
Then used food stamps for a car
If you're leaving imamother
Take this with you in your pekel
You shouldn't starve, but go already!
(In your husband's rekel)
Cuz if we all have achdus
We won't have to be in galus
Even blondes can all agree
That I'm not just gushing shtus!

Wow! Just wow!
You just forgot one thing.
At the beginning.
Dear Keym,

simba

Tue, Feb 20 2018, 2:51 pm

Jewishfoodie wrote:

I am not saying anything about your DH, you are a G0yta. Their is no kiddushin, you do not have a husband. My goodness, you should have a talk with your parakeet about jewish laws and customs.

And regarding your galuptzes, you can leave them here for the Am HaNivchar.

enneamom

Tue, Feb 20 2018, 2:52 pm

simba wrote:

I ONLY shop through my Akum. How dare you make such insinuations. I even blur her face before she shops. She is very frum, in her own Akum way. She wears a burka.

simba

Tue, Feb 20 2018, 2:53 pm

keym wrote:

Wow! Just wow!
You just forgot one thing.
At the beginning.
Dear Keym,

I was going to order one for myself but my mind is wondering where that towel might have been. Not sure what she means by that so ill stay safe.

gold21

Tue, Feb 20 2018, 2:57 pm

I honestly don't know why you all are on the internet. It's very untznius to be posting about your personal lives in this manner.

Personally, I am very careful with tznius. I wear a double layer of bright lipstick on my lips to keep them hidden from view. I also wear dark polish to keep my nails hidden. I know it's a little extreme but I try to be the frummest I can be. You have to be so careful these days.

So maybe I look like the Rebbetzin of Meah Shearim with my red lips and black nails. But I feel proud that I am covering up what needs to be covered.

Last edited by gold21 on Tue, Feb 20 2018, 3:01 pm; edited 2 times in total

simba

Tue, Feb 20 2018, 3:00 pm

gold21 wrote:

Jewish (she is not really) Foodie is packing her bags and will be leaving soon, maybe you can catch a ride with her. Unless she is going with her significant other and wants to spend time in the car with him.

Jewishfoodie

Tue, Feb 20 2018, 3:01 pm

simba wrote:

Lol!

You are funny!

(ETA; you might have won this round...)

keym

Tue, Feb 20 2018, 3:03 pm

enneamom wrote:

Why, are you blonde?

Besides I already left you a bag with all my foodstamps and all my money.
It was very easy to know where you live. I was at the mall getting coffee and there was a store that had a whole bunch of pictures of you. I recognized you and Rabbi Hedwig immediately. Though some pictures had you with a boy and girl. Thats really pritzus.
But I realized thats where enneamom lives. At Barnes and Nobles.
Right?
Now do I get shalach manos with a poem?

enneamom

Tue, Feb 20 2018, 3:05 pm

keym wrote:

You can have a tray of my best broomstick-shaped homemade "hamentashen!"

Jewishfoodie

Tue, Feb 20 2018, 3:18 pm

simba wrote:

Apropros of nothing, what's the best Louis Vuitton bag to pack dirty towels and Tarfus in?

simba

Tue, Feb 20 2018, 3:29 pm

Jewishfoodie wrote:

Apropro of nothing, what's the best Louis Vuitton bag to pack dirty towels and Tarfus in?

thats a tough question. I keep my luggage in a climate controlled storage unit. it comes out when I travel to the shvigger on our annual aliya l'regel.
if you have the classic trunk (I got it as a ore-school graduation gift) I would suggest it.

Jewishfoodie

Tue, Feb 20 2018, 3:34 pm

simba wrote:

My bird wants to know if it was made from a b'heimah n'kia. Whatever that is. I guess he means, was it checked for shatnes? Who cares...

rainbow

Tue, Feb 20 2018, 3:38 pm

gold21 wrote:

Personally, I am very careful with tznius. I wear a double layer of bright lipstick on my lips to keep them hidden from view. I also wear dark polish to keep my nails hidden. I know it's a little extreme but I try to be the frummest I can be. You have to be so careful these days

I know. I was at Aldi's the other day and they had a stash of black nail polish. I bought like 50 bottles in all. Was thinking that'd be enough for covering my legs too. Too bad they didn't have them in grey. Can you imagine 50 bottles of grey - that would be enough for me and my two dil's.

gold21

Tue, Feb 20 2018, 3:47 pm

rainbow wrote:

Gray actually sounds amazing. Love me some gray polish! But I'm not sure if it would be opaque enough? They should really label the polish like they do with pantyhose so we know how opaque it is before we buy it. Ya know?

Boca00

Tue, Feb 20 2018, 3:51 pm

rainbow wrote:

I'm not sure what a difference it will make since we're wearing burqas anyway.