Home

Wwyd? Force kids to share snacks from school with siblings?
Previous  1, 2
 
Post new topic   Reply to topic    Forum -> Parenting our children


View latest: 24h 48h 72h


tichellady




 
 
 
 

Post  Thu, Nov 12 2020, 11:07 am
Stars wrote:
Really? Every time you eat something you offer some to everyone around you?


Not random strangers, but yes, if I’m having something special and fun I wouldn’t eat it in front of my kids or guests unless I’m planning on sharing it.
Back to top

amother




Chartreuse
 

Post  Thu, Nov 12 2020, 11:10 am
I remember hearing a saying "If you show it, you share it."

I thought it had merits (namely avoiding the taunting and showing off), but I never really implemented it because I think sometimes showing your stuff is a joy and I think its also important to allow the kid who got the prize to be queen for a moment. Eventually, as kids get older and have diff tastes, it becomes a non-issue and they can show their stuff without someone being really jealous. Also sometimes the kid who sees it asks nicely, and the other shares. And sometimes they get a "no" and they learn to say "oh well, its okay." And sometimes because I'm the mother and I say so, I'm allowed to say its really hard to want something someone else got, would you like to choose a treat as well. Sometimes you're allowed to be nice to make your kid feel good. Not everything has to be a lesson that gets banged over the head.
Back to top

ddmom




 
 
 
 

Post  Thu, Nov 12 2020, 12:56 pm
Read the kid's book " Manny in a pickle"!
Very cute story about a man that never learned because everytime he had a tantrum his mother said yes!!!
Back to top

FranticFrummie




 
 
 
 

Post  Thu, Nov 12 2020, 1:42 pm
abound wrote:
They are each individuals and trying to get them to always have to give some of their own things to others is not healthy. If your other child saids that A did not give him/her a wafer just say, A got it in school and it is his to do with as he pleases. Dont force them to share.


I agree with this.

Still, you need to teach your kids not to taunt and tease each other, and make each other cry on purpose. If you're not going to share your snack, be quiet and don't wave it around.
Back to top

Live+Love




 
 
 
 

Post  Thu, Nov 12 2020, 8:55 pm
Honestly I did not yet look through this thread, not even the Op. just the title itself triggered me.
So I came to say this: You cannot FORCE upon moral deads if you want your kids to perform
Back to top

amother




Powderblue
 

Post  Thu, Nov 12 2020, 9:24 pm
I disagree with most of these posts. In our house, I teach the kids that if we have the ability to give, we give, especially to family. I practice it, and in turn my kids practice it. My kids regularly save treats for the siblings and offer to share without prompting. In fact, they are excited to share. If it's a prize, then turns are taken. I don't encourage this out of equity but rather to promote the thought process of being a giver. I would not force a child to share, that's not sharing.
Back to top

Twinster




 
 
 
 

Post  Thu, Nov 12 2020, 11:04 pm
amother [ Powderblue ] wrote:
I disagree with most of these posts. In our house, I teach the kids that if we have the ability to give, we give, especially to family. I practice it, and in turn my kids practice it. My kids regularly save treats for the siblings and offer to share without prompting. In fact, they are excited to share. If it's a prize, then turns are taken. I don't encourage this out of equity but rather to promote the thought process of being a giver. I would not force a child to share, that's not sharing.


I don’t see how you’re disagreeing with most. We all believe in giving and sharing (at least, I think so).
And in your last line you echo what most are saying - you cannot force it, or it isn’t called sharing.
Back to top

amother




Sapphire
 

Post  Fri, Nov 13 2020, 12:13 am
I have this with 3.5y and 15m, I pick them up one after the other and the older one always has a snack and the baby obviously can't even talk yet. I still don't make them share.
Back to top

amother




Cyan
 

Post  Fri, Nov 13 2020, 12:28 am
Mine are very young and while I don't force sharing I definitely compensate the child who doesn't get shared with. Sometimes it's not even the others fault but it's a snack that's not really shareable or it's eaten in the car where they can't reach each other. I'm very happy to give the other a treat or snack as well at home because while life is unfair and unequal as a mother when I have the ability to make a child feel good in such a simple way why wouldn't I? Life is unfair but I hope to be a safe and comforting place for them always. So ok let them all have a pretzel or lollypop after school, no harm done.
Back to top

pause




 
 
 
 

Post  Fri, Nov 13 2020, 1:18 pm
Just an interesting occurrence today:

DC4 came home from school and said, "Today I brought home my Shabbos party so that I can share with [DC same-gender-sibling-closest-in-age]."

And I said, "Wow, that is such nice thing to do, to want to share..."

Smile
Back to top
Previous  1, 2 Recent Topics

Page 2 of 2 View latest: 24h 48h 72h


Post new topic   Reply to topic    Forum -> Parenting our children

Related Topics Replies Last Post
YOB Boys Division school
by amother
5 Yesterday at 10:59 pm View last post
Therapeutic boarding school?
by amother
0 Yesterday at 7:02 am View last post
Need help with videos for different age kids
by amother
3 Mon, Jan 18 2021, 9:17 pm View last post
Looking for Montessori Boys School Age 5 Brooklyn
by amother
2 Mon, Jan 18 2021, 10:55 am View last post
Which watch for High School DD?
by susanp
3 Mon, Jan 18 2021, 8:22 am View last post