Hasidic actor walks off Portman movie

Tehilla

Sun, Mar 16 2008, 9:41 pm

I don't think it is a kiddush Hashem in the least bit.

I don't think commenting how good looking someone else's husband is, is appropriate either, and if anything illustrates how inappropriate this whole thing is.

and yes, there is something very powerful about all the "pretending" that goes on in Hollywood. how people "fall in love" when working on a set together in a movie, and leave their current boyfriend/girlfriend/spouse for their movie partner...only to find that strangely (this is sarcastic) their feelings fade when the movie is done, or the next one comes along.

this is sad.

Clarissa

Sun, Mar 16 2008, 9:50 pm

Tehilla wrote:

I don't think commenting how good looking someone else's husband is, is appropriate either, and if anything illustrates how inappropriate this whole thing is.

I disagree. I think it illustrates who how are all human, and can appreciate physical beauty.

Tehilla wrote:

and yes, there is something very powerful about all the "pretending" that goes on in Hollywood. how people "fall in love" when working on a set together in a movie, and leave their current boyfriend/girlfriend/spouse for their movie partner...only to find that strangely (this is sarcastic) their feelings fade when the movie is done, or the next one comes along.

this is sad.

Of course it's terrible when a marriage ends, but that happens outside of Hollywood, as well. I don't know if it has as much to do with the film sets themselves as with the types of people who go into acting and their need for adulation and affirmation. They have egos that need massaging, and for some people, that means that they have little self-control in many situations. If the same people were in business or politics or sales, I suspect there would be similar outcomes. And as far as feeling sad for them, let's be honest. If the comments there (most of which I haven't read, because they were so moronic) have taught us anything, it is that we all pity those who live lives we don't understand. Much of the population doesn't understand the lives of the women here, with the shidduchim, marriages to near-strangers, large number of children, and constant religious obligations. Yet you find it wonderful and fulfilling, just as they find their lives exciting or creatively fulfilling or meaningful.

note: This post does not condone infidelity.

Tehilla

Sun, Mar 16 2008, 9:54 pm

Quote:

Yet you find it wonderful and fulfilling, just as they find their lives exciting or creatively fulfilling or meaningful.

if you are speaking of the vast majority of people in Hollywood, that's not true. most of them are in pursuit of fulfillment and happiness, and trying to get that from emptiness.

before I was observant, I was involved with the film industry up close and personal in both NY and LA. I knew and/or met quite a few famous people. even they admitted in private, that it's always after the "next big thing" to try and fill the void.

Mama Bear

Sun, Mar 16 2008, 9:57 pm

first of all, the comments in the article was exaggerated. NO ONe wanted to "KILL HIM" - everhyone was basically amused/shocked by the whole thing. He fled willy cuz he wasnt int he mood to face the barrage of publicity that davening in shul on shabbos would bring him.

Secondly, the ENTIRE THING WAS A FIVE MINUTE MOVIE, hardly a speaking part, he wouldnt 'fall in love' with natalie portman from working with her for one day. Full length love story movies involve physical contact, and real emotional acting - this was just a quick, five minute film. I dont think any harm woujld come to his marriage from this.

Tehilla

Sun, Mar 16 2008, 10:00 pm

I'm sure you're right Mama Bear.

you should know though, that a five minute scene that is aired, takes much longer to complete when filming as they often do a scene over again multiple times.

the point is, to consider a five minute scene to "be ok," so what's after that?

it's a dangerous line to walk.

Clarissa

Sun, Mar 16 2008, 10:01 pm

Tehilla wrote:

I, too, have been involved in film, although not knowing the specifics, I can't compare our experiences nor our contact with people who are involved. I've known (and known of, through friends) and met many creative and interesting people who seem to have very fulfilling lives and committed relationships. Are there lost souls there? Sure, but there are lost souls on Wall Street, in the world of medicine, in the literary world, and even in academia. Yet in all these worlds there are also stable, happy people. I still feel that the reason that so many marriages disintegrate in the film business are the egos that are involved when people are attracted to such a business, and the insecurities.

For some reason, this reminds me of a time when I was staying at a hotel in Kansas City. There was a medical convention in town, and all I saw were older men with really young women -- girlfriends, young trophy wives, whatever. Every business has it's peculiar draw for certain types of people, with their strengths or frailties.

Clarissa

Sun, Mar 16 2008, 10:14 pm

sleepless-n-ny wrote:

well usually falling in love in movie usually happens in intimate scenes or spending a lot of time together.

Not necessarily true. Sometimes actors fall in love with crew members, production people or actors who were not playing the love interest. I can think of several examples of this.

yikes!

Sun, Mar 16 2008, 10:21 pm

Clarissa wrote:

sleepless-n-ny wrote:

well usually falling in love in movie usually happens in intimate scenes or spending a lot of time together.

Not necessarily true. Sometimes actors fall in love with crew members, production people or actors who were not playing the love interest. I can think of several examples of this.

yup, here's one: Julia Roberts and cameraman Danny Moder. Moder was married at the time.

Clarissa

Sun, Mar 16 2008, 10:22 pm

Tehilla wrote:

Quote:

For some reason, this reminds me of a time

Quote:

what reminds you...the conversation or thread? something else?

I assume you're referring to my story about the dirty old cardiologists living it up on the road. The reason I thought of it is that one can just as easily speak of all of the doctors who, because of all of it going to their head and the ego involved, feel they can dump the women who put them through medical school and hook up with young women. I know, that's a cliche, but there's some truth in it. Plenty of professions have ego involved or a lifestyle not very conducive to marital stability, because of the workload or travel or the personalities usually involved. I think it's very simplistic to tie behavior of certain people on movie sets with what might or might not happen if a Satmar guy spends some time filming with a beautiful actress. By the way, this fantasy scenario also involves Portman wanting to make a life with this man, and the man really wanting to completely leave his life behind -- religious affiliation, wife and children, etc. So it's far-fetched to talk about how dangerous it is for Cabinet Guy to be on set. Far more worth examining is whether it's appropriate for a man from a culture where movie-watching is eschewed to actually appear in one. We'd sound more intelligent if we discussed that than whether he was going to run off and create a passel of Hollywood cabinet-selling-and-acting babies with a starlet.

ChossidMom

Mon, Mar 17 2008, 12:40 am

Mama Bear wrote:

Okay. I got some more info.

Karpen DEFINITELy knew Natalie before this. He met her somewhere... be it the mitzvah tank, or who knows where else. natalie recommended him for the part. That's strange and unusual for a Satmar guy too. What I'm learningn about this guy as we go along, is that he enjoys life and enjoys pushing the envelope without breaking any real rules or doing aveiras. He learns a mean blatt gemara, so it's not like he's going to fling his shtrimel into the Hudson anytime soon and run away to join the circus. But- he did know what he was getting into, and didnt stop to consider the consequences before.

I'm just a little surprised at the naievete of this statement. How do YOU know if he is going to fling his streimel in the Hudson anytime soon? Since when does knowing how to learn determine if a person stays frum? I think it's nice that you're standing up for him but really. To claim to know what's going on in his head is pushing it.

Rolling Eyes

wif

Mon, Mar 17 2008, 3:39 am

ChossidMom wrote:

Mama Bear wrote:

He won't. Cuz streimels are reeaaaallly expensive.

Shaz

Mon, Mar 17 2008, 5:30 am

Clarissa wrote:

Shaz wrote:

I think the issue is not whether he should or shouldn't have been in the movie. My question is why did he talk to the reporters afterwards? Why did he say that he was threatened, etc. I think that it might have just blown over if he'd backed out without giving a reason, instead of going into details about community pressure, etc. JMHO.

See, this really bothers me. The big problem is that somebody told about what goes on? This reminds me of the situation where the woman didn't dress "properly" and was threatened, but the big crime would have been for her to speak to the outside world. Maybe if it's understood that we are part of the planet, we'll behave accordingly. If we have nothing to be ashamed of in terms of how we live, then it doesn't matter who learns anything about us. If he was pressured and/or threatened, he can say so. If he wasn't and he said so, he's a liar.

Clarissa - I didn't say that I agreed with the community pressure. I just don't think that it is right to run to the non-Jewish newspapers about it. Why do we need our issues brought up for the whole non-Jewish world to judge. If he wants to go to a Jewish newspaper and bring it up as a community thing, fine. I just don't see how this is productive other than the non jews thinking we are wierd/closed-minded, etc. I don't think it has to do with being embarrassed in front of the outside world, I just think that newspapers in general discuss things that are otherwise pure Lashon Harah, why should we add to it and dafka create a chillul Hashem?

greenfire

Mon, Mar 17 2008, 11:23 am

hey - I see you all got something to talk about ...
this should have been left alone - there would have been less havoc and rolling eyes ...

new york new york - a hard place not to notice the jews and make them part of the entertainment world ... come on - admit people like them being part of the world at large ... noticeable for some years now on many a tv show ... this is not much different except a man's family taking consequences out in the open public ...