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Forum
-> Household Management
-> Finances
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amother
OP
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 Thu, Mar 14 2024, 11:44 am
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Based on where we are right now financially, there is no way (b'derech hatevah) that we can afford Pesach food. That doesn't mean we won't buy food but it does mean that we will put it on the credit card with no plan of how we can pay it back which we have BH never done before. We manage day-to-day by living very frugally. New clothing for Pesach won't happen for anyone in my family but we will be ok without it. We do, however, need to buy food, matzah, wine, etc. which all cost so much. Is it right to get food for Pesach from Tomchei Shabbos or do I put it on my credit card and daven that Hashem send us a way to pay it off?
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amother
Navy
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Thu, Mar 14 2024, 11:46 am
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If you have no way to pay it back and you are living frugally I don't see why you shouldn't accept help, especially for pesach food which is a huge expense.
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amother
Green
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Thu, Mar 14 2024, 11:50 am
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I think you should accept help. I accepted when I was in that situation.
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amother
Saddlebrown
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Thu, Mar 14 2024, 11:50 am
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Get help for food. Especially since you aren’t buying clothing or any extras and still don’t have a way to buy food you should take the help with the food being given out.
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amother
Peachpuff
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Thu, Mar 14 2024, 11:59 am
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You don’t have to be at a breaking point to take.
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newinbp
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Thu, Mar 14 2024, 12:13 pm
If u need help, accept it. Ur not doing anyone any favors by over exhausting an already difficult situation.
May Hashem shower u w shefa!
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happyone
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Thu, Mar 14 2024, 12:23 pm
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Pesach is a time when chesed is outpouring. Tap into it. When you have the means you'll reverse the role iyh. May you be at the giving side soon.
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amother
Junglegreen
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Thu, Mar 14 2024, 12:23 pm
Sounds like you’re part of the target demographic for these programs.
Useful tip - if you need to spend on things for pesach that programs don’t offer help with, get a 0% interest on purchases card. It’ll last for 12-18 months depending on the card you get which gives you time to pay it off, or to do a balance transfer to another 0% interest card.
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amother
OP
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Thu, Mar 14 2024, 12:27 pm
Thanks everyone! I guess my question is more of a hashkafic one. My husband and I both work full time. We are doing our hishtadlus and we have bitachon that, with the hishtalus we are doing, Hashem will provide for us. There were so many times in the past when we didn't know how we would pay for things but it always worked out, Boruch Hashem. With that being said, we do not spend in excess and try as much as possible to live within our means.
We recently had some unexpected medical expenses along with expensive car repairs that have significantly impacted our budget. Right now we do not have a way to cover our Pesach expenses. Do we continue to do as we did in the past and daven that Hashem provide for our needs? Do we say that taking food from Tomchei Shabbos is Hashem's way of providing?
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amother
Mulberry
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Thu, Mar 14 2024, 12:40 pm
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justforfun87
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Thu, Mar 14 2024, 12:48 pm
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I think the fact that you are both open to reaching out for help is a great sign that you should accept it. Many times husbands refuse causing a lot of strife. You shouldn't be in debt due to food. Now if you said you HAD to go to a hotel I would probably feel differently. If I was donating to this organization I would hope it would go to a family exactly like yours.
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newinbp
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Thu, Mar 14 2024, 1:30 pm
Why in the world not? Every yiddishe family needs to make pesach and deserves to have a mentchlich experience. These organizations exist to help people going thru tough times which it sounds like OP is. Nothing to be embarrassed about, it’s geiva to think one will never have a hardship and will never be in such a position. We all have ups and downs and doven to always be on the up, Hashem is in charge.
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amother
Dimgray
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Thu, Mar 14 2024, 4:20 pm
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Why don't you ask your Rav?
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amother
Lotus
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Thu, Mar 14 2024, 4:35 pm
| amother OP wrote: | Thanks everyone! I guess my question is more of a hashkafic one. My husband and I both work full time. We are doing our hishtadlus and we have bitachon that, with the hishtalus we are doing, Hashem will provide for us. There were so many times in the past when we didn't know how we would pay for things but it always worked out, Boruch Hashem. With that being said, we do not spend in excess and try as much as possible to live within our means.
We recently had some unexpected medical expenses along with expensive car repairs that have significantly impacted our budget. Right now we do not have a way to cover our Pesach expenses. Do we continue to do as we did in the past and daven that Hashem provide for our needs? Do we say that taking food from Tomchei Shabbos is Hashem's way of providing? |
Yes 💯 take the help from the resources you need now
You’ll beH get by onyour own soon now take the help that’s available to you. Especially in a circumstances beyond your control
IyH you’ll be able to enjoy yomtov like a mecntch many more families need tomechei shabbos over Pesach
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giftedmom
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Thu, Mar 14 2024, 4:44 pm
Hashem has his shlichim in the form of those with the means to give.
You know the story with the man on the boat?
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amother
Thistle
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Thu, Mar 14 2024, 4:49 pm
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Don't get into debt it will just get bigger and bigger and hard to get out of. Tomchei shabbos is for people like you they also get very good deals on food and it costs them much less
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amother
Sand
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Thu, Mar 14 2024, 5:37 pm
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Going into debt is a huge rabbit hole. How would you feel if you told yourself that you will take the money and if Hashem sends you extra money to cover it in the end you will gladly donate the money back to the organization?
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amother
Amaranthus
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Thu, Mar 14 2024, 5:47 pm
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Having been in a similar situation in the past, I say TAKE without hesitation.
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amother
Alyssum
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Thu, Mar 14 2024, 5:49 pm
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If I was a wealthy donor, I would be happier for you to take $1,000 TS now than to start accumulating credit card debt, which I will cost you thousands and thousands to pay off.
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amother
Alyssum
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Thu, Mar 14 2024, 5:52 pm
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I was the type of person who would never in a thousand years think I would need to take help to feed my family. But God has a sense of humor and the time came when that's what I had to do so my kids would have food to eat. It was very painful. I won't deny that. But just like sometimes it's your hishtadlus to work, sometimes if your hishtadlus to apply for a tzedakah program. (If that's really your question, ask your Rabbi. But my guess it's the emotional pain of taking. And I get that. I really do.)
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