Dealing with teenage depression

amother

Fri, Dec 17 2010, 12:33 am

Ok so basically, there has been an enormous amount of stress in our house lately and my 15 year old dd fell into a depression. She constantly talks about suicide and how life would be better if she wouldn't be here. She feels like a burden on everyone (even one dh and I) and I am at my wits end. I called a psychiatrist because my other dd has bipolar so was wondering if connected here. He said its normal for the amount of stress she's under. I wanted ideas of what to tell her when she's in her down moods, what I should tell her to do, and how to get through this all myself. TIA

qtpie

Fri, Dec 17 2010, 12:43 am

I am so sorry for what you are going through. Based on your post, it does not sound like a normal thing for anyone to say under any amount of stress: to express plans or desires for suicide. Please take her in for an assessment. She may indeed be diagnosed with Bipolar or Depression in which case meds (and of course counseling) could help significantly. And if not a diagnosis, perhaps counseling would ease her burden.

Would counseling be helpful for you also? Take time off twice a week to do something for yourself?

I hope this gets resolved soon.

amother

Fri, Dec 17 2010, 1:15 am

K I forgot to mention that we took her in to a psychiatrist who said its a depression that can be treated by therapy, without medication so she is going to a therapist regularly but the days that she doesn't go she can get very bad. But she does have good days which is when she is super-happy and bad days when she's super-depressed. I'm so fed up! She also has no self confidence which I think makes everything worse.
I am going to a therapist for myself but seriously, I just wish this was all a nightmare because having dd like this makes the stress even worse on everyone else.

Fox

Fri, Dec 17 2010, 1:42 am

I hate to sound like someone who throws pills at every problem . . . but I think a pharmaceutical intervention may be required here. Your DD is experiencing "depressive episodes" in which she spirals down into severe depression. While therapy may eventually help her recognize these spirals and either avoid them or at least learn how to cope with them, she is not at that point yet.

Perhaps press her current psychiatrist for his/her reasons for not prescribing an antidepressant. Obviously, there may be some good reason that we don't know. If, however, the psychiatrist was simply trying to avoid giving drugs or just wanted to give therapy a chance first, then it's time to suggest a more proactive treatment. There are plenty of antidepressants that are safe and effective for teenagers, and your DD doesn't necessarily have to take the medication long-term.

Depression in teenagers is especially serious because of what neuroscientists call "kindling." Experiencing repeated depressive episodes as a teenager actually rewires the way the brain works. Every episode that can be avoided will make it easier to avoid problems with depression in the future.

Hatzlacha, and feel free to PM me!

amother

Fri, Dec 17 2010, 2:03 am

the psychiatrist specifically said its not a clinical depression which would require medication. I must say that this has not been given THAT much of a chance. It started about a month ago and until we got her into her regular therapist appointments it took time. A few days ago one of the major stresses at home were relieved and the psychiatrist said to see how she does now that she'll have a chance to recuperate hopefully. The problem is that I don't know what to say to her when she's upset because I realize that whatever I say gets her upset but somehow what some of her friends say, calm her down. Any advice?