8 y/o not toilet trained

amother

DarkYellow

Sun, Apr 30 2023, 6:43 pm

amother Ballota wrote:

Unfortunately none of these are easily ruled in or out , nor easily remedied.
There are ways to look out for clues though. And see what resonates most.
Is she a mouth breather?
Does she have other developmental or behavioral issues?
Any indications she might have food intolerances?
Fine or gross motor skills indicating weak core or weak pelvic floor?

Why would mouth breathing, or undeveloped jaw, be related?

amother

Ballota

Sun, Apr 30 2023, 6:47 pm

amother DarkYellow wrote:

Why would mouth breathing, or undeveloped jaw, be related?

Lack of sufficient oxygen can cause underdeveloped frontal lobe, stress on trigeminal nerves will cause autonomic dysfunction. Restricted tongue movement can also be a cause of weak core and pelvic floor. In very short. Nasal breathing, proper bite and proper resting position for the tongue is extremely important for nervous system development.

amother

DarkYellow

Sun, Apr 30 2023, 6:50 pm

amother Ballota wrote:

I've been a mouth breather my entire life, I never heard this.

amother

Powderblue

Sun, Apr 30 2023, 6:53 pm

How are you dealing with this now? Pull ups? Or underwear?

For my three year old, I went back to diapers for a bit and then trained. It removed a lot of stress. She's 8, but maybe take the pressure off of her for a few months and then try again? (Obviously not diapers, but don't pressure her not to use the pull-ups. Take a stress break.)

amother

Ballota

Sun, Apr 30 2023, 6:54 pm

amother DarkYellow wrote:

I've been a mouth breather my entire life, I never heard this.

Doesn’t have to cause these issues, but it can. It often causes other issues that people don’t necessarily connect to mouth breathing. If you want to learn more you can read the book Breathe by James Nestor.

amother

DarkYellow

Sun, Apr 30 2023, 6:57 pm

amother Ballota wrote:

Thanks

amother

PlumPink

Sun, Apr 30 2023, 6:59 pm

I really feel your pain and despair. This was us with our 6 year old. Always running to different therapists and different kinds of therapies. Needing to give everything a good 6 month try to see if that was the golden ticket. Documenting times and measuring amounts. Its exhausting and draining. Sending lots of hugs.

amother

Wed, May 03 2023, 9:10 am

Thank you all for the kind words and helpful ideas. I made her an appointment with a pelvic floor PT and for a neuropsych evaluation. Let's hope some progress comes from this because it is costing a pretty penny

amother

Ghostwhite

Wed, May 03 2023, 9:28 am

amother OP wrote:

If you are in NY can you please share whom you’re seeing for the neuropsych? Ty

amother

Mint

Wed, May 03 2023, 9:33 am

amother OP wrote:

Good luck! and yes it is costly Sad

my dd is actually going to pelvic floor at a hospital so they take insurance, including medicaid. we just have a high deductible plan but the hospital has like a 40 percent discount for local people. not sure if your therapist is in or out of network but just throwing it out there. I'm also going to a pelvic floor therapist but she's cash pay.

amother

Sunflower

Wed, May 03 2023, 11:36 am

amother OP wrote:

My 8 y/o just refuses to be toilet trained. She has accidents constantly (multiple per day many times) and I'm at the end of my rope.

We've tried urologist, GI, behavioral therapist, OT, medications, bribes, threats and nothing seems to work for too long.

Maybe someone has the secret answer because I've given up Crying

Didn't read the whole thread.

Are you sure she hasn't been sxually abused? Because that can cause these kinds of issues.

And has she been evaluated for ASD? Or epilepsy?

ASD - because this kind of thing is typical for ASD kids. Epilepsy - because if she is having multiple seizures each day that could explain why she's not managing to control her bladder.

To diagnose epilepsy you would get her an EEG. ASD you need a psychologist to diagnose.

amother

Ballota

Wed, May 03 2023, 12:06 pm

amother Dandelion wrote:

If it were Asd what can help?

Asd isn’t a cause, it’s a concurrent symptom, or group of symptoms. Addressing the root cause can help.

amother

Dandelion

Wed, May 03 2023, 12:07 pm

So then getting a diagnosis for Asd would t seem to help..
It’s more what’s going on like distraction, sensory, pelvic etc

amother

Bergamot

Wed, May 03 2023, 8:08 pm

amother Ballota wrote:

Wow this is fascinating because my son has this and encopresis!

So how do I get him help? Already been to orofacial myology and to ENT to check for enlarged adenoids and tonsils.

Now what?