I changed my words

cupcake123

Thu, Nov 09 2023, 8:13 pm

dena613 wrote:

Just hung up with my sister. She ended with, "Have a good day!"
To me it feels like a Bracha.
I can use all the Brachos I can get.
Can't we all?

When people tell me "have a good day " a lot of times I'll respond with amen!

zaq

Thu, Nov 09 2023, 8:35 pm

"May it be a nice day"?
But what if she doesn't want a nice day, huh? Ever think of that? Maybe she wants a perfectly miserable day and there you go ruining it for her and plotting a nice one, even though you're not wishing one for her in so many words. Just leave her day alone, willya?

amf

Thu, Nov 09 2023, 8:39 pm

zaq wrote:

"a day."

We should all not speak to each other. Just bow like the Japanese in greeting ( Hiding

its not cultural appropriation, it's multiculturalism!)

amother

Blueberry

Thu, Nov 09 2023, 8:41 pm

zaq wrote:

I've met some kids who literally love bad days.
The more miserable they can be the better.

amother

Lightgreen

Thu, Nov 09 2023, 9:00 pm

44now wrote:

OP has disappeared completely. I think that tells you that she was doing it just to rile us up.

I wouldn’t draw that conclusion. If I had written a post that garnered such unanimous criticism and name calling - especially if I was the type to be sensitive enough to implications of words, it goes without saying words themselves - I would also run away.

amother

Jetblack

Thu, Nov 09 2023, 9:07 pm

I only read page 1 and you know what, I like "thanks for your contribution". It's true, they live here too. They're not "helping" me, they're doing their share towards the running of the household.

smss

Thu, Nov 09 2023, 9:14 pm

I think it's important to be in tune with how your children receive your words.

I once had a student whose mother would tell her every day when she dropped her off in this patronizing kind of way "make it a good day!" And it was clear the child felt annoyed by it. That's a moment when you really want to connect with your child positively before you separate from them for the day and the mom was turning it into a moment of disconnect and resentment instead (and definitely not teaching the lesson she thought she was teaching, because she was so unaligned with her child's experience).

Sooo if "have a good day" doesn't land right with your child and different language lands better, ok. But I don't think there's a universal right/wrong here.

amother

Valerian

Thu, Nov 09 2023, 9:14 pm

zaq wrote:

That’s a really good point. I think we should just say “Day” and allow everyone to decide on their own what kind of day it is. Obviously, if it’s night, you’ll say “night”.
Although things will get confusing if people identify “night” as “day” or vice versa. So maybe it’s not a good idea after all

amother

Molasses

Thu, Nov 09 2023, 9:27 pm

amother Jetblack wrote:

I only read page 1 and you know what, I like "thanks for your contribution". It's true, they live here too. They're not "helping" me, they're doing their share towards the running of the household.

Exactly so, when they help around the house they contribute to the running of the household. In that case thanking them for their help is sufficient.

Cheiny

Thu, Nov 09 2023, 11:57 pm

amother OP wrote:

I don’t 100% agree with it because it’s semantics, but I heard recently you shouldn’t tell your children to have a great day because it’s telling them what to do or something like that. I started changing it a bit. Now I say, I wish you a great day!

I also used to say, thanks for your help. Now I say, thanks for your contribution. They live here and shouldn’t be helping, but contributing.

There’s such a thing as overthinking. This is one example.