And yet another S/O babies

amother

Wed, Jan 29 2020, 11:15 pm

One of the things I always wondered about with women who have so many babies close together is the toll it takes on their health.
Are you not nervous to get pregnant so quickly after having just had a baby? Women who have done it multiple times, have you had any complications?
Someone I know has 5 in 7 years and is now pregnant again. Her youngest is 8 months. She is having serious complications and is on bedrest for the next 7 months or until they feel the baby is healthy enough to survive.
I know anyone can have complications - with a first or a tenth...but I can't imagine its healthy to keep getting pregnant so often.

ora_43

Wed, Jan 29 2020, 11:38 pm

5 in 7 years means an average of a year between giving birth and getting pregnant again.

There are mild risks associated with getting pregnant that soon, but they're mostly of the "if you take your vitamins you should be fine" variety.

I get why getting pregnant within a year might feel risky. And for some people, depending on circumstances, it might be too much (mostly, if they're already exhausted by caring for a baby, and don't have the support they need to get the rest they need during pregnancy). But it's not really medically risky except in specific circumstances.

SuperWify

Wed, Jan 29 2020, 11:42 pm

I don’t understand it either. My one pregnancy took such a toll on my body I didn’t feel well physically until my child was 18 months.

And it was considered a normal pregnancy.

I asked on the other thread how a poster was ok going to the mikvah pp sans birth control but it seems from her response she nurses and therefore doesn’t get pregnant right away. So I’m asking here again for those that can get pregnant 2 months pp- how do and can you handle that? There are so many siblings just 10-15 months apart out there and I really really wonder how their moms did it.

amother

Cobalt

Thu, Jan 30 2020, 12:02 am

I'm 41, currently after 2 miscarriages. One needed a d and c the other was an empty sac. When we asked the doctor if I should go on bc he said I'm healthy, fit, no medical history, so he sees no reason to avoid another one as long as I am emotionally capable of coping with an additional loss which is highly likely due to my advanced age.

Not everyone gets an unhealthy body from having "too many kids".

amother

Aubergine

Thu, Jan 30 2020, 7:10 am

I dont agree that too many pregnancies causes health problems or. ....my mom had a baby every year and has kids in double digits but bh bli ayinde Hora now she is healthy....

It's my dad who has health issues unfortunately...so too my mil who has 9 kids bli ayinde hora... I know a lot of women with large families and while I see a lot of them being overwhelmed especially with dhs who dont help and finances overwhelming them, they bh bli ayin hora dont have a problem with "being healthy"....I think some women can tolerate many pregnancies/birth and some cant (of course some women have easier pregnancies/births and others dont)

amother

Saddlebrown

Thu, Jan 30 2020, 7:16 am

amother [ OP ] wrote:

I have 3 kids in 4 years and people tell me I look 15 and can't believe I'm married. I'm very healthy. If you take your prenatals and eat well it shouldn't be an issue. Everyone is different.

amother

Rose

Thu, Jan 30 2020, 7:24 am

A man came to the chazan ish and relayed excitedly that his wife had just given birth. The rav told him sternly "what a rasha you are!" because she had a baby a year earlier too and a woman should have sufficient recovery time.
My great grandfather was witness to this story

amother

Amethyst

Thu, Jan 30 2020, 7:36 am

amother [ OP ] wrote:

Just going to say that damage sometimes shows up much later, and even someone who seems to have bounced back easily might have hidden issues.

Pregnancy takes a toll. Pelvic floor issues, for example, can cause incompetence and require repeated surgeries to fix. How many of those having babies every year do constant physical therapy for their pelvic floor muscles? Pelvic floor muscles heal somewhat on their own with time but a baby every year doesn't give them a chance to heal, so you need to be doing weekly exercises throughout the pregnancy and postpartum if you don't want prolapse.

And that's just one example. There are other issues which can also come up.

amother

cornflower

Thu, Jan 30 2020, 7:44 am

Its true that it takes a toll on health. The chance of PPD each time, dental issues, osteoporosis, etc. Also if your uterus has had it, you may need a hysterectomy.
But these things are individual and in the hands of Hashem. We must take care of ourselves and do our best.

amother

Aquamarine

Thu, Jan 30 2020, 8:01 am

I think that in the ideal world, women were meant to nurse their babies for 2 years, giving them natural spacing (because supposedly everyone nursed clean in the olden days.)
If true, that would support the idea of space between kids being what nature intended.
Not sure what those women who used wet nurses did. Though Iirc, there are discussions about different methods of bc in the gemara, and we know it was a thing from the earliest days of history.

amother

Amethyst

Thu, Jan 30 2020, 8:04 am

amother [ cornflower ] wrote:

For some reason, during breastfeeding and during and just after weaning, your bones are able to receive calcium (like they did when you were a child and teen) and rebuild their stores. Pregnancy takes calcium out of your bones, too many pregnancies close together take a toll on your bones, but nursing helps reverse that.

amother

Amethyst

Thu, Jan 30 2020, 8:28 am

amother [ Bronze ] wrote:

Many of the women I know that had large families needed hysterectomies because of prolapse once they hit middle age.

I have a friend who's a nurse and she says fecal incontinence is also common, especially among those who have babies year after year....requires multiple surgeries and is never really fixed. That's what scares me most and pushed me to start physiotherapy...

amother

Lime

Thu, Jan 30 2020, 9:03 am

amother [ Rose ] wrote:

Oh come on, if this is true there is definitely more to the story.

amother

Rose

Thu, Jan 30 2020, 9:10 am

Nopes he was trying to educate us on this subject and how big rabbonin viewed it. The reason why the chazzan ish said hes a rasha was because he allowed his wife to go to the mikva. According to the rav, he should have withheld for a few months. Obviously they were greater people than us but thank god we have the other options.