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When to get involved and when to let them figure it out

 
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amother




OP
 

Post Sun, Apr 25 2021, 10:51 am
I grew up with a helicopter mother who called teachers and principals and got involved whenever I complained about things. Now I have a hard time handling any discomfort. I don’t want that for my children.

My oldest is only 3 but I find that I never know when to get involved if a kid is fighting with him Or he wants something and wants me to ask for him. I feel like I’m always taking care that he gets what he wants and I’m probably not doing him any favors (like if he wants something specific and I fight for him to get it instead of just saying that the can’t have it now etc). In general, how do you know when to get involved and when to let him figure things out himself or just be disappointed?
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amother




OP
 

Post Sun, Apr 25 2021, 12:13 pm
Bump
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amother




Lawngreen
 

Post Sun, Apr 25 2021, 12:15 pm
While it can vary situation to situation in general a 3 year old is a toddler. Due to his age you can definitely help him out make sure it is safe and guide to better middos.
Good for you for recognizing your own personal issue to which you are reacting, don't throw out the baby with the bathwater and go too far in the other direction still looking for a one size fits all.
Best to get a parenting mentor/class so you can better distinguish and achieve your worthwhile goal.
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amother




Denim
 

Post Sun, Apr 25 2021, 12:27 pm
amother [ Lawngreen ] wrote:
While it can vary situation to situation in general a 3 year old is a toddler. Due to his age you can definitely help him out make sure it is safe and guide to better middos.
Good for you for recognizing your own personal issue to which you are reacting, don't throw out the baby with the bathwater and go too far in the other direction still looking for a one size fits all.
Best to get a parenting mentor/class so you can better distinguish and achieve your worthwhile goal.


not to hijack this thread, located in lakewood if you know of "parenting/mentor" for same issue, will be following this topic.
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amother




Magenta
 

Post Sun, Apr 25 2021, 12:44 pm
As someone who also has a helicopter mom and she's still helicoptering my kids and my kids are teens I second taking parenting classes. I keep on taking different ones and got a good base and know how to step back with confidence.

My mom thinks I'm a negligent parent being that I give my kids the space they need - and I know my kids appreciate the space since they get triggered from my mom's overbearing nature....
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