Does this warrant a call to the rebbe?

amother

Tue, Sep 12 2023, 5:46 pm

Ds5 was hurt a lot last year by a few out of control kids in his class. We started him in a new place this year and specifically told the rebbe we want him to feel safe and he’s extra sensitive to being hurt by other kids. Today ds came home with a deep scratch on his face that I hope won’t leave a scar. He said a kid in his class did it. He said it hurt so much he couldn’t breathe. Seems his rebbe wasn’t in the class when it happened (my feeling is that it was between Hebrew and English) but when he came in he asked my son if he’s okay and he said he’ll punish the kid and gave ds a lolly.

Should we call the rebbe or just wait and see? And what am I asking of the rebbe if I call him?

amother

Green

Tue, Sep 12 2023, 5:49 pm

Absolutely call. Find out how it will be dealt with and what the plan is going forward to make sure he won't be hurt again. 5 is too young to leave unsupervised.

happy chick

Tue, Sep 12 2023, 5:50 pm

absolutely you can call the rebbi. not in an accusing manner, youd like to know what happened and see what measures will be taken to make sure it doesnt happen again. he definitely should have sent home a message that something happened.

amother

Mint

Tue, Sep 12 2023, 6:19 pm

I’d call so the Rebbe knows that your child has a mother who’s on top of things and paying attention. Even just that is important

amother

Chartreuse

Tue, Sep 12 2023, 6:23 pm

Is he an easy victim? Maybe you can send him to some karate lessons or teach him some self defense methods. I remember my mother teaching me some stuff in case of assault. B"H I was never assaulted, but knowing how to deal with it gave me an inner confidence that said 'don't mess with me'. I think people can pick up on that.

And yes, call the rebbe.

amother

Cognac

Tue, Sep 12 2023, 7:21 pm

I'm horrified that the rebbi didn't call you. Yes, call him. What happened? How was it dealt with? What steps will be taken so it doesn't happen again?

hodeez

Tue, Sep 12 2023, 7:25 pm

Of course call and then get the kids address so you can reciprocate

Kidding but seriously a non accidental deep scratch on the face needs to be dealt with!

amother

Beige

Tue, Sep 12 2023, 7:36 pm

amother Cognac wrote:

I'm horrified that the rebbi didn't call you. Yes, call him. What happened? How was it dealt with? What steps will be taken so it doesn't happen again?

Yes I agree, why didn’t he call you if you specifically spoke to him in advance about this kind of behavior….

amother

Daylily

Tue, Sep 12 2023, 9:22 pm

REBBE:
1. Call now and aside from discussing the situation, nicely also let him know that in the future (c”v), he should call YOU if your dc gets hurt.
2. Make sure you get answer from rebbe as to HOW he will deal (he shld ospeak to parent of child who did this, including letting them know they need to make sure child’s nails are kept trimmed and clean. Yes, can happen with short nails but still has to be done).
3. Make sure rebbe is now on the lookout around the other boy. Etc…. Nip it in the bud asap. BE”H

SCRATCH:
1. Wash scratch well (gently) daily.
2. Bactriban ointment starting now, morn and night until it closes, then nightly once it scabs until scab gone. 3. Vitamin E oil starting now, morn and night for a few months…
4. There are gel scar strips.
5. I would have a plastic surgeon evaluate and guide you. BE”H his should fully heal but scratches *can* leave real scars..

Bhatzlacha

amother

Electricblue

Tue, Sep 12 2023, 10:38 pm

I work in a preschool and whenever a kid hurts themselves more than just a little something we always call the mother as soon as it happens. I’m really surprised you didn’t hear from the rebbe. I would call the rebbe, your child needs you to defend him!

amother

Tue, Sep 12 2023, 10:40 pm

I called him and he didn’t really know what happened! He seemed very flustered, didn’t remember when it happened, first he told me my son was crying a little, later on he said he was hysterical. He didn’t see it happen and said the kid is usually a sweet and gentle kid, he can’t imagine it was done on purpose. If this happens again I’m going higher up.

amother

Daylily

Tue, Sep 12 2023, 11:32 pm

amother OP wrote:

It probably was a one time thing and probably was an accident.

Child still needs to be watched to confirm this is the case..

And in any case, a parent MUST be called anytime a DC truly hurt.

Take it from someone who has been there…

amother

Dill

Tue, Sep 12 2023, 11:34 pm

Tried and true: wash the area with warm water and soap. Air dry . Apply a streistrip onto the scratch. Heals really nicely. If you have the yellow streistrip , even better.

amother

Daylily

Wed, Sep 13 2023, 12:05 am

SCRATCH:
1. Wash scratch well (gently) daily.
2. Bactriban ointment starting now, morn and night until it closes, then nightly once it scabs until scab gone. 3. Vitamin E oil starting now, morn and night for a few months…
4. There are gel scar strips as well.
5. I would have a plastic surgeon evaluate and guide you. BE”H his should fully heal but scratches *can* leave real scars..