Sleeping in the Sukkah rant

amother

Mon, Oct 02 2023, 8:18 am

My husband likes to sleep in the
Sukkah. We have 3 little kids who don't reliably sleep through the night, but they all want only me in the night so what's the difference? We agree he'll only sleep outside chol hamoed when I can call him to come help if I need.
Last night we have 3 wake ups before he even makes it outside that he helps with. He finally heads outside and I go to sleep. Half an hour later 2 kids (one nursing baby) are up, takes me an hour to get them back down. I sleep 12-4, then baby's up again. I finally get him down at 5. 5:30 toddler wakes up. I call my husband to take her and go back to sleep. 6 I'm woken by his alarm that he left in the bedroom even though he didn't sleep there! Then he has the aduacity to complain he's tired because he woke up at 5 because it was cold in the Sukkah. When's my night off?

(Truth is only thing that was different than usual is I had to get the toddler out of bed at 5:30 before she woke her sister and his stupid alarm )

amother

Mon, Oct 02 2023, 8:48 am

amother Lotus wrote:

I don’t let my husband sleep in the sukkah for this reason (so he can help when kids wake up)

He can't help the breastfed baby or the toddler who insists "only ema" anyway.

amother

Salmon

Mon, Oct 02 2023, 10:05 am

This is my rant always.
When is my night to sleep? Seriously husband complains he couldn't sleep because the dryer kept him up an extra 30 minutes. But I was up 3 times to put a nursing baby to sleep!!! And I HAVE TO WORK TODAY!!

It was his choice to sleep in the sukkah. He can't complain about it. Now he knows.

amother

Hydrangea

Mon, Oct 02 2023, 10:10 am

amother Lotus wrote:

I don’t let my husband sleep in the sukkah for this reason (so he can help when kids wake up)

Sleeping in the sukka is halacha, not something the wife gets to "let" or not.
If you need him at night, wake him.

amother

Sage

Mon, Oct 02 2023, 11:29 am

I davka love sukos! My husband sleeps with all the kids in the sukka. I go to sleep with just my nursing baby and lock my bedroom door. Best sleep of the year. OP tell him to take them with him to the sukka.

amother

Lotus

Mon, Oct 02 2023, 11:45 am

amother Hydrangea wrote:

Sleeping in the sukka is halacha, not something the wife gets to "let" or not.
If you need him at night, wake him.

That would ruin the point as I would have to wake up to get him. We asked a shayla and were told if my husband is needed to wake up at night with the kids it’s considered meshamesh a choleh and totally permissible.
I can’t wake up 3 times a night and be functional at work.

amother

Mon, Oct 02 2023, 11:46 am

amother Sage wrote:

Interesting idea. But my kids go to bed very early- like before we eat dinner out there.