DH laid off again | Imamother

amother

Thu, Dec 04 2008, 9:27 am

This is becoming a very common topic here.
We survived both being layed off after 9/11..
But now we lost money from the bad stock market. And it happened again- he just got layed off.
Not a good writer and feel so terrible, dont know what to say.
Just venting.

sunshine!

Thu, Dec 04 2008, 9:41 am

My husband was laid off at the beginning of the school year and is still looking for a job. The only thing you can do is Daven, stay positive, and support him in his quest for a new job. My husband has pursued several leads and uses me as a sounding board for the various suggestions that come up. I also try to be frugal and cut corners wherever necessary. And I NEVER make him feel bad that he is out of work, in any context of conversation.

amother

Fri, Dec 12 2008, 3:09 am

OP, I feel your pain. My husband was out of work for quite a long time and it was terrible, not just financially but mentally. The quicker he gets around it and focus on finding the next job the less traumatising it gets. DH was so devastated when he was made redundant it took him a while to pick up courage to start looking for the new job. We also know quite a number of people who is in financial services made redundant over the last several months--it's horrible, but the most important part is to be aware people are not made redundant because they are incapable or less talented. It is a totally at random decision company makes.

I counted every penny in the house, tightened the budget as much as possible. I was obviously quite worried about the financial situation but everytime DH asked me how we're doing I never tried to sound too alarmed. I thought of an emergency plan, what we can do if we didn't have a paycheck for 1month, 3 month, etc. Can you consider a temp work or a part-time? That can ease pressure on your husband. I encouraged DH to ask his shul buddies for any leads/network, and I asked for the same around people I know--it's hard but people eventually do find out he's out of work.

freidasima

Fri, Dec 12 2008, 3:29 am

I commiserate and add my worried. My middle dd was just laid off, oldest ds doesn't have a real job and no chance of finding one now....everything you are doing is right. Be flexible. Daven. Hope. Encourage. And see if there are ways of earning a bit at home.

Anyone believe in taking in boarders or is that not done in our generation? My grandparents married in 1928, my mother was born in 1929 and then the great depression started. My grandfather was a housepainter and he was out of work six months out of every year until 1940. My grandmother took in boarders to make ends meet as she had a little baby at home and a big apartment. They had boarders until my mother was 18. she slept first in her parents room and then on a folding cot in the living room until then. Not that I am advocating that, but there are ways to make money at home even with small babies...