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Forum
-> Parenting our children
Rappel
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Thu, Jul 11 2019, 10:16 am
I'm tired today. I'm sure tomorrow will be better. But meanwhile, I just want to get this off my chest:
Could my son, just for once, maybe, in a blue moon, listen to an instruction without first stopping to question/challenge/propose an alternate option???
He's 3, and he's sweet, and a little mischievous. He's energetic, stubborn, caring, and can be extremely hyper/off kilter at times. He's overall reasonable, once something has been explained extensively. He has excellent 3 year-old hearing: that is to say, that once he focuses on a task, he completely tunes you out.
I am so proud and happy that he is inquisitive, interactive, and that he's not afraid of us.
But on days like today, I wish he had a little respect, and just LISTENED for once! Just ask the question WHILE you're already doing what I asked you to do!
Gaaaahhhhh!
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amother
Pearl
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Thu, Jul 11 2019, 10:26 am
Oh my can I relate! Except mine is turning 10 and still doing that However, it's been serving him really well in learning, so there's that....
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chanatron1000
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Thu, Jul 11 2019, 10:55 am
At 3, they don't yet know that they are capable of hurting you.
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ShishKabob
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Thu, Jul 11 2019, 10:56 am
chanatron1000 wrote: | At 3, they don't yet know that they are capable of hurting you. |
They sure do, maybe they don't know the extent of it but they know that it affects you negatively.
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chanatron1000
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Thu, Jul 11 2019, 11:03 am
ShishKabob wrote: | They sure do, maybe they don't know the extent of it but they know that it affects you negatively. |
They know that they react negatively, but they still don't think of adults as vulnerable people.
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cinnamon
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Thu, Jul 11 2019, 11:09 am
"You will now do xyz and I'll explain why when your done" rinse and repeat.
It's a work in progress with all my kids (ages 2.5 - 11) but works eventually.
.
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ShishKabob
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Thu, Jul 11 2019, 11:12 am
chanatron1000 wrote: | They know that they react negatively, but they still don't think of adults as vulnerable people. |
True
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amother
Hotpink
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Thu, Jul 11 2019, 11:15 am
My almost three year old does that too! I could go crazy!!
Also, many times she just answers back. Like "come here, let me dress you" She: "no, you come here and I'll dress you!" She thinks it's funny. I don't know what to say...
And they sure know they can hurt you! When she hurts me, I pretend cry, since she's very little. She comes to give me a kiss.
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amother
Violet
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Thu, Jul 11 2019, 11:19 am
Hi op! I’ve been through the same thing! My now four year old is exactly the same! I’ve stared incorporating aspects of gentle parenting and the difference is huge! It’s not magic, but I feel so much calmer and my kids do too. In a nutshell I would say it’s respecting your kids as people. Not trying to control them. If u have Instagram, check out blimie heller (unconditional parenting) she is amazing!
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Rappel
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Thu, Jul 11 2019, 11:42 am
Pearl - that will be a comfort someday. But I feel guilty now at how relieved I am when I can put him in mishpachton, and not have to be firing on all pistons, constantly!
Cinnamon - how many years for it take to stick? I would kill for some sanity, but we are definitely at the stage of "Oh, you have a rule? Let me test it!" Every. Single. Time. I can be completely consistent for 99 times, and he'll still try his luck on the 100th.
Hot pink - that's adorable! I remember the first time my son said "No, I'mma, I'm going to change YOUR diaper," it caught me by surprise , until I considered that that was a 2 year old's version of a joke - turning reality upside down, on its head. So then we would just laugh together.
Violet - I am DEFINITELY going to Google her! I need some new tools to keep up with the mad hatter days.
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amother
Violet
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Thu, Jul 11 2019, 11:47 am
[quote="Violet - I am DEFINITELY going to Google her! I need some new tools to keep up with the mad hatter days.[/quote]
I totally understand that feeling. Check her out. Blimie actually has a parenting course (I took it online) and it was a huge mind shift! She shows you how to look at parenting from a whole different perspective. It really spoke to me and has been life changing for me personally.
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amother
Cerulean
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Thu, Jul 11 2019, 12:28 pm
Rappel wrote: | I'm tired today. I'm sure tomorrow will be better. But meanwhile, I just want to get this off my chest:
Could my son, just for once, maybe, in a blue moon, listen to an instruction without first stopping to question/challenge/propose an alternate option???
He's 3, and he's sweet, and a little mischievous. He's energetic, stubborn, caring, and can be extremely hyper/off kilter at times. He's overall reasonable, once something has been explained extensively. He has excellent 3 year-old hearing: that is to say, that once he focuses on a task, he completely tunes you out.
I am so proud and happy that he is inquisitive, interactive, and that he's not afraid of us.
But on days like today, I wish he had a little respect, and just LISTENED for once! Just ask the question WHILE you're already doing what I asked you to do!
Gaaaahhhhh! |
He’s 3. I think ur not being realistic. Or fair.
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yerushamama
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Thu, Jul 11 2019, 12:46 pm
amother [ Cerulean ] wrote: | He’s 3. I think ur not being realistic. Or fair. |
No, she is being a normal, frustrated mother of a normal 3 year old - hoping that someone has ideas on how to make things easier!
Rappel, they do outgrow it - eventually (hopefully by the time they get married... ). Don't feel guilty about enjoying sending him to mishpachton - at his age they really do need time with other kids. Just take a deep breath and get used to saying various versions of "because I said so". Like my mother always says when my kids act out "I just HATE when they act age appropriate!"
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Rappel
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Thu, Jul 11 2019, 1:12 pm
yerushamama wrote: | No, she is being a normal, frustrated mother of a normal 3 year old - hoping that someone has ideas on how to make things easier!
Rappel, they do outgrow it - eventually (hopefully by the time they get married... ). Don't feel guilty about enjoying sending him to mishpachton - at his age they really do need time with other kids. Just take a deep breath and get used to saying various versions of "because I said so". Like my mother always says when my kids act out "I just HATE when they act age appropriate!" |
Thank you for your sympathy, and your mother's comedy. You hit the nail on the head!
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Laiya
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Thu, Jul 11 2019, 1:50 pm
Rappel wrote: | Pearl - that will be a comfort someday. But I feel guilty now at how relieved I am when I can put him in mishpachton, and not have to be firing on all pistons, constantly!
Cinnamon - how many years for it take to stick? I would kill for some sanity, but we are definitely at the stage of "Oh, you have a rule? Let me test it!" Every. Single. Time. I can be completely consistent for 99 times, and he'll still try his luck on the 100th.
Hot pink - that's adorable! I remember the first time my son said "No, I'mma, I'm going to change YOUR diaper," it caught me by surprise , until I considered that that was a 2 year old's version of a joke - turning reality upside down, on its head. So then we would just laugh together.
Violet - I am DEFINITELY going to Google her! I need some new tools to keep up with the mad hatter days. |
He sounds like a threenager
I"h one day his confidence, energy and creativity will serve him well.
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