Am I justified in being very disappointed?

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amother

Tue, Jul 23 2019, 5:57 pm

I recently bought a book online that seemed to be written by a frum, sheitel-wearing author. The main story line was about adultery with plenty of other aveiros thrown in.

I don't want to mention the name of the book in case it's loshon hora, though I am not sure. I think I've seen somewhere that when an author or artist puts their work into the public domain, they are giving people permission to review it for good or bad.

What do you think about either point?

oliveoil

Tue, Jul 23 2019, 6:27 pm

Who was it published by?

Was it in any way marketed as a frum Jewish book?

amother

Chocolate

Tue, Jul 23 2019, 6:37 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

Is your book review going to be blasting the author for writing a book about adultery and other aveiros?

I don't see the connection to the subject line of this post.

amother

Tue, Jul 23 2019, 6:42 pm

I don't plan to write a review, I was just thinking of discussing it here.

Quote:

Who was it published by?

Picador

Quote:

Was it in any way marketed as a frum Jewish book?

Not at all. I just didn't expect this from a frum woman.

oliveoil

Tue, Jul 23 2019, 6:50 pm

Sure, discuss the book like any other book, but her being frum - and your assumption that a frum woman would/should only write frum books - should have nothing to do with it.

imasinger

Tue, Jul 23 2019, 6:52 pm

What makes you think the author was frum? Maybe she's a cancer survivor who wears a wig?

Let's remember not to judge a book by its cover.

amother

Chocolate

Tue, Jul 23 2019, 6:54 pm

What do you want to discuss here? How disappointed you are by a frum woman you don't know?

amother

Khaki

Tue, Jul 23 2019, 6:56 pm

Following. I’ve written several books, most of them for a frum audience. In my younger years I wrote a couple secular books that gave a wrong impression and possibly caused a chilul Hashem. It’s something I deeply regret and I was told by a rabbi that my teshuva should focus on using my future writing to make a kiddush Hashem. I didn’t write the book OP mentioned, but I think that it is important for all of us to be mindful of who we are and Who we represent in every part of our lives, personal and professional.

zaq

Tue, Jul 23 2019, 7:10 pm

I don’t believe there’s any reason for you to “justify” your opinion. When you read a book, you are entitled to react to it any way you like, regardless of the author’s reputation and popular opinion about the book.

I don’t know what you were expecting from this book (I can’t even guess which book or author you’re talking about), but if you were disappointed in it, so what? If this book is typical of that author, you’ll know not to pick up any of his or her other works. If this book is a radical departure from that author’s usual work, well, you win some, you lose some. You’re not obligated to love every book that an author writes.And if you aren't impressed with a book when you start reading, well, you’re not in junior high school anymore and you’re not obligated to finish it or risk a demerit in class.

AYLOR But I would think that there is a world of difference between

“Ms.Author claims to be a frum woman, but her latest work, chock-full of filthy language, gratuitous violence and s@x and graphic descriptions of every imaginable sin including those of which we say “yehareg ve-al yaavor”, proves otherwise. She can hardly call herself an observant woman if she writes in this disgusting way, and I urge all right-thinking Yidden to demonstrate in front of her house and burn her books publicly if she can’t be put in cherem.”

and

“ I was deeply disappointed in Ms. Author’s latest book. Ms Author being a frum woman, I expected it to be a morally uplifting tale written in clean language that tiptoes delicately around sensitive or unpleasant topics where such topics are unavoidable and letoeles. It was anything but. Full of nivul peh and gratuitous sin of every sort, it’s highly inappropriate for a frum audience.”

amother

Tue, Jul 23 2019, 7:10 pm

Quote:

I think that it is important for all of us to be mindful of who we are and Who we represent in every part of our lives, personal and professional.

I could not agree more.

Quote:

Maybe she's a cancer survivor who wears a wig?

She has a Jewish name and 8 children. Ya think?

However, now I looked her up on Wikipedia & see she's an LGBT activist. So I guess it's my own fault for not doing more research.

ETA Also from various images that came up it seems she no longer wears a sheitel, so the picture of an aidel-looking frum woman on her first book is rather deceptive.

amother

Chartreuse

Tue, Jul 23 2019, 7:11 pm

No, you're not really justified.

The publishing company is not a Jewish one, presumably you didn't buy it from a Jewish store, and I imagine the character names and blurbs would have given away what the book is about.

I'd be pretty disappointed too if that happened to me.

polka dots

Tue, Jul 23 2019, 7:16 pm

I do think that it is interesting that a frum woman wrote a book without Jewish value. Even if it’s not written on the cover I would think that there could be an expectation that the book should be for a frum audience, so I get why the op was disappointed when it wasn’t.
I’m not saying that the author HAD to write a Jewish book or that she has no right to do what she did, but I do think that it’s expected by the costumer.

nylon

Tue, Jul 23 2019, 7:24 pm

You're certainly entitled to feel however you want. However Picador is a general publisher. I would never expect that someone who chooses to publish through a general publisher is catering to frum expectations. IN fact with fiction I would be more likely to expect the opposite--that it was a novel that doesn't meet the requirements of the religious publishers.

urban gypsy

Wed, Jul 24 2019, 10:37 am

amother [ OP ] wrote:

To be perfectly honest I found your post very frustrating and I don't understand your point or question. How do you choose books? Did you search by author photo? Did you not read the description or comments online beforehand? What did you expect?

How is it lashon hara to say that someone wrote a book about adultery and other aveiros if they published it with their name and photograph? Obviously she is fine with that being common knowledge and you are entitled to like it or dislike it. What is complicated or confusing about that?

How is it deceptive for someone to put a picture of themselves on their book? Should she have put a bag over her head, dyed her hair green, or tattooed I AM NOT ADEQUATELY FRUM BEWARE on her forehead in the picture? People change ideas and appearance over time. And this is a great lesson for you not to judge people (or books) based on how they look.

I am a frum writer but I would never write fiction about Jews or kosher topics. I sometimes wonder if I would have the courage to publish under my own name and photograph because of fearing how people would judge me but your post made me feel more resolved to write however I want because there is no pleasing everyone Speechless

urban gypsy

Wed, Jul 24 2019, 10:40 am

polka dots wrote:

Why??? Why on earth would someone expect that??? I am just flabbergasted by this level of entitlement. Unless this was published by a frum publisher (it wasn't) or being sold in a frum Judaica store (it wasn't) why would think it was "kosher" book????? Can't Believe It

urban gypsy

Wed, Jul 24 2019, 10:46 am

Someone just told me who the author is.
For future reference, not everyone named Goldie is even Jewish, just in case you order a DVD starring Goldie Hawn expecting it to be kosher.

urban gypsy

Wed, Jul 24 2019, 10:51 am

zaq wrote:

“Ms.Author claims to be a frum woman,

I don't see any evidence of the author claiming anything beyond her name and her appearance, which OP mistakenly construed as frum. OP needs to own her mistake and not project her thoughts on the author's intentions.

FranticFrummie

Wed, Jul 24 2019, 10:51 am

Urban Gypsy, you NAILED everything I wanted to say.

Who buys a book without at least knowing what it's vaguely about?

Two seconds of Googling will tell you everything you need to know.

amother

Chocolate

Wed, Jul 24 2019, 11:01 am

urban gypsy wrote:

Someone just told me who the author is.
For future reference, not everyone named Goldie is even Jewish, just in case you order a DVD starring Goldie Hawn expecting it to be kosher.

Her mother was Jewish.

urban gypsy

Wed, Jul 24 2019, 11:05 am

amother [ Chocolate ] wrote:

Her mother was Jewish.

You are correct, but my point still stands as I wrote it.
That might be a bad example but I have encountered non Jewish people named Goldie.

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